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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23115847">Unfortunately Famous</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkpillow19/pseuds/pinkpillow19'>pinkpillow19</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Once Upon a Time (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Feels, Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon LGBTQ Female Character, Celebrities, Conventions, F/F, Fame, Hollywood, LGBTQ Character of Color, LGBTQ Themes, SwanQueen AU, SwanQueen Fanfiction Facebook Group (Once Upon a Time), swanqueen - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:21:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>44,140</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23115847</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkpillow19/pseuds/pinkpillow19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Emma Swan started today like any other. She heroically took out the cat poop during a rainstorm, might have missed the dumpster, and might have peed herself, if only a little. But what she never saw coming her way, was Regina Mills. Unfortunately for Emma Swan, Miss Mills was Unfortunately Famous.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>92</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>371</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Emma Swan hated cleaning. Her blonde curls twirled high on her head in a messy bun that never actually contained her hair. She moved one more bag of trash to the front door, preparing to take them out, when something knocked into the bag almost spilling it. </p><p>“Woah Ginger, no. not right now. Uh.” Her orange tabby cat who had not been playful in the last year had seemed to take on a new personality with the stormy weather the last few days. Luckily, it wasn’t raining at the moment so Emma could make a run for the trash bin.</p><p>“Ok Ging. You stay warm, momma’s taking out the trash.” She undid her bun and threw her hair into a low ponytail and prepped her back foot like a sprinter. Her jacket mostly zipped, the woman clearly ready to shed her clothes after this track event and take a well-deserved shower. One deep breath in, door slamming behind her, she was off!</p><p>Two large trash bags, two attempts to prop up the large disposal unit and chuck them in. Bag one went in without a hitch, bag two… wasn’t so lucky.</p><p>Emma cringed. The bag had split and let a few dinners that had gone off and cat poops tumble to the ground. Emma looked around wondering if anyone would know it was her, she wasn’t the only person with a cat in the small cul da sac. Her eyes tracked movement, something moving through the bushes toward her, moving quickly behind a building.</p><p>Emma took one last look at the spilled trash and crossed her fingers. She dumped what she could and went to round the building. When she glanced around the corner, whatever it had been was gone. She shook her head and went to turn back to her door, not looking where she was going, almost wetting herself when she ran into a person.</p><p>“Fuck! I am so sorry.” She looked up and saw that the woman looked familiar but she couldn’t place her. Was she one of the dudes from upstair's girlfriends? </p><p>The woman had dark hair cut just above her shoulders, deep brown eyes, lightly tanned skin, if only she could figure out where she knew her from…</p><p>“Regina?” Well apparently her brain knew who this was. Wait, Regina? As in Regina Mills the actress?</p><p>The woman’s eyes widened in sudden fear, her head whipping around trying to survey everything around them.</p><p>“Do I know you?” She asked warily, taking a step back, seemingly deciding if she needed to run, again.</p><p>Emma put her hands up in surrender. If this woman was Regina Mills she certainly didn’t look like a celebrity now. Her hair was unkempt, she had scrapes across one cheek, she looked like she hadn’t washed her clothes in days, and like she had ripped them climbing threw bushes.</p><p>“Hey, woah there I didn’t mean to run into you, I wasn’t looking. You just look an awful lot like…” Emma started to laugh but the woman’s eyebrows furrowed.</p><p>She started to walk backwards, then paused.</p><p>“Can I… use your phone? Please!” The last part sounded desperate.</p><p>Emma’s smile fell and she nodded.</p><p>She barely got the door open before the woman barrelled in, almost tripping over Emma’s cat.</p><p>Emma scrambled to pick her fluffball up and out of harm's way.<br/>“Hey Ging you’re ok.” Clearly glaring at the brunette woman.</p><p>She looked remorseful and was about to come up with an apology when they both heard a car screeching down the street.</p><p>Emma closed the door and engaged all of the locks. Flipping on the TV as she saw the woman start to tremble. Emma put her finger to her mouth as she held up her phone to her ear and started talking, presumably to no one and handed her cat to her guest--gesturing to the bedroom.</p><p>Regina deposited the cat on the bed and when she heard a loud banging on the door she dove under the bed and shut her eyes. The space under the bed was tight and her frantic breathing wasn’t doing much for her comfort in the small space. She closed her eyes and prayed to whatever gods, spirits whatever might be listening. She didn’t want anything to happen to the weird blond who had let her into her home. They were coming, fuck they were coming. She closed her eyes, was her vision field always this dark? When did her heart start clawing out of her chest?</p><p>Emma jumped hard, dropping her phone.<br/>“Come back later! On the phone! As I was saying, Snow…”<br/>As she picked up her phone she started to dial the police, luckily someone else must have called them the moment the car came flying down the road as sirens were heard a street over.</p><p>“Shit man! We gotta go! We’ll find her.” <br/>“She must have kept running…”</p><p>Emma heard a car door slam and take off, and a siren wailing. What the fuck was happening.</p><p>Emma took a while to calm down. She sat on the floor to focus on her breathing, then when her guest didn’t appear she made some coffee. After her functioning was back to normal her mind started to run through who was currently hiding in her bedroom. She looked around like the women might pop up and see her searching her favorite actress on her laptop. She pulled up a photo and her jaw dropped.</p><p>“No fucking way!” she looked between her computer and her hallway too many times. Slamming it shut when she heard a noise.</p><p>Fortunately, it was only her cat diving under the bed. She heard a small yelp and though her nerves were on edge she decided to go check out what was going on.</p><p>She expected to see the woman sitting on her bed or at least the floor, but she was nowhere to be seen. Emma walked over to the closet and threw open the doors, her cat bounding over to the one-room she was not allowed to go, just making it past Emma’s foot. </p><p>“Shit… you booger.” Emma left the door open as she heard a bag rustling. Maybe she wouldn’t pee on anything this time… little shit just hated when anything didn’t smell like her.</p><p>Emma looked at her bed again and knelt down, having to press her cheek to the floor to see beneath the bed.</p><p>“Hey princess I think they're gone. You ok?”</p><p>She watched a chest rise and fall rapidly.</p><p>“You can come out now… do you need help.”</p><p>When the brunette opened her eyes Emma could tell she was scared and that tears now started to fall from her eyes. On instinct, Emma reached out her hand for the hand closest to her, a hand that was trying to grip the short carpet.</p><p>“It’s ok, they left. No idea you’re here.”</p><p>The brunette nodded, “I’m sorry.”</p><p>Emma laid down and got more comfortable, “It’s ok. I mean I was scared as shit. But someone called the cops.”</p><p>Regina's hand gripped hers and they just stayed there a while. Emma had fallen asleep when she felt something poking her cheek.</p><p>“Hello? Uhm, can I come out now? I’m sort of… stuck. I also need to go to the restroom.” <br/>Emma blinked her eyes blearily, nodding and wiping drool from her face where it had been resting on the floor.</p><p>Emma moved back and helped pull the brunette out. The later looking a bit embarrassed.</p><p>She was about to speak when Emma started talking.<br/>“So like don’t freak out or anything, but I’m definitely a fan and you might find a poster or two around somewhere. I feel like a total creep…”</p><p>Regina smirked and actually let out a small laugh.<br/>“Ah. Creepy stalker fan huh?” Clearly she seemed relaxed enough that she must be joking but Emma’s cheeks burned red.</p><p>“Don’t be so cocky it’s not like you’re that hot…”</p><p>The brunette looked amused.</p><p>Emma stuck out her hand, lifting her eyes from the floor.<br/>“Emma.”</p><p>Regina leaned back against the bed and had her hand meet Emma’s.</p><p>“Regina. Mills. No pictures please.” She added a wink at the end. And Emma knew she was either in heaven or hell.<br/>……</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Regina had taken the longest shower Emma had ever heard anyone take in their life. Emma had made dinner--twice. She had watched a TV show and was now just clicking through YouTube. Thankfully Jenna Marbles had finally started to put out some new content. </p><p>When she finally heard the bathroom door open she glanced towards the hall into… nothing. It took a minute, but finally, the brunette popped her head around the wall.</p><p>“I...I don’t have any...clothes. Could I maybe, uhm, borrow something?”</p><p>Emma nodded dumbly and watched as Regina looked more relaxed, holding her towel to her chest, and walking back into the bedroom to get dressed.</p><p>Emma saw her reappear in a navy hoodie, marked by Emma’s alma mater, StoryBrooke University, and matching sweatpants. </p><p>Regina tucked some hair behind her right ear--a nervous tick Emma had noticed in interviews, and she had seen plenty of them. </p><p>The brunette nodded to the kitchen, “Mind if I find something to eat? I’ll pay you back, I promise.”</p><p>Emma swiftly guided Regina to the kitchen.<br/>“I made mac and cheese… and salmon didn’t know what you would want. The top cabinet is snacks. I think there's some fruit in the fridge, there’s some frozen chicken in the freezer…”</p><p>Regina put her hand on Emma’s arm. “Mac and cheese is fine, thank you. Could I have some of your coffee? Looks like you made a lot.” Her smile was charming and Emma instantly felt like she was under her spell.</p><p>Regina, to her credit, seemed entertained and relaxed until there were any car noises outside.</p><p>The mystery was killing Emma.<br/>“So…”</p><p>Regina sighed and put down her fork, “I was in town for an event, I never made it there…” Her eyes again did a sweep of the small apartment.</p><p>“I remember a cloth to my mouth, and I tried to scream, but the next thing I knew...I was in a car, different clothes, heading fuck knows where.”</p><p>Emma's eyes went wide, she didn’t remember Regina cursing so much in interviews. She seemed too refined for that.</p><p>“Then I found you. I… might have gotten some blood on your floor…”</p><p>Emma looked horrified, and Regina's body started to curl in on itself to take up less space, becoming smaller in her chair.</p><p>“I must have cut up my feet running through something and my arms through that bush… thank you for bringing me in by the way…I hope it’s not too much trouble.”</p><p>Emma shook her head, “No worries. We should probably get you to the hospital though to get that all checked out.”</p><p>Regina wrapped an arm around herself, eyes downcast. “I’m ok… maybe we could go tomorrow? I am so tired…”</p><p>And as if on cue her eyes started drooping.</p><p>Emma collected their empty plates.<br/>“I’ll put some clean sheets on the bed…”</p><p>The brunette rose, “No. I won’t put you out, Emma. I’ll sleep on your floor.”</p><p>Emma raised her eyebrows, “Dude there’s a couch and a bed…”</p><p>Regina almost laughed at the nickname then started to scratch at her arm.<br/>“I would… feel better, if I weren’t alone tonight. The floor is fine, if you don’t mind me being in your room?”</p><p>Emma rolled her eyes and smirked “I am sure you’ve never had to ask anyone that” she moved to her closet and started to pile blankets between the bed and the wall, creating what she hoped was a more comfortable floor. Before she was done Regina waived her off and completed the makeshift bed herself and settled in with a smile.</p><p>Emma looked down at her gross clothes and headed off to the shower. When she returned, Regina was fast asleep. Emma wondered how the woman could sleep after the day she had, but quickly hopped in bed. She figured this was all a dream anyway. One crazy ass dream.</p><p>It wasn’t. She woke up to crying and hushed whimpering. She was pondering what to say or do when suddenly there was a sharp intake of breath and the room became quieter. The crying was quickly replaced by some loud purring. Emma smiled--she loved her fur baby, she was so glad her best friend had dragged her to the shelter two years ago. Ging was a shit when she wanted to be, but she also loved on everyone. </p><p>“Hi there… I know we met earlier. I’m Regina. S-sorry, I almost stepped on you. It’s been… a rough few days.”</p><p>Emma’s heartstrings tugged at the brunette’s words. Emma shifted in the bed and the talking stopped. She faced toward the side of the bed Regina was near. And she kept her voice barely audible.</p><p>“Ging is a good listener. A shit sometimes, but she loves with her whole being.”</p><p>She was rewarded with a light laugh.<br/>“She jumped on my bladder, and started kneading.”</p><p>Emma snuggled deeper into her covers.<br/>“Yeah, she’s good at knowing when you have to go. It’s like her superpower or something.”</p><p>Regina scratched the kitten behind the ears and the purring grew louder.<br/>“What’s your superpower, Emma?” Emma could see Regina wanted a distraction and thought long and hard.</p><p>“Well… my mother always told me I was good at knowing when people were lying. Which would have been good I guess if I didn’t go around calling people out on it all of the time.”</p><p>Regina sat up a bit, sizing up Emma. “You can’t be that good. Ready to put that superpower to the test?”</p><p>Emma looked Regina in the eyes, “Bring. It. On.”</p><p>Regina touched one finger to her lips and snapped.<br/>“Ok two truths and a lie, and remember lying is my day job.”</p><p>Emma looked a bit dumbfounded.</p><p>Regina smiled, "Cause I'm an actor?"</p><p>Emma nodded. “Oh duh. Alright. You're on!”</p><p>Regina thought for a moment, biting her cheek in thought, as she searched for some information that hopefully Emma wouldn't know.</p><p>“Ok. My favorite color is purple. I didn’t love my ex-husband. I’ve never slept with a woman.”</p><p>Emma laughed. “You’re cheating.”</p><p>Regina’s eyebrow rose. “Excuse me.”</p><p>Emma rolled her eyes and landed on Regina’s dark eyes.</p><p>“You’re favorite color is purple according to about what, 50 interviews? Truth. You didn’t love your ex-husband. That was pretty easy to see, it was like you were trying too hard. Truth. And come on the last one has to be true, you’ve never talked about being part of the LGBTQ community, but your support has been greatly appreciated. So truth. There was no lie…</p><p>Regina’s stomach clenched.<br/>“Not everyone is brave enough to live their truth…”<br/>Regina bit her lip.<br/>“I was going to tell all truths… I...well you lost. I win.” She ran her hand through her hair.</p><p>She wiggled back down into her covers. <br/>“Not your superpower I’m afraid.”</p><p>Emma sat up, “2 out of 3, come on. My turn. Let’s see. Ginger is my first pet. I was adopted. I used to strip.”</p><p>Regina’s eyes went wide, taking in Emma’s form. The girl was sleeping in a sports bra and short shorts, leaving just enough to the imagination.<br/>“Regina?”</p><p>Regina jumped, had Emma caught her? Shit. Well, it’s not like she was going to ever see her again right? Maybe she should just get it over with, she found Emma attractive and was bound to make a move at some point…</p><p>“Your cat is your first pet. You… might be adopted. Sure, yes. And you used to strip, clearly you have the body for it. All true.”</p><p>She watched as Emma burst out laughing. “I can’t dance to save my life. But looks like we’re even Mills. Sure you’re not a super truth-finder too?”</p><p>Regina smirked, “I refuse to tell my secrets. Mind if I go back to sleep? I’m feeling tired again.”</p><p>Emma rolled over. “Sorry to keep you up. Good night Regina.”</p><p>A quiet thank you was heard before quiet sounds evened out.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Regina’s nose twitched at the first hint of coffee. A deep breath confirmed her suspicions that the dark liquid was being freshly made and that it was morning. The brunette snuggled down in her cozy pile of blankets, soaking up the last minutes of what had been a very deep sleep. When was the last time she had actually slept? Without pills or something to aide her on the countless nights where sleep had not come, as the sun would start to stream into her bedroom... or the various hotel rooms.</p><p>She sighed and poked her head out of her cocoon. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and went to stretch, banging her elbow into a wall that was closer than she thought.</p><p>She rubbed at her arm as she heard an intense debate begin in the kitchen.</p><p>“No, this is not for you.”<br/>“Meow.” <br/>“Look here, woman. You had your breakfast, we're not doing this again.”</p><p>“Meow.”</p><p>“No. The vet said you were fat...HEY, get your grubby paws out of here.”</p><p>Brown eyes crinkled at the adorable exchange.  She stood and ran her hand through her hair a few times. Should she go try and look presentable or should she go assist with the debate in the kitchen?<br/>She rolled her eyes, she didn’t need to do her hair. She did need some coffee though, the kitchen would need to win out over her vanity. As the brunette rounded the corner her eyes went wide.</p><p>Emma was standing at the stove, a skillet with eggs in one hand, and a cat floating above her head in the other.</p><p>“Why are you doing this?”</p><p>The cat looked over to Regina with a bored look. Every couple seconds trying her hand at swiping at air, hoping perhaps that some eggs might fly into her little mouth.</p><p>Regina cleared her throat and green eyes snapped to her.</p><p>“Oh hey! Uhm sorry if we were loud. This little ass-hole is on my last nerves…”</p><p>Regina smiled and walked over, reaching her hands out. Raising an eyebrow when the blond only stared at her.</p><p>“Give her to me.” Her fingers flexing in encouragement.</p><p>“Before you drop her on the stove.”</p><p>She didn’t wait for Emma to respond as she reached for the cat and settled her in a baby-hold in her arms, <br/>“Your mother being mean to you?”</p><p>The cat put on a show of being helpless and let out the most pitiful cry. Causing Regina to lift her to her shoulder and console her.</p><p>“Oh, I know baby girl. Let’s find those treats, you must have them around here somewhere…”</p><p>She looked at the blond expectantly.</p><p>Emma blew out a breath, “You can’t give in to her like that, she’s a terror.” After she realized she wasn’t going to win with these two, she turned her attention back to cooking and gave in, “Hall closet second shelf. Do NOT give her too many”</p><p>The brunette smiled and set the fluffball down, heading back the way she had come to find the treats.</p><p>Regina watched as Ginger raced ahead of her to show her the only closet in the hall. She pounded on it with passion and started letting out short sad cries.<br/>Brown eyes took in her shape. She could maybe lose some weight but she wasn’t a big cat by any means. No harm in giving her some treats.</p><p>She quatted to the little one's level and gave her some scratches.</p><p>“Ok, look here. Just a couple ok? I don’t want your mother yelling at me too.”<br/>Happy chirps and headbutts only increased as she reached for one of the double doors. As her eyes started to scan for some kind of treat bag her eyes slid to a poster tapped inside the door.</p><p>On the door was a woman in a skimpy black swimsuit. Dark thick hair, deep brown eyes, pouty smile. She was beautiful. She forgot what she was doing and froze. </p><p>The blond was plating the food when she noticed her cat's cries weren’t stopping. Ginger never carried on after getting food, she was always immediately distracted. She wiped her hands and walked to the hall only to find her guest staring at an image of herself, reaching for a treat bag, the action seemingly abandoned.</p><p>“I am so sorry. I told you I had a few photos lying around. It’s creepy I’ll take it down.”</p><p>Regina shook her head, her voice quiet.<br/>“She...she’s beautiful.” <br/>Her eyes lifting in surprise to see Emma there, she hadn’t really heard her enter the hall.</p><p>“I don’t look like that... anymore.” she pushed her hair behind her ear in a nervous gesture.</p><p>Her shoulders curved in and her chest trembled with emotion. She felt like she was about to cry until little paws pounded on her legs.</p><p>“Oh, I’m sorry, right. Treats.” She grabbed the bag and headed into the bedroom with the cat.</p><p>Emma wanted to follow but didn’t know what to say. She looked at the poster’s image in frustration. She should have remembered that was there. She made a mental note to rip it up and throw it away. She went back to the kitchen and took stock that her cat's cries had stopped. She must have finally gotten her treats.</p><p>She moved the food and coffee to the table, trying not to take notice as a certain brunette joined her at the table.</p><p>“Do you take cream, sugar, milk in your coffee? I think I have a little milk left…”</p><p>Regina shook her head.<br/>“No thank you. I take it black.” fingers wrapped around the warm mug in comfort.</p><p>Emma started eating when she heard a quiet voice.</p><p>“I’m not allowed to look like that anymore.”</p><p>Emma’s eyes looked up from her food, she was confused and didn’t want to steer the conversation the wrong way so she waited for a clue as to how to proceed. She was pretty good at sticking her foot in her mouth a lot of the time. </p><p>Regina took a sip of her coffee, letting the liquid work it’s magic, calming her slightly.<br/>“I didn’t… eat back then. I’m better now, about eating that is. I just wish I still looked like her…”</p><p>Emma dropped her fork, the clatter clearly startling the brunette.</p><p>Emma lifted her hands up in apology. “Sorry. I...I’ll take it down.” </p><p>Regina shook her head, “No there’s no need. I’m fine, it’s stupid. I just had a moment is all.”</p><p>Regina sipped her coffee feeling stupid for bringing it up. She didn’t need some random person to know she had an eating disorder. Her team had kept that from the public for years, just like her sexuality. This is why you didn’t open up to people because one wrong interaction and they are selling your secrets to every magazine they can find. Like her stupid ex-husband. Luckily she was able to push off the lesbian “rumors” as just a disgruntled spouse, but it still hurt that once she had trusted him and they had been close. He promised he would never let anyone hurt her, she had never even worried about that person would turn out to be him.</p><p>Emma stood and disappeared from the room. The brunette’s heart rate racing. Was she calling a paper right now? Was she about to take photos of her in no make-up, her hair a mess, in sweats for the world to laugh at?</p><p>But a few moments into her impending panic attack, she heard the ripping of paper. Something being opened, closed, and opened again.</p><p>The blond appearing again with her poster in her hands in shreds.<br/>“I forgot, the paper is recyclable… I probably should recycle it…”</p><p>Regina watched in shock as the image was thrown into the recycle bin.</p><p>“Why did you do that?” Regina asked, flushed in embarrassment.</p><p>Emma shrugged and turned on the tv, it was too quiet in here. </p><p>Regina’s stomach started to cramp in anxiety.<br/>“I’m sorry…”<br/>Emma waved her off.<br/>“It’s a stupid photo, don’t worry about it. Besides the real thing is right here.”</p><p>She looked like she was going to say something and held it back, then changed her mind and tried again. <br/>“I like this version of you better.”</p><p>Regina’s hand went to her stomach. She wasn’t sure if she was relieved or ill. If these were butterflies or anxiety nats. She nodded and tried to focus on her breathing when Emma drew her from her quiet meditation.</p><p>“Shit, Regina, we have a problem.”</p><p>She looked as her slightly pale completion was mirrored back at her in the already pale woman’s from face across the room.</p><p>Her stress started to evaporate as she looked at the pure horror on Emma’s face.</p><p>“What’s wrong?”</p><p>Emma’s eyes started darting around the room looking for something.</p><p>“Emma?” Regina’s normally deeper tone rose an octave.</p><p>Emma shoved a phone in her hands.</p><p>“You’re missing!”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Regina looked between the phone and the TV flashing her photo next to a decent sized reward for information about her whereabouts. She looked down at Emma’s cell phone in her hands.</p><p>Her eyes lifted to green ones. “I’m not going to get the money if I call myself in…”<br/>Her voice was a bit sarcastic as the blond was still panicking.</p><p>“Ha ha. You need to call someone. Like, check yourself in safe on Facebook… you know…”</p><p>Brown eyes squinted. “I was kidnaped, this wasn’t a natural disaster…”</p><p>Emma’s arms waved up and down gesturing to the tv.<br/>“People are going to think I kidnapped you!”</p><p>Regina served Emma a look. <br/>“Dear it’s not like I’m unconscious, I can speak for myself.”</p><p>Emma pointed at her phone. “Call someone. I mean it.”</p><p>Brown eyes rolled. She opened texts and started to type a number and a message.<br/>“Come take this back before I chuck it at your face.” she waved Emma’s phone at her.</p><p>The blond picked it up. <br/>“A text? Really? Who is going to believe that is actually you. Have you never seen a movie before? This totally says 'I’ve been kidnapped'...oh shit it’s ringing!”</p><p>The brunette almost dropped the phone as it was shoved back in her hands frantically. She tapped to answer and scooted the blond trainwreck from in front of her.</p><p>“Hey Kat, it’s me. Lost my phone…” she moved into the bedroom for some privacy.</p><p>“Regina what the hell! Where have you been? Are you aware there’s a national manhunt out looking for you? I swear your fans are going feral trying to ensure your safe return, which I am happy for by the way, but seriously you ditched during a convention?”</p><p>Regina pinched her nose as she could feel a headache coming on.<br/>“Could you please lower your voice, you’re giving me a migraine. I am fine, thanks for asking. I’m crashing with a friend, and no I didn’t skip out on work intentionally.”</p><p>She could hear her friend pause on the other line.</p><p>“Fine. I will calm down,” her clipped tone letting Regina know they would be talking about her flippant attitude later, “I’m calm. What happened?”</p><p>The brunette looked at Emma’s bed then to the doorway. Wondering if Emma would mind if she sat on her bed. Since the blond seemed easy-going, well, for the most part, she figured it would be ok to take a seat on the edge.</p><p>“I’m not sure Kat. I… I don’t particularly want to talk about it. I don’t know how I didn’t make it to the con. I woke up in the back of a car and it’s all so fuzzy…” Just trying to search her brain for more information about yesterday was causing her headache to spike. Everything from going to sleep at the hotel the night before to waking up in the back of a car was blank. Frustrated tears started to cloud her vision.</p><p>Katheryn’s voice got very quiet, Regina almost couldn’t make out what she said.<br/>“Say 'fairytale' if you're not safe.”</p><p>Regina’s forehead scrunched in confusion.<br/>“I’m sorry?”</p><p>Katheryn tried again and seemed more scared then frustrated now.</p><p>“Regina, where are you?”</p><p>It finally clicked, her friend thought she was kidnapped.</p><p>“Oh for god's sake Kat, I am fine. Hiding out at a friends. I’ll have her give you her address if you’re so worried…”</p><p>Before she continued Katheryn jumped in. <br/>“Good. Put her on.”</p><p>Regina looked at the closed door. She didn’t want to bother Emma anymore, but she knew Katheryn wouldn’t calm down till she had the address.</p><p>“Alright, then please relax. This is her number. I’ll go get Emma to give you the address. Then this, whatever you’re doing, stops. I am fine. I’ll work on getting a flight in a few days. I was just trying to decompress today alright?”</p><p>She found Emma sitting on the couch playing some video game.</p><p>“Emma?”</p><p>The game paused and green eyes looked up. A lot less startled than before Regina had gotten on the phone.</p><p>“This is my friend Katheryn. She wants to talk to you, get your address…”</p><p>The blond nodded and scooted over on the couch to make room for Regina. The brunette handed over the phone and sat down and reclined her head back. She was exhausted. Her best friend was type A and always had the tendency to freak out. She did really care about Regina though, which was more than could be said about...well anyone else in the brunette’s life.</p><p>She relaxed listening to Emma speak, and before she knew it, she was asleep.</p><p>When the brunette woke up it was close to noon and she had stretched out on the couch and the comforter that had been oh the bed in the bedroom was now snuggly around her slight frame.</p><p>Emma heard her shifting around and waited for her to wake up a bit more before she approached her.</p><p>“Hey, sleeping beauty. So I finished talking to Katheryn. We should probably get you to the doctor. Just to make sure you get checked out and everything. I should have thought of that sooner…”</p><p>Confused eyes stared back at her. “Emma I just have a few scrapes. They didn't need more than the bandaids I used yesterday… what?”</p><p>Emma was fidgety and kneeled on the floor. “Katheryn was worried that uh...stuff might have happened to you while you were out. It hopefully wouldn’t take too long? And then we can come back and be lazy all tonight.”</p><p>It took a moment but brown eyes finally flashed in recognition.<br/>“Oh. I… hadn’t thought about that either. I’m sure I’m fine ….”</p><p>Emma held up a hand.<br/>“Katheryn told me she would skin me alive if I didn’t get you to the doctor today. I’m slightly terrified based on some of the things she said… She’s never killed anyone before right? Ha ha.”</p><p>When Regina didn’t laugh at the last part Emma gulped.<br/>“Right?”</p><p>A tan hand patted her arm. “You’ll be fine. I suppose to ensure your safety, I could do a quick exam...afterall you have been very hospitable. One condition...I’ll need some sunglasses and a hoodie. I’m not causing a scene.”</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The wait had taken over an hour. Especially when Regina didn’t want to tell them what was wrong with her. There were looks from the intake nurse as she typed in Regina’s insurance number and Emma gave her a stern look. She didn’t want to get into a fight with anyone at the ER, but Regina was already nervous as it was, she didn’t need the paparazzi showing up.</p><p>Luckily the attendant caught Emma’s judging glance and correctly decided to not say Regina’s name out loud.</p><p>“I will get you a private room…” She dropped a couple of papers as she scrambled off to prepare, quickly returning and showing Regina the way. </p><p>The brunette turning when Emma didn’t follow, face uneasy. </p><p>Emma gave a reassuring smile. “I’ll be right here by the snack machine when you're done.”</p><p>Brunette hands clenched and she set her chin and nodded in determination. Following the nurse out.</p><p>Emma wasn't even at the snack machine long enough to decide on an option when the attendant was back hovering. </p><p>“Excuse me, Miss. Uhm, the woman you came in with is requesting I retrieve you…”</p><p>Green eyes went wide. “Ok, yeah. Uh, ok. I just, follow you?”</p><p>The petite woman nodded and guided her down the hall and off to a side room tucked away.</p><p>Emma knocked and after hearing nothing hesitantly entered.<br/>“Regina?”</p><p>She saw no one sitting in the chair but quickly found Regina sitting on the exam bench.</p><p>Eyes rimmed in red and nails digging into her palms.</p><p>“Woah, hey what happened.”</p><p>Emma quickly moved to her side and put an arm around her.</p><p>The brunette’s mouth opened to speak and she got frustrated when it took her longer than she wanted to be able to form a response.</p><p>“I don’t like hospitals. I’m sorry, you can go…”</p><p>Emma held her tighter.<br/>“It’s ok. I’m sorry I should have asked if you wanted me to come.”</p><p>She could feel Regina lightly shaking through her thick borrowed hoodie.</p><p>Regina leaned into Emma a bit more and let the feeling of another body ground her.</p><p>She had just started to relax when the doctor knocked and entered.</p><p>“Miss Mills? I’m Dr. Anderson. How are you? Seems you're not missing after all.”</p><p>Her smile was kind but Regina flinched a bit at hearing her name. She was used to more secrecy and protocol around a trip to the doctor. Besides the fact that she tried to avoid going as much as possible.</p><p>She leaned out of Emma’s embrace and started to kneed at her thighs. <br/>“I woke up in the back of a car yesterday and wasn’t sure where I had been…” she stopped and didn’t want to start again. She was not only frustrated with her lack of memory but suddenly worried that maybe something was wrong with her, hospitals always did that to her.</p><p>The doctor grabbed a stool and rolled over near the two women but not invading their space.</p><p>“Ok, I think I understand. We can do a standard rape kit, now it may take time to get results as we have a bit of a backlog…”</p><p>Regina shook her head. “I need to know today.”</p><p>The doctor looked apologetic. “Miss Mills, we will do everything in our power to get to yours quickly…”</p><p>Regina’s face strained. “I’ll pay whatever it takes, the whole line in front of me if I have to.”</p><p>The doctor’s shock was evident. “You want to donate to the backlog fund?”</p><p>Regina nodded. “Yes. Will that get my results sooner?”</p><p>The doctor sat back. “That would allow me to get to yours tomorrow yes. I could also expedite the bloodwork…”</p><p>Relief flooding brown eyes. “Done. I’ll give you my credit card number.”</p><p>The doctor nodded, “I will have someone grab the paperwork for you, and I will go grab some supplies. Just try and relax, this shouldn’t take too long. Bloodwork will take the longest. Should have you out of here in about thirty.”</p><p>When no questions were asked, the doctor was on her way.</p><p>Emma stood and Regina grabbed her hand quickly.<br/>“Where are you going?” her sentence a rush of quick sounds.</p><p>Emma lay her other hand on top of Regina’s.<br/>“Just out of the doctor's way. I’m not leaving...well unless you want me to go? But, Uhm, isn't this private?”</p><p>Regina released Emma and tried to shake her nerves.</p><p>Emma grabbed the waiting chair and scooted closer.</p><p>“Here, how about this. I can hold your hand and sit, backwards. That way I’m here but, ya know, not seeing anything.” She could feel a blush trying to light up her cheeks. She was sure Regina could see it any minute now. She didn’t want to think about the brunette without her clothes. This was not a good time, stop it Swan.</p><p>Regina’s face relaxed. “Ok. I should probably put a gown on?”</p><p>Emma nodded, flush still racing across her cheeks.<br/>“I’ll just, uhm, go stand in the corner.”</p><p>Regina changed and lay down on the bench,<br/>“I’m a child.”</p><p>Emma turned around and took up her spot on the chair.<br/>“Who does like the doctor's office? It’s not a problem.”</p><p>Regina blinked away angry tears. Her voice was raw.<br/>“What...what if something happened to me?”</p><p>Emma squeezed her hand.<br/>“It’ll be ok. It’ll get better.”</p><p>Regina tried to take a deep breath.<br/>“What if I’m pregnant?”</p><p>Emma’s eyes looked off to the side in thought.<br/>“Well, are you one of those people who would keep it?”</p><p>Regina shook her head, “What? Are you insane? Why would I keep it!”</p><p>Emma squeezed her hand again.<br/>“Hey, no one is going to make you. Relax.”</p><p>Emma tried again.<br/>“It wouldn’t be ideal, but you will be ok. Right?”</p><p>Regina took another breath. <br/>“Right. And no one would find out?”</p><p>Her eyes looked so hopeful and Emma’s heart broke.</p><p>“Not if I have anything to do with it. Want me to go back and scare the front desk lady again? She can spread the word…”</p><p>Regina smiled and shook her head.</p><p>Another knock was heard as the doctor reappeared.</p><p>The doctor smiled as she saw the awkward hand holding going on. Thinking she was going to be distracting from the situation, she started talking to her patient.</p><p>“So how long have you two been together? You two are adorable if you don’t mind me saying so.”</p><p>Both women tensed.</p><p>The doctor continued on. “Ok, I’m going to do a quick swab just relax. And I won’t tell anyone, your secret is safe with me. I didn’t tell my friends for months when I started seeing my new boyfriend either. You know how it is when your first marriage doesn’t work out. Alright, give me just another moment and we'll take some blood.”</p><p>Regina felt bad but stayed relatively quiet aside from answering whenever the doctor checked in with her.</p><p>“Alright, we are all set. Just a quick IV and we will get all your blood tests knocked out.”</p><p>Regina tried to release Emma’s hand but Emma seemed to grip it tighter.</p><p>“Emma, you can turn around now, I’m just getting my blood work. It’s fine.” Regina lightly tugged on her hand.</p><p>Emma nodded and turned around wondering if she was going to faint. Like she did in 9th grade, the last time she had some blood work done. It had been a while, but she remembered how everyone at her doctor's office had yelled and chastised her for not warning them that she was a fainter. Surely it would be fine if she wasn’t the one being poked.</p><p>Well...she was wrong.<br/>……</p><p>“Emma?” The voice sounded far away. A light was shining in her eyes.</p><p>“Emma, this is doctor Anderson. Can you open your eyes? We need to check for a concussion.”</p><p>Emma fought to keep her eyes open in the bright light.<br/>“Well, you seem ok, but no driving for you. Have your girlfriend drive home.” She turned to Regina who was finishing up her bloodwork with a nurse.</p><p>“If she seems lethargic, bring her back in. But her vitals seem to check out. Good thing you fell onto Miss Mills, she seemed to cushion your fall.“</p><p>Emma faced flushed under the attention.</p><p>“Miss Mills I will call you tomorrow with the kit results. Hopefully, we can get your blood work within an hour. We don’t have many ahead of you in line for blood work today. You go home and get some rest.”</p><p>Regina nodded her thanks and though Emma was standing she pushed her to sit back down while she got dressed.</p><p>She turned back around and put her hand out “Car keys?”</p><p>Emma shook her head. “I’m fine.”</p><p>“Emma I let you drag my ass to the hospital but I won’t be coming back anytime soon. Keys. Now.”</p><p>The blond grumbled but handed them over.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Regina had put Emma to bed when they returned home and had found herself pretty exhausted as well and didn’t stay up long past figuring out where Ginger’s food was, and watching a little tv.</p><p>She had gotten ready and snuggled into her makeshift bed. She had been so tired. But then of course, once she was under the mound of blankets, she couldn’t sleep. She grumbled rubbing at her eyes. Emma didn’t have a clock in the bedroom so she didn’t know how long she lay awake thinking. Boredom finally won out and she went to go make some coffee. As she stood there in the darkness, she heard the signs of raindrops tapping at the window and felt a slight chill as she went to peek outside. The sky was the most beautiful shade of dark purple, and the mood was completed as the soft sound of thunder rolled in the distance.</p><p>She looked around the room. It was not her usual style, but it was warm and felt safe. She felt safe here. She smiled sadly. She would need to leave soon she knew that. She had to get back to real life in LA and stop encroaching on Emma’s home and space. But when she thought about leaving she felt a throbbing in her chest. That was new. She knew she would leave and never speak to Emma again. It was for the best. Emma didn’t give her any indication that she would want to keep up contact and Regina didn’t want to assume. </p><p>She sighed and looked towards the bedroom. Emma was beautiful. She was kind and sweet and funny, ...and way too good of a person to be with the real Regina. </p><p>She heard the electric kettle go off and moved to make her coffee. As she waited for it to steep she heard a yawn from the other room. She saw Emma appear in the doorway rubbing at her face with a tiny wave. Her heart beat faster. Fuck, she was so beautiful. </p><p>Emma went to sit on the couch, “I couldn’t sleep either. Can I have some too?”</p><p>Regina cleared her throat of emotion, “Yes. One second, it’s almost done.”</p><p>She brought two cups over and set them on the end table, she was leaving soon. Maybe tomorrow. She should leave tomorrow…</p><p>Emma reached out and poked her in the hip when she didn’t respond to her name.</p><p>Regina was standing still. Her mind clearly lost in thought. Staring at Emma as if making up her mind. Fuck her and leave her, or...</p><p>And then she was moving. Her knees slipping to either side of Emma. the couch plenty deep for her to not tip backward. She reached for Emma’s confused face and brought her lips closer. She paused a moment before touching Emma. She knew why she was doing this. There wouldn’t be any calls after tomorrow, there would be no friendship. She was self-destructive. She would give Emma what she wanted and then disappear. Hopefully, Emma wouldn’t be another ex-husband, but then again…. she probably would. <br/>Regina glanced at Emma’s lips.</p><p>And as she hesitated Emma’s face lifted to meet hers. Softly. She didn’t force it, Regina almost didn’t feel it. She pressed into the kiss and felt Emma’s hand on the small of her back to keep her safe. Her heart clenched at the sweetness.</p><p>She pushed harder. Her tongue allowed entrance, her hands starting to wander. Emma’s hands slowing them.</p><p>“Can our first time not be on the couch, though?” Emma smiled shyly.</p><p>Regina’s breath shuttered. She needed to keep her mind straight. This wasn’t going anywhere. She wasn’t going to leave LA and move into some small apartment with Emma and her cat. She couldn't because she had work and obligations, appearances and money to be made and years to rush through too fast and be forgotten...</p><p>“Oh come on. I’m sure you’ve had fantasies about taking me many places.” Her voice was labored and had a tone she used for many of her troubled characters. This is what people found sexy. Her deeper tone, her dark eyes, hooded beneath her dark lashes, her boobs, her ass...</p><p>Emma grabbed her wrists as she went for Emma’s pants.</p><p>“Do you have a problem with beds?” Emma’s eyes searched hers in an effort to figure out why things seemed off. What was with Regina, is this how she just was with people? Was Emma just people? Of course she was…. Wasn’t she? Now didn’t really seem like the time to ask. </p><p>Regina shook her head, biting her lip, and gave Emma a good roll of her hips before quickly getting off.</p><p>“If that’s how you want me… I think it’s fair game.” She moved her hair behind her right ear again. Her nervous tic, and the only way Emma could tell she might not be as confident as she appeared. </p><p>Emma reached for her hand but Regina pulled her up quickly, attaching her mouth to a pale neck. <br/>“Come on Emma…” she husked into her ear, pushing her towards the bedroom and only stopping briefly to make sure Ginger was safely curled up on the floor before she pushed Emma down on the bed.</p><p>Emma was breathing hard but held a hand to Regina’s chest.<br/>“Are you ok? This seems a bit fast. I just want to make sure…”</p><p>Regina’s hand tried to slip down her pants.<br/>“You helped me. I want to repay the favor…”</p><p>Emma grabbed her hand, alarmed. “Excuse me?”</p><p>Regina rolled her eyes and moved her mouth to whisper into Emma’s ear.<br/>“Dear relax, I want you. This isn’t purely for your own enjoyment…I’m horny too...”</p><p>She moved back enough for Emma to see her face, “I’ve wanted to fuck you…”</p><p>Regina paused when she couldn’t decipher what she saw in Emma’s gaze. She hesitated. Maybe she was playing it a bit too rough? She tried to fight off her bouts of self-consciousness, trying to fight their way to the surface. No one wanted the real her… they wanted a version of her, a character. Which was fine, because Emma wasn't going to get the real her. Not during sex. She wasn’t going to get the slightly clumsy, slightly unsure version of who Regina Mills could be. </p><p>Emma smiled. The brunette took notice that it wasn’t cocky, it wasn’t hiding something. She looked, happy.</p><p>“That’s definitely a surprise to hear”. Her hand started to brush through Regina’s hair.</p><p>The brunette feeling goosebumps across her skull and neck.</p><p>Regina closed her eyes and hummed. She didn’t look Emma in the eye.<br/>“You’re beautiful Emma, how could I not want to?” A slip up she didn’t want to admit to herself. </p><p>She felt lips at her jaw, that started to trail down her neck. She was in control and playing her normal game only moments before, but now, she was now under Emma’s spell. She felt soft hands lightly scratch down her back, and encouraged her to come closer. She normally didn’t obey orders but she found herself letting the blond lead her.  </p><p>She scooted them toward the edge of the bed. Regina’s heart jumped into her throat when she felt like she was falling, Emma’s strong grip keeping her in her lap, her ass now hovering over thin air.</p><p>“You have a lot of clothes on for someone who wants to get off.” Emma’s voice was light and slightly amused. Her eyes were darker now, roaming all over Regina’s body, though they mostly stayed focused on her face. </p><p>Regina looked down at herself and smirked.<br/>“I suppose I do. Care to help me?” </p><p>Emma made sure Regina was balanced and then slowly ran her nails up under her shirt, finding no bra. Regina shivered. </p><p>She smirked, “Did you plan this?”</p><p>Regina shrugged a shoulder, “I had a feeling we might end up here. But my coffee brewing was not a late night ploy to get sex. Glad it worked, though.” She winked, inside she was holding her breath. </p><p>Emma lifted her shirt slowly but Regina couldn’t take the pace, and quickly pulled it over her head.</p><p>She tried not to think too hard about the fact that Emma was going to feel a less toned stomach than had donned the inside of her cabinet in that stupid poster. As her body image started to creep up on her she was considering hiding under the coverers, when soft lips connected a nipple. Burying her darker thoughts for now. </p><p>She gasped and quickly forgot wherever her brain had been.</p><p>Emma lifted her up and laid her down on the bed, Regina holding herself up on her elbows to keep her chest closer to the blond’s mouth.</p><p>Regina kept trying to reach for Emma but her hands were quickly held above her head.</p><p>The brunette’s chest started to rise and fall quicker, Emma took notice.<br/>“You ok?”</p><p>Regina nodded. “It’s good. I like it, promise.” she gave Emma a nod of approval to continue.</p><p>Emma gave her a look.</p><p>“Ok. Be good and keep them there.” she guided tan hands to the headboard. “Hold that for me.”</p><p>Emma kissed her way down the tanned body. Dipping her tongue into Regina’s belly button and gliding her teeth over a sensitive area of her lower stomach. Biting lightly at her hip bone. </p><p>A low groan was released as Emma squeezed a breast, increasing pressure.</p><p>“Lift your hips.”</p><p>Regina did and felt her pajama bottoms slowly pulled away, but her underwear remained on.</p><p>Emma worked her way back up to her brunette's face and started on her neck again, her hands slowly sliding under Regina’s panties, finding wetness. Regina’s eyes watching in excitement and need. She contemplated removing one of her hands from the bedframe.</p><p>“Emma, please. Just fuck me.” Her voice was desperate. </p><p>Emma looked up and paused. Staring at her underwear a moment before a swift movement of the underwear, her face falling behind her long hair. Regina’s head hit the pillow, eyes tight at the first feeling of Emma’s tongue running up her slit.</p><p>She hissed, cursed and dug her nails into the wood. Her hips started a rhythm, one her bed partner didn’t seem to mind. And then something that hadn't happened since Regina was young and unpracticed happened, she let out a high pitched squeak when Emma licked her clit. </p><p>Regina’s ears had heard it but hadn’t registered it. Suddenly, Emma’s face moved away from Regina’s pussy and a coldness rushed in. As her brain struggled to turn on again she opened her eyes, and saw shock on Emma’s face. Regina knew. It must have been her, and she was embarrassed beyond belief.</p><p>She sat up slowly and pulled her legs to her chest, hand covering her mouth, she didn’t want to cry, she didn’t…</p><p>A warm hand found her back and she shook her head.</p><p>Emma kept her voice low, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you...I-I don’t know what I did…”</p><p>When Regina took a deep breath and opened her eyes, the woman before her looked distraught.<br/>“I thought I was just using my tongue...I must have gotten carried away, did I use my teeth?” </p><p>Regina wiped away a tear. Light scratches started on her back, hesitantly.</p><p>“I’m really sorry Regina…” Emma’s face was flushed.</p><p>Regina leaned into the hand on her back.</p><p>“You… thought I was hurt?”</p><p>Emma’s face relaxed in confusion. “Uh, yeah… or, fuck is that just what you sound like? Cause if so that’s cool I just was uh, surprised. Your voice is deep, you know? And I just thought that sound was because I had messed up...did..yeah I ruined it, shit…”</p><p>She facepalmed and Regina smiled, she wasn’t being made fun of, at least she didn’t think she was…</p><p>“It’s, unfortunately, one of the sounds I make… I’m sorry if it’s not what you expected…”</p><p>Emma waved her hands frantically, “No, no no! It’s, it’s fucking hot if that’s not pain. I just, I’m an idiot…” She went to scoot back and didn’t realize she was so close to the edge of the bed and screamed like a little girl as she disappeared from Regina’s sight.</p><p>One minute Emma was on the bed falling, the next, she was on the floor. What was that scream? She laughed to herself.</p><p>“Dear what was that?” she couldn’t stop giggling. Had she ever giggled in her life? Definitely never during sex.</p><p>Blond messy hair popped up from the ground, eyes glaring, “Shut it Mills. I can’t believe you didn’t even try to save me.”</p><p>Regina’s smile was radiant as Emma climbed back on the bed, rubbing at her butt that had collided with the floor, hard.</p><p>Regina’s hands took the moment to slip through the distracted blond’s long smooth locks.<br/>“You scream like a little girl” she mused as she continued brushing through the hair in front of her face. Emma huffed.</p><p>Emma turned around and went to pull her hair into a ponytail.<br/>“No hair for you to play with. You’re mean.” She tossed the last bit over her shoulder with a pout.</p><p>Regina scooted closer, flush against Emma’s back, “Aw baby don’t be like that. I can make it all better…”</p><p>Emma’s breathing stopped when she felt Regina cup her breasts.</p><p>“Come on sweetheart, I didn’t mean to laugh at you. Let’s try again.” she bit Emma’s neck and the blond's head leaned back.</p>
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<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She thought they had gone to sleep early enough, but voices in the other room had her realizing she was far from the sleep her body craved today. In reality, it was probably making up for lost time. She flexed her legs and rolled her foot only to hear a disgruntled grumble.</p><p>She popped her messy head up and saw a cozy ball of fluff at her feet.<br/>“Sorry, Ging!” She whispered.</p><p>She heard talking again and now that she was a little more awake she was positive that the people were not on Emma’s tv and were in her house. The door was closed for once to the bedroom, making it harder to make out what they were saying. It sounded like Emma and another woman were trying to keep their voices down. Was it an ex?</p><p>“I’m sorry for just barging in…”</p><p>Yep definitely an ex. She smirked, how stupid would that woman, Emma was into women yes? Yes, and how would that woman feel seeing Regina Mills strutting out of Emma’s room? She would be devastated that her ex had bedded Regina Mills.</p><p>Regina removed herself from the bed without further disturbing her new best friend. She combed through her unruly hair with her fingers and fixed a smirk on her face as she moved down the hall swaying her hips.</p><p>She leaned against the doorway to the kitchen taking in the scene before her. Emma at the kettle, and some blond at the table… wait, was Emma into blonds? Her smirk faltered as the woman turned her head and their eyes connected.</p><p>“Oh. My. Gods. Why are you naked!”, and after a short pause and glance to the woman she had slept with “Regina, you dog!” Katheryn’s voice boomed.</p><p>Regina’s eyes went wide, casting a dark look at Emma.<br/>“What the fuck is she doing in your house?”</p><p>Emma's jaw dropped at seeing Regina and dropped the creamer she was getting for Katheryn--spilling it all over herself.</p><p>Katheryn started to cackle, as Regina rushed to put her hand over her friend’s mouth.<br/>“Kat! Shut the fuck up this isn’t funny!”</p><p>Katheryn was laughing so hard she was crying. When she started heaving from lack of oxygen she needed for this laughing fit, Regina released her.<br/>“Gods, I could fucking strangle you…”</p><p>Katheryn dabbed at her eyes, “Did any of that other stuff actually happen, Regina? Or were you just off banging this cute little thing?”</p><p>The younger blond turned bright red. And the older blond noticed the lightness in her friend’s eyes fading.</p><p>“Gina? Baby girl? You ok?” Katheryn’s voice took on the tone of a seemingly worried older sister.</p><p>Regina covered up her breasts.</p><p>“Can’t you leave?” Regina’s voice was pleading. Katheryn waved her off.</p><p>“There’s nothing I haven’t seen before, baby doll. Oh!” she tried not to clap in her joy, “You mean because you only want, Emma, to see you naked?” She pointed at the blond in question smiling like a Cheshire cat.</p><p>Regina threw her friend a nasty look and stomped back into the room to throw on sweats.</p><p>Emma blushed and Katheryn started on a long tale of how she once found Regina naked in a sink after a weekend bender. Emma listened patiently and at some point slipped a mug into Regina’s hands. The brunette glancing up in appreciation.</p><p>“So you’ll go back with me of course, I assume you have no other ride?” Katheryn apparently had stopped her embarrassing story a while ago and now was back to business.</p><p>“Wait Kat, how are you here? Why are you here?” Regina shook her head trying to make sense of things. One moment she was in Emma’s bed, happily naked, the next her best friend was here cock blocking her.</p><p>Katheryn reached across the table and put her hand on Regina’s.<br/>“Planes do fly to San Francisco dear.” she deadpanned but then grew emotional, “I needed to know you were ok, baby doll.” Her voice grew quiet, “You really scared me G.”</p><p>Regina’s stomach bottomed out. Of course, Katheryn would be worried about her, she always was. She gripped her friend’s hand.</p><p>“Kat, I’m ok, I’m not going anywhere.” Something Emma didn’t understand passed between them.</p><p>“I suppose I should get going. I have a mess to clean up back home I am certain.” She turned apologetic eyes to Emma.</p><p>“I…” She struggled to find what she wanted to say but the blond shrugged one shoulder like it was no big deal.</p><p>“It’s ok, no worries. I can’t take up all of your time.” Her smile was sad but hopeful. Regina wanted to tell her it would all be ok, that they would talk. That Emma would see her soon.</p><p>But that’s not how this was going to go, and she knew it.</p><p>“It was great, really. I enjoyed spending time with you, and getting to take a couple of days off from… craziness.” She smiled but it seemed that her mask was starting to slip back in place. She knew that must be what was happening when Emma’s jaw clenched as she tried to smile.</p><p>“If you wouldn’t mind, could I borrow these and have them sent back to you? I seem to be lacking any attire at the moment.” She tried a more genuine smile but the blond seemed keen to avoid her gaze now.</p><p>“It’s no trouble, keep them.” Her tone was slightly clipped and Emma berated herself for her feelings being so easy to read.</p><p>Katheryn however seemed oblivious.</p><p>“I am so sorry to cut this short but I figured this would be a quick trip. Emma dear you must teach me how you make your coffee in the future, it’s delicious! Perhaps when you visit?” she tried to pry.</p><p>Regina turned on her friend so fast, with a look of what the hell are you doing. Katheryn’s eyes challenged her friend and Emma cleared her throat.</p><p>“I’ll send you the recipe Katheryn.” Emma didn’t dislike the blond, but she knew a brushoff when she saw one, and Regina was doing the longest walk of shame there was.</p><p>Emma sighed and started to clean up, throwing the freshly made food in the trash, she felt ill now, she knew she wouldn’t be eating it. Regina noticed the gesture and stammered.</p><p>“Maybe we all could grab lunch?” Hopeful eyes implored Emma to forgive her. She didn’t know what she was doing. She was all over the place. She was going to just leave but she thought she would have more time. Time to maybe explain to Emma how she didn’t fit into her life and how she really did enjoy her company but things would never work. </p><p>The fakest smile was reflected back at her. “Perhaps another time? I really do have some errands to do today, the last few days I really had my hands full, as you recall.” Fuck why did she say that? </p><p>Regina felt nauseous. </p><p>“Of course dear. Some other time.” She started to fidget. Did she want to get Emma’s number just in case? So she could...apologize? </p><p>But even with all of her inner turmoil, she was walking with Katheryn to the door as Emma and Kat chatted politely until Katheryn’s hired driver pulled up. Regina was in the car well on their way to the airport, to Katheryn’s jet, before her friend spoke.</p><p>“G? Is she really a friend?” her voice was soft and searching. She first thought she was getting her friend out of danger, and then what seemed like an awkward situation. But if her friend’s mood was anything to go by, then maybe she had made a mistake.</p><p>Regina’s eyes burned “She’s just someone I met…”</p><p>Katheryn for the first time, felt like she had royally forked up.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Katheryn brought in a bag of groceries and slammed them down on the kitchen table in front of her friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“For the love of Lucy Lawless G, quit with the moping!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>For the first 24 hours they had been home, Regina had more or less shut herself in her room. But after Kat wouldn’t leave her alone she had moved to the kitchen to listen to her friend talk at her while she cooked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not moping. I don’t know what you are talking about…” She propped her head on her hand and looked straight at her friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn eyed her as she pulled bowls down from a cabinet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t think I didn’t see the end of a coke line in your room honey.” Her blue eyes flashed in challenge, one her brunette friend was too down to fight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kat…” she sighed exhausted, she didn’t need a lecture right now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can’t we just eat dinner and move on with our lives…my tests all came back fine, by the way, the doctor called” brown eyes traced the lines on the light wooden table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kathryn shoved her phone into tanned hands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m glad to hear that. But just call the girl. Clearly you miss her.” She moved back to her food prep as her friend rolled her eyes, setting her phone down a little harder than necessary on the table. Causing the blond to grumble.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry. And I can’t, remember? You rushed me out of there and I didn’t even get her number.” She moved a hand into her hair and dug her nails in, self-loathing was something she was familiar with and knew she had to be sneakier to hide it from her best friend who had known her forever.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn stirred for a moment, “Regina… you make it sound impossible.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s eyes flashed in warning, “Kat, knock it off. Or I’m going back in my room and you won’t get to judge what I do, or like it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her chest tightening in annoyance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The blond sighed and wiped her hands, walking over to wrap her arms around her friend.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Gina. You know I think you need to slow down with the numbing, it gets scary sometimes… I just don’t want to walk in and find you…” her voice started to choke up with emotions from a night she tried to forget. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina squeezed her back, “You won’t Kat. I told you I’m fine. And maybe I miss her a little. But I’m not going to show up at her house and ask for her number. I’ll seem… psychotic.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn smiled and kissed her friend’s head, she ruffled up brunette hair until she got a protest. She laughed and walked back to the food she was prepping.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina. That wouldn’t be psychotic… but if you recall…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Nervous brown eyes snapped up as her friend smirked motioning to the phone on the table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You did text me. From her phone.”</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Dark eyes nonchalantly slid to the phone in front of her.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>After dinner, Regina had kidnapped Katheryn's phone and debated texting Emma from it. But then decided that was silly Katheryn had helped her get a new phone and she could use her own.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She carefully dialed the digits into her contacts and took the time to find a cat that looked just like Ginger online to make Emma’s image a little more personal. She knew she had a stupid grin on her face, one that even her anxiety and anti-depressant medications couldn't produce. She knew she had upset Emma when she left but they did have moments when she was with Emma, she was confident that contacting her again would fix everything. She debated for a long time what to say. She typed a few different messages out but nothing felt right. She lay back on her bed with her phone floating in front of her face. She must have been like that for a while as she could feel her fingers start to go numb and her phone slipping. She knew it was moments away from smacking her in the face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her door opened and a head peeked in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey, baby doll. You text your cute hook up yet?” When she saw how distraught her friend was she came in and tried to look innocent as she wandered around her room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes rolled. “I haven’t taken anything Kat. I’ve just been sitting here like an idiot. She would want me to contact her, right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat looked at the pools shining back at her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat let out a breath she had been holding and crawled across the bed, scooting in behind her friend and pulling her up into her arms.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course she would, babycakes. She seemed like a sweet girl.” A kiss was laid on Regina’s soft hair.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But what if she doesn’t like me, Kat… the real me…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The blond squished her tighter. “She already met the real you sweetheart.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina shook her head sadly, “No, she met a version of me…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn’s eyes went wide and as she stroked Regina’s hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Were you playing the Evil Queen again? Ava?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Palms pushed into tired eyes, “I don’t even know Kat. I must have, right? If she liked anything about me…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn shushed her. “Hey, you don’t get to talk like that anymore. Remember? I love you. Fuck your mother. And that no good ex-husband.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina snuggled closer. “I don’t know how you can love me…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat paused her hands, “Regina, you have the biggest heart, you can be so funny…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina didn’t know how to love very well, she didn’t know how to actually believe compliments and caring words. Her mother had messed her up early on and her career didn’t help. One moment your fans love you and worship the ground you walk on, and the next they are tearing you apart.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn nudged her friend, “Give her a chance. I don’t know for sure, but maybe she could be different. You certainly seemed confident around her when you were naked.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes looked up at her friend, “You weren’t supposed to be there. Worst vag block ever…” she grumbled, starting again to look at her phone screen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat got more comfortable in the pillows.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just let it come from your heart. Tell her how you feel and just be honest. That’s all you can do sweetheart.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She moved her hand to try and stifle her yawn. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Scoot over I am passing out in here, my bed is too far away.”</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Katheryn was singing when she heard her friend plop into the kitchen chair the next morning. Promptly killing her buzz.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Blue eyes rolled. “Morning sleeping beauty, it’s 11AM. Did you want some dinner with your breakfast today?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina picked up an orange from the fruit bowl and angrily started ripping it open.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I stayed up all night just waiting for my phone to go off. It never did.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn shoved a bowl of pancake mix in front of Regina and the woman started stirring angrily. Kat walked into the brunette's room and found the phone on the dresser, abandoned. There was no way the blond wouldn't have responded. She could hear Regina start shouting at her from the other room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s fine, she’s probably off selling details of our sordid night together to any fucking mukrag there is out there. I shouldn’t be bothered right? I knew it was just a hookup. Everyone wants to fuck the evil queen. Maybe you were right, maybe I was myself and that was so wildly different from what she imagined getting herself off on my fucking photo at night. It’s fine. I’m fine. I can get any fangirl I want to fuck me, I don’t need her. She’s not so great with her stupid cat, stupid green eyes, and her shitty clothes and her dingy apartment…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The apartment that felt safe. The stupid cat that had chased her nightmares away. The stupid cunt was beautiful. She would just need a hotter rebound. Yes, that was it, someone to make Emma jealous. Maybe finally come out of the closet and step out with Miley Cyrus’s ex Stella whatever, maybe Ruby Rose, was she still single…she would check Raya...</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn stood in front of her looking down at her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can tell you are mentally destroying someone with your mind. Your vein is showing your highness.” Kat pointed to her own head where Regina’s vain would normally be.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette’s phone was placed in front of her, face up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What… it’s blank.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked at Kat for a clue as to what this was supposed to mean. The blond gazing into the pancake mix, satisfied with her friend's anger management project.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s dead.” she deadpanned and picked up the bowl when Regina flew out of her chair, knocking a good bit of the contents into her friend's face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What!” She didn’t even take in Kat’s wet, caked face as she flew to her room to look for her new charger.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She reappeared as Katheryn was wiping off her face. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I can’t find my charger. Have you seen my charger? Can I use yours? Where is yours?” It all came out in a rushed string of words. Leaving the blond smiling at her friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mine is right here, plugged into the wall. Just relax lady.” She knew Regina to get like this every time she landed a new acting role that she was super stoked about, but she had never seen Regina act with such passion over a woman before. A woman she had just met at that.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s hands were shaking with nerves as she tried to get the stupid charger to want to connect with the butt of her phone. Pale hands taking over for her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her nerves felt like they were on fire as she waited for the phone to charge, anxiously bouncing on her heels until her friend placed a hand on her shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“G, take a breath. Did you take your meds today? You seem a bit …”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes didn’t leave the phone. “No, I didn’t want to mix them with the coke. You were scary the last time I did. I wasn’t sure If it was safe yet…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Blue eyes crinkled at the self-preservation she was starting to instill in her friend. It was why Regina had moved in with Katheryn on a permanent basis after all. Regina had a hard time coping with her fame and on a bad night things could get… bad. After a particularly scary night Regina was hauled out of her condo to Katheryn’s house and after a very broken Katheryn begged her to slow down, she agreed that she shouldn’t be alone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And honestly, with Katheryn she didn’t really feel so alone, but Katheryn did have her own life, a fiance that she put on hold for her unstable friend. A career that had to stall every time Regina had an “episode”. She loved Katheryn but she couldn’t help wondering if loving her was toxic. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tried to shake her thoughts. Katherine didn’t think she was toxic, just hurting. She had tried to reframe that in Regina’s mind time and time again. Regina took a moment to remember to offer Kat a reassuring smile. She didn’t want her to worry. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her phone reached ten percent and she turned it on, her friend starting to finally cook their pancakes. She waited impatiently as her phone updated all of its late notifications. She had pings for Instagram, her fans all tagging her in posts of well wishes since her disappearance. She had new posts from friends, messages from old coworkers wanting to collaborate on nonprofit work….</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her fingers furiously updating everything, searching her phone in vain. She looked at her call log for a 5th time before the tears started to roll. She pushed it down, hard as she could. She didn’t get her hopes up, she was Regina motherfucking Mills. She didn’t do 'lovesick'. Woah, lovesick? She needed to get laid more if that’s what one night with a pretty girl was doing to her now.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She closed her eyes and focused on grounding herself. What were 5 things she could hear…?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, so what did she say?” a sizzling sound lifted above the silence as a pancake was flipped.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Reluctant fingers clicked the phone back into darkness. Her back going straight as to not show any weakness.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s not a big deal.” She moved to get juice out of the fridge.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her friend set a pancake safely on a waiting plate, stretching to grab the brunette’s phone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You sound so subdued, she for sure didn’t send a nude then…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina set the juice down as Kat flicked on the screen, moving to her friend’s texts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina poured. Her hands were a lot steadier than she felt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She didn’t write back Kat. Can we let this go now?” she felt her walls coming up. She had compartmentalized most of her childhood, but since she had Kat in her life, it seemed ever harder to shove things into her mental box and close them away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Green eyes scanned the phone like there must be some mistake. Looking between the lack of new messages and her friend.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No… there’s no way! She was smitten with you…” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Full lips twitched into a small smile, “I didn’t cast a spell Kat, she obviously wasn’t into it…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>*ding*</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat’s face shifted into a shit-eating grin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ew Kat, uh uh. What’s with your face? It looks like when Fred sends YOU a nude. That is my phone... “</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn turned the phone and handed it to her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, I think you’ll want to see this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina took it unenthusiastically and started to read. Her eyes bugging out one sentence in, doing a double-take of the sender.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Looks like your little romance wasn’t over yet. Do remember to invite me to the wedding dear.”</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Hi Emma, it’s Regina. I took your number from Katheryn’s phone. I hope that was alright? I would love to see you again. Maybe we could work something out? 10:57 PM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Oh wow, hi! Totally ok. How are you? I’m kinda shocked you texted me from your own number or is the number you use for all your women ;) ? 11:03 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Ha ha. This is my real number...so don’t uhm share it please, keep it just between us? 11:04 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Regina you don’t have to worry about me, I would never. I get it, privacy is important to you, I can respect that. I mean I might tell Ginger, but no one would understand her if she tried to tell them… :) 11:05AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: I miss her! How is she? Are you treating her well? And I think I can make an exception. 11:05 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Awesome--so I told her. She meowed. Not sure what that means. I think she’s happy to hear from you too. Probably wondering if that means treats in celebration--we might have some. 11:06 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Hearing from me is a cause for celebration? I’m glad. I was worried... with how I left. I know we haven’t really known each other long but … 11:08AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: I feel the same :). I missed you. Is that weird? 11:08AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Not at all. So am I going to see you again or are you just going to lead me on with super cute messages? 11:10 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Oh I haven’t even begun to flirt, Mills, just wait ;) And seeing you again would be great. Are you coming into town soon? I have a decently flexible work schedule. I just have to know when to take off. 11:11 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Unfortunately I am stuck in LA for a while. What do you say to coming to visit me? I live with Katheryn but I am sure I could get the house to myself for the weekend. She’s always looking for an excuse to stay at her boyfriend's. 11:15 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Oh...I would love to, but I don’t have a bunch of money right now, and rent is coming up at the end of the month. How long till you come to SF again? My car is pretty old Idk if she can make it all the way to you :(. 11:17 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: If you can get off work don’t worry about the plane ticket. I can cover it, I have plenty of air miles. So in reality, I wouldn’t even be paying for it… 11:18 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: If you are sure? When would you want to see my cute face again? 11:18 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina smiled and tossed her hair laughing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: How about next weekend? 11:19 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Done. I didn’t have anything slated for then yet anyway. Are you thinking I fly in on Saturday morning and out Sunday? 11:20 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina felt anxiety in her stomach. She wanted Emma for as long as she could get her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: How about Thurs night through Sunday? Would that be acceptable? Do you have an airline preference? 11:22 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: LOL airline preference? No. Whatever you think is best/have miles on. And Thurs-Sun sounds amazing :) 11:23 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Great! I will book the flights and send you the details.  11:23 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And she debated adding it on, but she did anyway.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R:  And I can’t wait to see you too. 11:24 AM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina closed her phone and opened up her laptop. She had plenty of miles on quite a few airlines but decided on Virgin. She snorted, ironic. She booked business class and sent a confirmation number to Emma via text. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She suddenly felt the need to get into shape. She looked at her very slightly protruding stomach. That would not do. Emma was going to get the best of her. She quickly changed and moved downstairs to their small gym. She got on the treadmill and started to run, and run. Kat came down and made her break for lunch and was shocked when her friend didn’t even hesitate to eat a full meal, which was unusual.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina smiled and was upbeat discussing next weekend's plans with her friend.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you good with staying at Fred’s? Not that you have to leave…” Her eyes looked guilty but Kat quietly squashed her fears.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Baby doll, I love you but I don’t need to see you naked again so soon. Fred will be thrilled he’s been begging me for a weekend for a while.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s look turned contemplative. She had often struggled with voicing her feelings but Kat was generally easy to talk to. She felt secure in their friendship, which had taken a lot of time and work on both of their parts. Katheryn was the person who came into her life and never gave up on her. And she often wondered what she brought to Kat’s life.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not ruining your life am I?” Her voice was filled with lightly veiled emotion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn took her hand, “G I want to be there for you. I love you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina sniffled as she held back a tear, frustrated with her telltale signs of emotion.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re always taking care of me, and… I shouldn’t need you to…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat rolled Regina’s hand over and pointed to a tattoo down on her inner wrist.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What is that symbol?” Knowing well what the answer was.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Protection…” Regina smiled and brushed a tear away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who went with you to get that tattoo? Who held your hand as you destroyed mine in a death grip? I told you. It was a promise. I’m here Regina. You do belong somewhere. And eventually, more people are going to see you the way I do.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s chest heaved, “I’m still not better yet…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“None of us are, but you are doing so well G. Be patient with yourself. “</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded and went back to mindlessly eating. Feeling vulnerable she switched topics.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Emma couldn’t afford the flights here so I am getting them for her. Think I should help her with her rent? She mentioned she has a payment coming up and they say SF is super expensive…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you going to talk it over with her first?” She knew once Regina was on a mission there was almost no talking her out of it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, I don’t want her to know it was me… in case she’s not happy. I want to do it…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her friend nodded as Regina wandered off to make her call.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Pride -- double update :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Emma had gotten a friend to come crash with Ginger for the week, even though she considered asking Regina if she could bring her. Then again, she didn’t know how her baby would act on a plane and with the whole airport mess, so in the end, her baby received a good staycation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma hopped in a Lyft Regina had insisted on sending to get her to the airport and she was nervously bouncing in her seat, but noticed the rainbow decor of the car.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Where are you off to chica? Hot date?” The driver was Latina and very attractive, she reminded Emma of Poppy in the L Word.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Actually yes, I am so nervous though I haven’t seen her in 2 weeks. I’ve never...traveled for a girl before you know?” She fidgeted with her phone and offered a polite smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The darker woman waved it off “Chica, she is one lucky gal. I would sweep you up if you were still on the market. Damn Bonita. Let me know if the cutie has a sister ok. My IG is @LAtinBayBay ya know just in case.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma smiled and plugged the name into her account. This was going to be a fun weekend.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>……………………………</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina started off her Wednesday in a fog. She was hyper fixated on having everything she would need for the weekend. She got waxed, Her hair cut and some balayage highlights to frame her face, then worked her ass off in the gym. She didn’t look like the poster. Her ribs weren’t showing and her cheekbones weren’t as prominent, but she had to admit, if she wasn’t aware she was looking at herself, she would jump that chick in a heartbeat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The thought made her smile. Emma had wanted her two weeks ago, and though she didn’t have the tightest muscles, she had a feeling Emma would be down for her anyway. It made her chest warm. She was feeling good and posted a selfie on her socials, excited to get some fan love as well.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Thursday morning she received a text from Emma asking what to bring for the weekend and Regina was vague, wanting to see if she could get the blond into some of her own clothes. She ran out to a lingerie store and picked out some particularly racy pieces she hoped would come in handy. She grabbed a green smoothie at Starbucks and headed home. But as the time drew nearer, She started to freak the fuck out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat found Regina smoking outside, taking into account the billowing smoke, the brunette was getting quite high.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat knocked on the patio door loudly before sliding it open and approaching confused.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey baby doll, you know you have to pick her up in two hours? Besides didn’t you tell your fans you quit smoking? What if someone snaps a pic?” Kat crossed her arms and wondered if she shouldn’t leave for Fred’s just yet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes lazily rolled to her friend.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Puh-lezzz, it's not like it’s a cigarette,” She waved the offending joint around the air. “Plus. There is plentyyy my fans don’t know. One more thing isn’t going to hurt them. They love me right now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Blue eyes searched her friend's face, her eyes were slightly unfocused.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you need me to pick Emma up? What are these? 2nd date jitters?” her tone was slightly annoyed. She hoped Regina wasn’t about to self destruct, like she usually did. She was doing so well since Emma and her had started talking again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette’s phone buzzed. “Kat I got this. I’ll just send a car, she’ll get here safe and sound and I’ll be chill by the time she gets here. OMG did you see this? Someone thought I was pregnant a month ago! What the hell...at least they think I look good now…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A blond hand snatched the phone right from under her nose.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hey!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat flipped through the comments. “You gotta stop with the social media, it’s not good for you babe. There. I turned off notifications AND disabled it, leave it off for the weekend. You’ll thank me later” she turned with a wink.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette looked down at her body once more in scrutiny. Did she look as good as she thought? Was she having some kind of bipolar anorexia stint? Did she think she looked good but in reality she was way off? She looked to make sure Kat wasn’t looking then she checked her stomach. Feeling and pinching, and giving up and taking another hit. There was nothing she could do now anyways, well nothing that would gain her friend's approval. And she didn’t trust herself if she went back inside at the moment. So she sat down and dipped her feet in the hot tub and proceeded to get high as fuck. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She had gotten a text from Emma that she had landed and quickly flew in the house to pop some Adderall to become more alert.  She sent a car and started to pace as she waited for her drugs to kick in. She knew something wasn’t great when she ended up in a cold shower to try and numb herself to the back and forth effects of the weed and meds. It didn’t really work. And her heart froze when Katheryn opened her bathroom door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina? Babe. You ok?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina lay her head against the cold tile. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck fuck fuck.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m fine… just sobering up.” she tried to keep her voice steady and found it wasn’t as hard as she thought. Even as her heart rhythm felt weird, was she having a heart attack? Did she need her Xanax? Fuck. That was in Katheryn’s room from the last time she abused it. Her friend kept it well hidden for emergencies.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She wasn’t going to bother Kat though, the blond was going to have a nice weekend with her boyfriend that she didn't get to see much anymore, and she herself was supposed to have a good weekend with Emma. Oh no Emma…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, that’s good to hear because Emma is here. Do you need anything before I take off?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her voice sounded unsure so Regina put on her best annoyed tone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kat I don’t need a babysitter. I am fine. Go have a good time with Fred.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She knew her friend hadn’t closed the door and wasn’t even surprised when she heard her again, “Maybe I’ll see if Emma can help me make some coffee…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Then the door finally clicked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She could do this. She could face Emma. She would be fine, she couldn’t mess this up on the first night, even she wasn’t that talented. She had just gotten a little high. Maybe if she came clean that would smooth over the night. She held onto that thought as she tried to get ready. Her hands were too jittery for eyeliner so she went without, Emma had already seen her without makeup anyway, and told her she was beautiful. Suddenly the realization hit her that Emma was currently sitting in her kitchen having coffee. She scrambled to put on the sweatpants she had stolen from Emma and a dark workout tee.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She got to her door and tried to wipe her sweaty palms down her pants. She closed her eyes and sent out a wish to anyone that would listen to let this time be different. Then she ventured out of her safe space.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma was facing her when she entered the kitchen reading something on her phone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi..” Regina nervously took a seat across from her and noticed Emma had made her coffee as well.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A smile broke out across her face, “Thank you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her blond smiled, though her nose wrinkled a bit. “Did you guys have a skunk die outside? I swear I keep getting whiffs of it. I had one die under my apartment last year, it was tragic. My landlord didn’t believe me and it took them two whole weeks to deal with it…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s smile turned uneasy. She should tell Emma the truth...but she could also wait.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I should call someone then, before it gets too bad. Hopefully it can hold off until Monday?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She gave Emma a fake smile which instantly had the opposite effect. Emma started to feel uneasy.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah...sure.” she looked around feeling like she had said something wrong and tried again, “You and Katheryn’s house is lovely, it didn’t smell that bad I just have a sensitive nose. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said anything…” she was stumbling and she noticed Regina was fidgety as well.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t regret me coming do you? Now that I’m, like, here?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s slightly unfocused eyes went wide. “Emma no! I am so happy you’re here, I’m just… nervous I guess.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s smile returned and then her posture finally relaxed. “Ok, thank god. So what do we have planned for the weekend? Hiking? Sightseeing? A beach that is actually warm?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s panic grew at every suggestion. Shit, people did normally plan things to do for a weekend away. She hadn’t even thought of that, she was too concerned with her vanity and how Emma would see her. She wasn’t focused on what they would be doing? Well aside from sex, there would be sex again, right? This was a second date but they had already hooked up, shit, she should have looked up the rules for dating again…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I-I well…” she looked around the room as if that would answer some of her questions, but all that did was make her dizzier, and slightly nauseous. She really shouldn’t have had any of the coffee…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina put her head in her hands in the universal sign for headache and Emma rose to move to Regina’s side.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey are you sick?” She sweetly ran her hand through Regina’s hair. The smell from earlier was slightly stronger, she wanted to ask but chose to ignore it for now.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded her head pinching her nose, “I’ll be ok. Just a slight headache, too much coffee.” She offered a weak smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“On second thought...maybe I should lie down…” she went to stand and wobbled slightly. Emma catching her elbow.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m down to snuggle. Which room is yours?” Regina let Emma link her arm through hers and she guided her back to her bedroom.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma pulled back the covers and gestured for Regina to get in. The woman would have blushed or argued that she didn’t really need the nap, but she was feeling horrible.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When her head hit the pillow she sighed. She felt her bed dip and a body scoot closer, arms wrapping around her waist. She nestled back into her big spoon and was out within minutes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When she woke again she didn’t feel any better. She was lucky Emma had rolled in her sleep to the other side as she quickly threw off the covers and bolted for the bathroom. Emptying anything in her stomach into the ceramic basin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She wiped her mouth and quickly went to rinse her mouth with mouthwash just in case the blond tried to come in. She flushed and started to inch back into the bedroom when she saw a flash.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked up and Emma was on her phone, at just the right angle to snap a photo.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina was instantly enraged, “The fuck do you think you’re doing?” She bellowed. Emma’s eyes snapping up as if she hadn’t heard Regina return.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m taking some stupid quiz, what is up with you? Don’t yell at me!” Emma was slightly scared at Regina’s whirlwind emotional rollercoaster today and waiting for some sort of explanation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina advanced way too quickly, “Give me your fucking phone, I cannot believe you!” the level of her voice not coming down one bit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma pulled her phone closer, “You have no right to go through my phone.” Her glare was hard and unmoved. What the hell was happening.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina laughed darkly and walked as if she was going to go back in the bathroom then promptly turned.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She started to remove her clothes in anger. “This what you want?! You want a fucking nude that will get you a couple hundred bucks? Advice tits are worth $200, ass is $300 and for a full fucking nude of mine you better ask for a lot more because not one has ever leaked!” She was struggling to take her bra off but finally got to it, ripping her underwear as she tore that too from her body.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Here I am! Expose me. Fucking do it!” She was hyperventilating and was her face growing sticky… and wet?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma set her phone down and put her hands up in surrender, horrified at the outburst. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Woah, did you think I was taking a photo of you? Why would I do that? I told you I understood being with you meant privacy…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina snapped, “One decent lay does NOT mean you are with me. I flew your ass up here for sex. Nothing more. Did you think I gave a fuck about you? I don’t. Clearly the feeling is mutual!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma stood and reached out for the brunette’s arm like she was approaching a terrified wild animal.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey...”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t touch me!” Regina flung herself back against the wall, raising her arms in defense, sliding down to the floor, balling herself up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma recoiled and searched the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m calling Katheryn…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She heard sobbing start as she left the room, finally feeling like she could take a breath. She found Regina’s phone but it was locked. Shit. Was she supposed to leave? Wait! She had Katheryn’s phone number! She ran to get her phone and quickly dialed. The phone went straight to voicemail. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Fuck.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tried a text.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>E: </span>
  <em>
    <span>Katheryn, what the fuck is going on with her right now? I am freaked out. I’m leaving. I didn’t sign up for this. I don’t know what is wrong with her, but I ...I can’t. Please, when can you come back? I don’t think it’s safe to leave her alone…</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma waited but there wasn’t an immediate response. She stayed in the other room for over an hour. Regina didn’t come to yell at her for not leaving but she felt like her presence was no longer welcome. She texted her own best friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>So my weekend just turned to shit…</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She sat down and took a deep breath. Maybe she could leave her like this for Katheryn to find? Maybe this was normal? She didn’t know any celebrities personally, well not except in a friend of a friend kind of way and they had never been known to act like this.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She couldn’t leave until Katheryn got back, wasn’t that the responsible thing to do? What if Regina choked on her own vomit? Shit, she had seen her more than an hour ago. She rushed back to the brunette's room and when she opened the door she saw the woman still naked, still on the floor, and very much asleep.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma sighed and lightly tapped her head against the door, she looked so helpless. She would stay until Katheryn came home. Then she was out of here. She saw Regina’s body shiver and moved out of instinct to pull a blanket from the bed over the woman. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She took the time to tuck her in, as she was scared of being injured if she tried to move her, but every time she moved Regina whimpered in her sleep. She lightly started to stroke her hair.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What in the hell is going on with you…” She continued for a while until she too laid down on the floor, a respectable distance, and nodded off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When she was roused from sleep she felt a hand lightly shake her shoulder, when she rubbed at her eyes it was darker, early evening. She gazed up into troubled brown eyes. The brunette gripped the blanket around her shoulders.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Did...did you take a photo of me?” Her eyes were so sad and her voice again quiet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma stretched out her neck shaking her head. “No. I didn't. Maybe the light from the window reflected off of my phone? I can show you my phone if you want.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina placed her hand on Emma’s retrieving her phone. “It’s ok… uhm. But if you did I would understand...a photo of me can be worth a lot of money…” She shrugged looking at the floor.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma scooted closer so Regina could see her unlocked phone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is my photo gallery. I can show you my social media pages, I didn’t post anything…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina hated that her eyes scanned the phone even though she knew Emma’s voice must be telling the truth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When they finished going through everything possible. Regina gave Emma an awkward kiss on the cheek. “Thank you… for showing me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded, setting her phone down. “Has the photo thing happened to you a lot? With your women?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s head bobbed up and down. “No one was bold enough to take a full nude but I could definitely pick out which ‘Regina Mills boobs and ass photos’ on the internet are real, you know?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma shook her head in disgust, “Ass holes.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina scooted closer and then felt Emma stiffen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So you only invited me here for a booty call? Surprised you would only send for a ‘decent’ lay, figured you could have your pick…” Emma’s temper was showing but she tried to keep it in check. She wasn’t just some piece of meat, she was a real person with real feelings. If all Regina wanted was to be fuck buddies, she might have even been down for that, but the women kept her in the dark. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina glanced between Emma and the door and kept her eyes elsewhere while she spoke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry for my behavior. It was extremely unkind. That’s...not the reason I invited you up--not entirely. Did I think we were going to spend a lot of time having sex, yes. But I also knew I just felt like something was missing since I came back and I guess I shouldn't have gotten high…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyebrows rose, “That smell was you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regina flushed red and cleared her throat, “Yes. I got quite blazed earlier today…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s face scrunched in confusion, “Doesn’t pot make you mellow? You were like… I don’t even know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina felt her belly cramp. “I may have popped some Adderall… since I was so out of it, I-I wanted to be present with you…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A deep breath was released as Regina let her head fall back to the wall.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I fucked this up didn’t I.” she left no room for debate. She knew she did.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for staying. I am still a bit hazy but it’s much more manageable now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma scooted closer and bumped Regina’s shoulder, “I had to make sure you didn’t die…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s blood went ice cold but started to thaw as Emma gently intertwined their hands. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think I can still get you a flight home tonight..” Regina went to stand and realized she was still naked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She was about to say fuck it, it didn’t matter anyway when Emma spoke up. “Well, I assume you won’t be mixing medications anymore, this weekend?” She said the last part hesitantly, she didn’t know Regina yet and did not have authority over what she put in her own body. And from what she knew of the other woman already, she didn’t want it to come off as some kind of challenge.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina let the blanket drop and moved to get dressed, letting a sliver of hope propel her forward.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you saying you’ll be staying, if I am on my best behavior?” her chest lightly fluttering at the thought.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She jumped slightly when arms lightly draped around her waist. “I think I can stay another day. She started to kiss Regina’s neck and the brunette chuckled and lightly pushed her away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then let me get dressed you moron, so we can go make dinner.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma complained lightly, but when her stomach rumbled she reluctantly let go. “Fine, I guess we should eat.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina slipped on a swimsuit as it seemed easier, “Tie me up?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes went wide at the seemingly intricate display on top of warm skin.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Or I could take it back off…” she offered unhelpfully.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina cast a natural, sultry glance over her shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You will do no such thing. Yet.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma beamed.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Emma had convinced her to order pizza as it was getting late and the sun was going down. Regina was weird about who would get the door, as Emma had offered but she didn’t want Emma to know she was concerned that someone might snap a photo and that questions might arise about who the woman was.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Regina was so entertained talking to Emma that she didn’t notice she was actually eating. She was laughing so hard at one of Emma’s jokes when she placed her hand on her previously flat stomach to find a prominent food baby. She audibly swore drawing Emma’s attention.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s nothing. I’m just cold… maybe I should put on a sweater…” she nervously ran her hands over her stomach gauging if Emma would notice as she slipped away to change. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma set down her slice of pizza. She took in Regina’s cagy attitude and though she had avoided pushing, she thought maybe now was a good time, before this woman turned back into a knotted up emotional mess.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What did you mean when you said you weren’t allowed to look like your photo anymore?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina stopped moving. “I told you. I didn’t eat…I do, now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma tried not to watch her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I remember, is there something else I should be aware of? So I don’t… upset you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina looked back toward her room then at Emma. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So I’m not exactly fully diagnosed… but I have some pretty decent… anorexic tendencies…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked down at herself. “I see my body… in a more of a negative light than other people seem too…” her eyes snapped up. “But Kat noticed that I was working out and eating all week and I seemed happy, focused on you coming. It’s not all the time.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She knew her excuses were weak. She had a problem, well quite a few, but she wasn’t going to tell Emma that yet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded. “I guessed it was something like that. Is there anything I can do to help?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regina’s eyes burned, “No dear. I’m fine.” her arms folded to cover up herself from Emma’s view.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma glanced outside.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hot tub.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s right eyebrow shot up and as a reflex, her posture relaxed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma gestured with her head, “You said you were cold…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh. Yes, I did say that.” She stopped herself from looking down. She repeated Kat’s words to her yesterday, “Emma likes you. She’s not going to be concerned with a couple of pounds more or a couple of pounds less”. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let’s get you a swimsuit…and what about a drink? I think we have determined I am done for the night, but we could play a drinking game and I could grab some water?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma picked up their plates and pizza to put them away.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let’s do it!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina had selected another skimpy bikini that Emma couldn’t quite figure out how to get into. After a lot of laughing, they finally wrangled Emma into a simpler top. It was a standard black swimsuit with the cups a size too small to show off more breast--and Regina’s eyes were not complaining.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina mixed a drink for Emma and grabbed her refillable water tumbler with the moniker ‘Evil Queen’ loudly stamped in the side, and guided them out to the top deck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina turned on the bubbles to hopefully hide her food processing body for a while and turned it up to a good temperature. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When she turned around Emma was already in the water relaxing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh. my. god. Regina. This is amazing!” She slipped under the water and came up with her bright hair plastered against her head, water droplets cascading down her face. Regina decided at that moment she was weak for Emma’s smile. Something she would surely never tell her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A pale hand reached out, “Come on join me, I won’t look. But I do have to say, if I were allowed to look, I would tell you that you’re beautiful.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina had one hand covering her stomach but extended the other to be led down into the bubbly water.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, would you now?” She bantered as she carefully slipped in next to Emma.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes. Without a doubt”. Emma leaned into her space and kissed her on the lips briefly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So what drinking game are we playing?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Now with all but her cleavage hidden beneath the water, Regina started to feel more confident.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m still a bit high dear, perhaps you could suggest something?” She moved closer, her thighs now flush against Emmas.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well instead of two truths and a lie, we could play truth or lie? Rematch on those lie-detecting skills. Or we could just talk, and I can drink. I really just want to get to know you better.” Her smile was so earnest that Regina tried to keep her heart open, a little while longer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is there anything you want to know?” Regina’s hand found Emma’s thigh and was innocently drawing patterns.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm?” Emma asked, distracted as she took a big gulp of her drink. She choked a bit and Regina snorted.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Careful dear or you’ll end up like me earlier, on the floor.” her eyes were mischievous and Emma was down to play. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If you’re on top of me I don’t think I would care.” She gazed out to the setting sun and back at Regina.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s eyes were darkening. Her fingers inching higher. Emma finished her drink as she felt Regina growing bolder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’ve mentioned people wanting to be with your characters, but you never mention them with you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s head bobbed and held Emma’s eye contact letting her know she was listening intently.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina took a moment but she gave her insight “Sometimes you fall in love with someone...and they aren’t real.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s hand moved to the brunette's thigh and squeezed lightly in reassurance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Have you ever been someone else in a bed or a relationship?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina didn’t speak, she just nodded her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She focused harder on the patterns she was drawing and letting her fingers lightly graze under Emma’s swimsuit but not venturing too far. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma inhaled a shaky breath. “So who do I have the pleasure of right now?” She added with a questioning glance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina didn’t stop moving, her hand venturing up towards Emma’s top and under it, eliciting a groan from her blond.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not sure yet. All I know is whoever I am, in this moment, I really want to touch you…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma tried to focus as hands slid fully under her top and it was pushed up and over her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma was about to ask her if this was too much for outside when she felt pressure in her lap and a strong grip needing her breasts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I want to make you cum. So hard. I want you screaming my name, till you are too hoarse to speak tomorrow.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma whined as a hand slowly slid down her body.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No one is going to know Emma.” She rolled her hips and moved her upper hand to the back of Emma’s neck and moved in for a searing kiss just as her fingers slipped the blond’s swim bottoms aside and found Emma’s clit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma cried out softly, as Regina found her own rhythm against one of the pale legs somewhere beneath the waters. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Does that feel good?” She smirked into Emma’s ear. The blond couldn't open her eyes or form a coherent thought.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think I’ll have you come once outside. Then perhaps once in the bed you like so much. Maybe on the kitchen table. I do have some chocolate syrup I would love to try.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her fingers slid into Emma and Regina inhaled along with her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You feel amazing…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma started panting as bright lights were flashing behind her eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t usually do requests but if there’s a character I’ve played that you want I’m more than happy to play that role tonight...I am very good at acting.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma shook her head as her back arched to the sound of Regina’s voice. Her hands quickly pushing Regina’s hands away, as she laid her forehead on the brunette’s shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“I want to be with you. Can I choose that option?” she was still panting and coming down from her own high.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina waited until Emma opened her eyes then she leaned in.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Let’s see, shall we go inside?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They stumbled quickly as the night air was cold. The air in the house wasn’t much better. Regina stripped Emma down quickly and was everywhere. The blond trying to fight her off. It was the brunette’s turn.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Come on Regina, let me touch you.” she pleaded as a tanned hand again swiped through her pussy.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ok Em-ma. How do you want me?” she stepped back leaning suggestively over the bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma stepped up and grabbed her waist from behind and pulled her flush against her front.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The question is what you want.” Her hands started to roam and she could hear Regina’s cries getting louder and higher pitched.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Tie me up.” Her voice sounded sure and in pain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Please Emma…” She was ready to beg her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma turned her and lay her down gently on the bed. It felt almost predatory how slow it was and Regina's face showed her excitement.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma leaned in and kissed full lips. “Can I use the sash from your robe on the door?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded excitedly and Emma smirked. “Stay there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The Brunette didn’t move a muscle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma retrieved the item and ran it up the brunette’s body leaving goosebumps in her wake, and a few open-mouthed kisses. She noticed how Regina’s nipples grew taught and her body radiated sex and the urge for release.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She started talking as Emma tied her up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You said you wanted to have sex with Regina?” She asked quietly, still unsure what Emma wanted.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma continued to tie but looked down at her lovingly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes. Of course.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina bit her lip, “Ok. So you will probably only get her because I am high… I don’t, always know how to be her…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s hand caressed Regina’s cheek, And before Regina could just shut up and play she was talking again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m always scared of being restrained, but I also… love it. Please… just, don’t hurt me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her eyes were a bit wild and she shrunk back into herself slightly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma lay next to her and let her hand lightly trace all of Regina’s body.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve got you. I won’t hurt you, never on purpose.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina wiggled a bit, “Ok…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma started at her lips and licked and sucked until the full lips in front of hers were slightly swollen. She moved to her neck and found that a spot just under her chin, close to her pulse but not on it, made her quite loud. She moved her tongue down to a breast and made sure the nipple was throbbing by the time she was done with it, before moving to the other. Regina was straining hard against her restraints.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma looked up and made eye contact, “Do you want me to stop? Just say the word and this ends. You’re still in control Regina”.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s eyes started to burn. Because of strong emotions or her orgasm, she could feel building steadily she wasn’t sure. She thrust her hips up to get Emma to continue. Emma moved down and found that her stomach was quite ticklish.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s brain kicked in at the touch, “Am I still bloated?” she huffed out trying to raise her head to see.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma made sure her view was blocked by her long hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby you’re beautiful. I don’t think you are, but if you are it’s not a problem to me. Relax, please. I’m trying to work.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina laid her head back down as she felt another wave of euphoria as Emma’s tongue slipped into her navel and then further down. She moved slowly making sure that Regina had ample time to tell her no. She didn’t.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma settled herself between Regina’s legs and lifted her feet so her legs were at a ninety-degree angle. As Emma nibbled on the thighs close to her face she could see Regina’s sex quivering.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A strangled gasp was heard. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I shaved right, did I wax?” A strangled voice was heard as Emma inched closer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Babe, you are a goddess”. Her tongue went flat and silenced any more thoughts from the woman above her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A deep groan filled the room, “Fuck right there. Emma, please fuck me, harder. Oh shit.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma moved one arm to pull Regina harder against her mouth and the other slipped up to press on her clit. She was rewarded with the high pitch squeak. She continued hoping Regina wouldn’t have time to think. When she could feel the brunette moving faster and faster she slid her tongue up, circled the brunette's clit, and was careful to only suck on the small nub.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina screamed, it was high pitch but not as high as her squeak. Her body tried to jump up off of the bed but Emma grounded her. Her head moving up to rest on her lover's quivering stomach as she lazily drew out the orgasm with her fingers. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s it, baby, I’m here with you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina took a few minutes but her heaving for air finally started to slow. Her lower body trying to twitch away from Emma’s fingers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Bright green eyes looked up in pride.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good?” She asked looking for praise. And smiling like a fool.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina tried to open her eyes, “Fucking amazing darling.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma scooted up to lay next to Regina. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re so hot all tied up. I’m glad you’ve never done pornos, I would have to hunt down everyone who had seen them, and end them.” She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Regina’s lips.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes grew hesitant, “Hey Gina, what’s going on?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette forced herself to look at Emma.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please don’t take a photo of me. Not like this…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma reeled back, “You gotta let this photo thing go… I didn’t.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was then she noticed Regina was sobbing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Puh-please. Untie me. I’ve had enough. I...I’ll be good.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma rushed to untie her but the knot was stuck.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hang in there, stay with me, just a couple of seconds, here, lift your arms closer, there I think I got it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina rubbed at her wrists and started mouthing something. Emma pulled her into her embrace.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I got you. What happened?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina buried into the pale chest digging her nails into Emma’s back to get a grip.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is why I don’t have sex as Regina…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma felt the sharp pain from the brunette’s nails but said nothing. She just held on tighter.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey shh, it’s ok. If the ties are a trigger, then we'll get easy release handcuffs. Easy fix, ok?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Breathing started to slow. “They have those?” wiping her eyes with the back of her hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma chuckled. “Yes, and I am willing to provide some. You know next time we meet up, I have a pair. Unless we want to run out to the mall this weekend…” she rambled off aimlessly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina felt her body relax all of the way, and listened to Emma talk about cheap handcuffs until she fell asleep. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The light streaming in the window fell across two naked bodies sprawled across the queen size mattress. The brunette was hugging a pillow, as her human one had shifted during the night, her face was turned towards Emma and she was snoring slightly, her leg, however, had reached out on its own to stay in contact with her lover.</p><p> </p><p>The light moved over Emma’s face and she slowly blinked. A grin permanently fixed across her face as she took in the sight of Regina, butt ass naked. She scooted closer and started to run her hands through her hair, hearing a low hum in appreciation. Brown eyes fluttered open and then closed with a grin.</p><p> </p><p>“Emma, you should have woken me up.'' The brunette’s tone was light and playful. Emma searched her brain for what she knew about the woman's roles on tv. This had to be the real Regina. She had just come from a deep sleep, how would she have time to become someone else.</p><p> </p><p>Eyes fluttered open again, searching out green ones. “What’s on your mind dear?”</p><p> </p><p>She reached out a hand and stroked Emma’s bare chest, she couldn’t hide her smile.</p><p>Emma closed her eyes at the sensation, “This is you, right? The real you, not someone else.”</p><p> </p><p>Regina sat up to look Emma in the eyes. When she had her attention she spoke tracking the changes that might come across Emma’s features.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not trying to be anyone else...I think this is me. I get confused sometimes.” she lifted her shoulders that was as honest as she could be. </p><p> </p><p>She looked off then back at Emma. “I’m really happy right now, does that count for something?”</p><p> </p><p>Emma leaned in and kissed plush pink lips.</p><p> </p><p>Regina climbed in her lap and started to kiss her more passionately. She ran the tip of her tongue around sensitive lips and bit down firmly. Hearing a slight hiss from her bedmate. Her light mood continued as her hand reached for Emma’s sex.</p><p> </p><p>“I didn’t get to finish with you last night…”</p><p> </p><p>And just as the sensation started to build, Regina’s door slammed open.</p><p> </p><p>“Regina! Oh fuck, sorry!” Katheryn covered her eyes in horror.</p><p> </p><p>Regina removed her fingers from Emma and practically growled at her friend. “You were supposed to be at Fred’s!” </p><p> </p><p>Kat dropped her hands and switched her gaze to Emma, “Well, I thought you left with all these texts you sent last night about how you never signed up for this!” she motioned at her friend.</p><p> </p><p>Regina crossed her arms over her chest to protect herself, “I didn’t know she contacted you…”</p><p> </p><p>Hurt eyes strayed away from Emma’s, but it wasn’t the cold demeanor that Regina had hit her with before. </p><p> </p><p>Regina moved to her dresser and tossed clothes at her lover, which Emma gladly threw on.</p><p> </p><p>“Gah Regina, I can’t even keep up with you. I rushed home this morning because I thought SHE left you and you were home alone, and maybe something happened…”</p><p> </p><p>Regina quickly cut her off, “Kat, no! We are not talking about this again. Emma was here with me. I was ok. That’s the end of it. Now, why the fuck are you barging into my room at 7 AM?”</p><p> </p><p>Katheryn lifted her phone and clicked through a few things, pulling up a photo.</p><p> </p><p>“Also, someone was fucking in the hot tub yesterday. Do you recognize that person, Regina?”</p><p>Her eyes went wide. The photo was clearly her, at her house blocking the view of what was clearly a topless woman she was fondling. <em> Oh no.no.no. This was not happening. </em></p><p> </p><p>“What are they doing in our bushes!” Regina shrieked. </p><p> </p><p>Kat looked up at the ceiling, “I have no clue Regina, but you knew it was still light enough out, and Tink has been calling you for hours to get ahead of this thing but you haven't been answering”.</p><p> </p><p>Regina sat at the edge of her bed covering her face with her hands.</p><p> </p><p>“Does the studio know about this? How public is this?”</p><p> </p><p>Kat shook her head, “Fuck if I know G, but this isn’t good.”</p><p> </p><p>Regina lifted her eyes above her fingers slowly. “I’ll do a statement, say I’m bisexual. That will get people off my back and the studio can still run me with every fuckboy across Hollywood…”</p><p> </p><p>She turned her eyes back to Emma and saw frustrated flashes in green but she didn’t have time right now to worry about what that meant.</p><p> </p><p>“I need to get to Tink’s…”</p><p> </p><p>Kat followed Regina as she threw on clothes and grabbed her purse walking straight out of the house.</p><p> </p><p>“Regina, slow down. You need to go back in and talk to Emma. How long are you going to be gone? Regina!”</p><p> </p><p>She grabbed Regina’s arm but she ripped it away. “Katheryn, my career is on the line! I have to fix this. I can’t show up with the woman I was caught fucking in our hot tub!”</p><p> </p><p>Regina got in her Mercedes SUV and slammed the car door. The next minute she was speeding off.</p><p> </p><p>Katheryn stood in the driveway watching the automatic gate shut in front of her. Maybe she should have waited for the two to emerge, and then calmly explained to Regina, maybe she should have talked to Tink and gotten the details.</p><p> </p><p>She had a bad feeling she had just cost her friend something monumental. She wandered back towards the house, trying to figure out what she could tell Emma.</p><p> </p><p>She almost walked into her coming in the front door.</p><p>“Oh, Emma…”</p><p>Emma tried to sidestep her, but Katheryn caught her just in time.</p><p> </p><p>“Wait, please. This is her home too. You are more than welcome to stay. I am sure she will be much calmer when she gets back. We can hang out. Binge a show, hang out in the hot tub…”</p><p> </p><p>At Emma’s worried face she amended, “No funny business, don’t worry. Regina is like a sister to me. And it may not feel like it but she is so into you…”</p><p> </p><p>Emma’s eyes started to betray her as she angrily scrubbed at them. “Katheryn I just, I’m not cut out for this, for her. She keeps telling me that she’s not sure of who she is at any given moment, she tosses me aside every chance she gets, I-I…”</p><p> </p><p>She raises her own hand to stop herself.</p><p>“I gave her another chance last night. I just can’t anymore. I’m sorry. Please tell her I wish her the best, and I hope she gets some help…”</p><p> </p><p>Kat released her but crossed her arms and spoke quietly.</p><p> </p><p>“That’s her with help, Emma. Do you think I haven’t tried? I know you might not get our world, but for us, this is fairly normal. The difference is I give a shit about that girl. She has the biggest heart, she loves with everything that she is, and everything but me destroys her. Women, men, her career, the drugs.., it’s endless. She has problems, yes, she has medication, ones that she abuses like you saw last night… She's seen every therapist that the best can buy. And you started to make a difference. I don’t know what happened to her that night she showed up at your door but something about you stabilized her. I can only do that if she’s around me, but she wants to be better. She can’t help it, a lot of it is trauma. I won’t spill her secrets but she is amazing and you are missing out.”</p><p> </p><p>Emma’s chest constricts and she’s not so sure she’s leaving. But then again for her own mental health, she knows this isn’t good for her either.</p><p> </p><p>“When you tell her you are scared to lose her, you’re talking about suicide aren't you?” Emma works hard to hold Katheryn’s gaze.</p><p> </p><p>Kat blinks hard and looks skyward to not cry.</p><p>“Promise me if she ever calls… you’ll answer. Just please give her that much…”</p><p> </p><p>Emma sighs and nods. “It’s for the best we don’t talk anymore. But yes. If she calls I will pick up, I promise. I… wouldn’t want to lose her either.”</p><p> </p><p>Kat smiles sadly, “Thank you. I really need my best friend.”</p><p> </p><p>Emma nods back. “I should really get going.”</p><p> </p><p>Kat grabs her purse and keys. “I’m not letting you find your own way to the airport. I’ll drive you. Also, Regina would kill me if I didn’t get your ticket squared away.”</p><p> </p><p>Emma waves her hands, “No Katheryn, I can’t let you do that. I’m sure I’ll figure out the old flight number...”</p><p> </p><p>Katheryn gestures to get into the car and laughs, “Oh sweetheart you shouldn’t worry about my money. Have you ever heard of the Midas Holdings?”</p><p> </p><p>Emma wracked her brain as she fastened her seatbelt. And she paused, wait you mean the one that bought out Disney and Netflix and owns like 75% of the entertainment industry? That Midas Holdings?”</p><p> </p><p>Katheryn inclines her head, “Well, we used to own that much but now we are down to more of a 47% market dominance. And Regina’s family is from the Mills Corporation. Not like you would have heard of it, they aren't very public. They deal more in venture capital but Regina always had a passion for acting. So when she confessed to me when we were younger, I helped her drop out of school and pursue her true dreams. When she succeeded her mother came around… well with the help of expensive gifts...Cora’s a fucking piece of work I can tell you from experience.”</p><p> </p><p>Emma leaned back and looked out the window. “Katheryn I am learning more from you than I ever did from her lips. It just wasn’t meant to be. I’m a normal person. I don’t get your world and I don’t think I want to …”</p><p> </p><p>Katheryn tips her head down, “Why do you think I stayed out of the limelight? You won’t find me in the tabloids much because I work very hard to not have a following. I’m blunt and unlikeable on purpose --G tells me it’s my superpower. Anyways, I stay as far away from that as I can. Especially when I started to see what the fame was doing to my best friend. It’s like she’s an addict.”</p><p> </p><p>Emma gave her a look.</p><p> </p><p>“She’s not an addict, with drugs at least. She just can’t handle her life and wants to be numb, a lot of the time... “</p><p> </p><p>Emma glanced back at Katheryn. “That’s no way to live.”</p><p> </p><p>…………………………………………………………………………………………</p><p> </p><p>Emma returned home early and was happy to be reunited with Ginger. She spent all day Saturday holed up on her couch watching My Little Pony because she was too scared any show with live people might accidentally have Regina in them. She had been blowing up the last couple of years and Emma didn’t want to take any chances.</p><p> </p><p>She found a bucket of bubblegum ice cream and finally learned what it was like to eat her feelings. Her friends asked if she wanted to go out but she knew she had a good week before she would possibly feel up to it. For now, it was her, Ginger, and her couch against the world.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It's my birthday so... update. Maybe double update :)</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Regina arrived at Tink’s house in a frenzy. She buzzed herself in at the gate, Tink must have been waiting for her, and her tiny agent-publicist came rushing out of the house to her car. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Finally! Where have you been? The world has been going nuts over those images!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tugged Regina into her house and plopped them on her sofa in front of her laptop.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink clicked on an image and enlarged it. “Regina, you know this is exactly the kind of thing I need to know about, we haven't’ even dealt with a press release about your alleged kidnapping…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s temper erupted, “I was fucking obducted! I was in some damn truck or van completely drugged, I am just lucky they got the dosage wrong and I was able to tumble myself out at a stop and run for my life. I didn’t plan on meeting Emma! She just was there and saved my damn life. I didn’t plan on falling for her stupid smile and how god damn normal she seems, it just happened!” She was huffing as she ran out of breath. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink blinked, Regina had never directed her anger at her before. Sure the name evil queen wasn’t only a moniker from the show Regina was on, it was a persona that spilled over into other areas of her life as well. And now to one of her most trusted advisers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She felt like drinking, like taking something, or for Emma to hold her right now. She needed one of her vices to ground her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink pulled her into a hug, “Sweetheart I am so sorry. That’s terrifying. Tell me everything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink listened as Regina poured her heart out. About how she ran into Emma and how Emma was a fan. How Emma had ripped up a beloved poster because it had upset Regina and how Emma seemed to be the thing she had been missing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink made them calming tea and Regina continued on until she ran out of steam.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I should be back home now talking to her and not here with you…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink nodded in understanding, “I agree babe, but we need to determine what we are going to tell the press.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina flopped back on the couch. “Just tell them I’m coming out as bisexual and that was a private moment between me and someone special.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink patted Regina on the leg, “You know this is the game, Regina. Bisexual is a good move with these images leaked. But is it true?” Tink could always see right through her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina let out a breath she was holding. “Of course it’s not true.” Tink nodded, “I’m gay.” Tink looked up a bit shocked. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s eyes slid to the petite woman. “Yeah, my whole life. I just… never met anyone worthwhile before. Well, anyone that was interested in me in return.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink made a couple of notes. “Ok so we are going with you recently discovered you were bisexual and you were having a private moment on your property. We will look into the trespassing and see if we can get them, you have security cameras right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, a few. I’ll have Kat help me look into it. I think she knows how to get the recordings.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The small woman smiled, “Good. Is there anything else you want to tell me? Are you still on your medication? Off of the record of course.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes trailed back to the ceiling. “Sometimes. I’m trying…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The blond nodded sympathetically. “That’s all we can do is try Regina.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette laughed, “All the money Kat spent on therapy for me and your degree in Marriage Family Therapy has helped me more than all the quarks in this shit city. Thanks for letting me be an unofficial client.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink squeezed her hand. “As much as I want to challenge you, Regina, you really do take on a lot and you need to slow down. This woman seems like she is good for you, maybe take some time off and focus on her, yes?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina sat up and put her hands on her knees. “I have a movie shoot in Vancouver starting in a couple of months, after the EverAfter Con.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She squeezed her knees and rocked forward. Groaning. “What am I going to do…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Life will go on Regina. But I would suggest that you have tried the career route, and as your agent, I highly encourage that move. But...well, as your unofficial therapist and your friend, I think maybe it’s time you try something new. But you have to make that decision for yourself.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina got up to leave, now that she was calmer her body was begging to have Emma wrap her up in a warm hug until tomorrow morning. Maybe if she actually did something date-ish tonight for Emma, she would get her wish.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink stood as well, “Regina, this woman. Is there anything I should be concerned about if things go badly, not that they will, I just want to be prepared.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She turned around with a sad smile, “She could destroy me with what she knows. There’s no going back from her. I have to hope she’s who she says she is.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>………………………………………………………………..</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina left Tink’s with a clear idea of the night ahead. She headed to her favorite bakery and got strawberries, chocolate covered. She dropped into Target with her shades on to get some string lights, she almost got out of there without being recognized but she signed a couple of autographs and then made it to her favorite place to buy wine, just down the street from her home.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She figured she could tell Emma to go relax while she set up. She was so happy she had another day to make things up to her, and she was going to give it her all. As she locked up her car she saw the front door open and had a glimmer of hope that Emma wasn’t terribly mad at her. When she saw Katheryn in the door instead, she knew she was in for it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Damn she really didn’t take it well did she…” Her shoulders sagged, but only for a moment. She had this. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn wasn’t sure how best to break the news. “Regina…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina lugged her bags inside, around Katheryn. “Don’t worry, I’ve got this! I picked up wine, lights, and those chocolate-covered strawberries.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A hand reached out and touched her arm. “Honey, you need to sit down.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes went slightly unfocused, “Did something happen to Emma?” her voice shook.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my … Kat is she hurt?!” Katheryn sat her friend down on the couch in the living room right beside the open kitchen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Baby doll… Emma, well, she left.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s throat started to close. “You mean for a walk? Because she’s mad at me. I didn’t want to come back until I had a good date idea...I had one…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat could see she was shaking and deep down knew the truth.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Baby doll… I think you know what I mean…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s tears were flooding down her face. “No...no I-I was going to pick her, I was going to take time off. I… I brought back a date night. A real one…” She couldn’t see anymore and she was finding it hard to breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat pulled Regina in for a hug. “I know Gina. I know. She just wasn't ready for this. Maybe give her some time.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s head shot up. “But I should tell her sorry. I-I wanna tell her about my date night I planned…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat started dragging her fingers through her friend’s hair.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know if that’s the best idea, but I’m not going to stop you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I-I need to talk to her… she wouldn’t….not answer me would she?” Her eyes pleaded with Kat to fix everything and it broke Kat’s heart.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Listen. I won’t stop you from calling her. But. the moment you are done or she doesn't answer, you come to me. We will watch a movie or snuggle in my bed and just cry it out ok? I don’t want you alone.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina grabbed her phone and left Kat to start putting her bags away, Katheryn loved to clean and found it cathartic, and boy did she need something to do with herself right now. She just hoped Emma would answer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina clicked on Emma’s image and the phone started to ring. She held her breath and tried to be patient as her heart beat out of her chest. Every nerve firing at once. It rang once and she thought Emma could be unlocking her phone. It rang twice and she started to question her reality, a third time sent her into a shaking mess on her knees and the 4th ring she started to forget how to breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Hi you’ve reached Emma Swan’s phone…</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She promptly hung up and tried again. Same result, but this time she tried to leave a message.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Hey *breath* Emma, it’s… me, Regina. I just got home. I was picking…*breath* some stuff up for our date night. I know I *breath* really messed up and I want to apologize...please-please call me back?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hung up with a sick feeling in her gut and she wanted to hurl up her feelings. She walked into her bathroom and looked at her pills, she needed to calm down. That was a Xanax, she would have to go beg Katheryn for one. She hoped she would take pity on her tonight, it wasn’t like she controlled the stash…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A *ding* was heard and her eyes snapped back to the phone she had left on her bed. She wiped at her face even though that did nothing, and she moved to check her texts. She finally heaved in a breath when she saw it was from Emma.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Hey Regina, I don’t think it’s best if I talk to you right now. I’m not in a good place, but I didn’t want to leave you hanging. If you really are not ok and are alone please do call me back and I’ll pick up. I do care about you and thank you for planning what I know would have been a very sweet date night. I just honestly don’t think I am in a space where I can be what you need. You have a lot you need to work out with yourself, and I don’t think I can help you with that. I really wish I could. You have a beautiful body and I wish I could erase your demons for you. You did seem to be improving with that from what you told me and I hope you keep that up. I just don’t know what’s going on with your moods and your personalities and I feel like every time it’s something new, and you don’t really tell me about any of it. What really gets me is every time something bad happens you are so ready to throw me away. What you forget Regina is I was a foster child. Yeah, crazy right? I wasn’t in the system forever but it did enough damage being abandoned once, and I always wondered if my adoptive parents were going to take me back. You couldn’t have known that and I don’t hold that against you but clearly you aren’t healthy for me. This is really hard because I do really like you, and I know that’s crazy to say a couple of weeks in, but I am really going to miss you. Get better ok? And I really think we should cut contact, but again if you are ever down and find yourself alone, I will always be a lifeline. Take care of yourself, and Kat, she’s a real good friend, you are so lucky.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina read the message five times before it sunk in. She was done. Emma was done. She only made it 2 weeks. Usually, people wanted to mooch off her fame and money but not Emma, she had wanted her, well a version of her. And she was right, she didn’t want the real Regina. The real thing was messy and psychotic...she could hear her mother’s words creep into her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>An actor, ha! You were on track for a finance job, stability, a husband Regina! You are just going to throw that all away? For some psychotic fantasy? No one wants to pay attention to you, you’re so whiny and pathetic. You might as well become an artist, at least there is some talent left in that. The art world could still be refined. But acting, honestly. So you can go around and cry on command about how terrible your childhood was? Give me a break your father and I gave you everything, and you still turned out to be such a disappointment. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina doubled over in pain, crying out. Katheryn came as soon as she heard her.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Come on you, let’s give you a xanny, I think you do need it tonight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry Kat… I’m sorry I exist…I don’t know what I’m doing so wrong…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat grabbed her face with both hands.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Regina you fight damn it, you stay, because you can have someone like Emma again. That’s the light at the end of the tunnel. You can love and you can have a relationship. But you have to slow down.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina didn’t respond; she just let Kat take her hand and give her a pill and water and tuck her in. Kat held her all night, as she cried her heart out, as she finally went numb and fell asleep.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Chapter 16</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>in honor of my bday yesterday here's another update :) and thanks for the bday wishes!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Emma tried going out a week later, it didn’t help much. Her heart was still broken and she wasn’t interested in a single girl that tried to buy her a drink. Much to her friends Ruby and Belle’s disappointment. As her friends went off to dance Emma sat at the bar and played with her phone. She knew she shouldn’t but she was a few drinks in and she went to her ex’s Instagram page. There she saw Regina out at her own party dancing and having fun, just like she should be doing. Then she also saw a video, an hour-long video of Regina just talking to her fans at one in the morning. She snorted when she realized that it had been on the morning of 4/20, and her ex was probably faded beyond belief. She couldn’t hear what she was saying well but she figured when she went home soon she would watch the whole thing. It seemed masochistic, but it made her feel closer to the brunette like she could love her and stay a safe distance away. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ruby and Belle were preoccupied and she really just wanted to go home. She knew they wouldn’t approve of why, so she slipped onto the dance floor to let them know she was getting a migraine and needed to go home and rest. She received two big decently tipsy hugs that brought a smile to her face as she caught a ride home. All the while she looked at photos of her ex traveling like a crazy person around the U.S. She had been partying in Miami, New York, and Chicago, but seemed to not venture anywhere near San Francisco again. Emma had an inkling as to why. She didn’t like it, but she was mad at herself for being jealous that Regina seemed to be handling moving on so much better than her. She knew she had told her not to call but, she really thought she would have tried harder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma watched the buildings flash by as she let the radio music calm her soul. When she arrived home she made some popcorn and grabbed a soda to sit down and watch Regina’s coming out interview. She had put this off for what was it 3 weeks now, had it been longer? She hadn’t been ready for Miss Mills to come out as bisexual, and still stay in the closet as a full lesbian. She really did think the woman deserved better, deserved to be herself. There was nothing wrong with a bi girl, she herself thought she was one in middle school, but when she realized she only liked guys as friends and girls would always mean something more, well she wasn’t ready to stay in the closet for no one. Luckily, her parents were super understanding, and it took a while for her mom to transition her dreams for her daughter's future to include a wife and not a husband, but she took herself to therapy and groups until she felt she really got what being an LGBTQ mother was all about. Her dad was thrilled to talk to Emma about girls and to give her tips, that above all you should always come from the heart and a place of love and humility. Emma missed her parents, she needed to plan a visit home soon. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As she sat down to watch the cursed interview, she realized that in all of her depression days these past few weeks, she hadn’t paid her rent. She knew there would be a $500 late fee but it was what it was at this point. She should have just enough before work picked up again. She glanced at her cat, beckoning her to join her on the couch for this little game of self-torture.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Come on Ging, we’re going to watch your best friend.” but instead of the cat joining her on the couch, she sat in the middle of the rug looking up at the tv.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Green eyes rolled, “You are going to hurt your eyes sitting that close.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She hit play on the YouTube video.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Interviewer: And tonight we have the absolute pleasure of speaking to rising star Regina Mills about coming out as bisexual, and going from ally to member of the LGBTQ community!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Interviewer: Miss Mills thank you for being here!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Oh please, call me Regina. And thank you for such a warm welcome.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I: Of course. Now I am a big fan and all of us are dying to know, when did you first know you were into men and women?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma watched as Regina’s practiced smile fell into place.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Well the first straight girl I fell for was in...oh gosh, maybe it was as early as fifth grade! That sounds terrible, so young. I fell for a straight girl. But we ended up being lifelong friends.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Wait, was she talking about Katheryn?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I: Oh Regina, we have all been there girl! What’s been on the horizon for you lately? Are you single? Taken? Poly? </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The last bit was added with a wink. Regina shooting the camera a silly face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Unfortunately, I am just out of a relationship and taking time for me. It was a very quick romance and it taught me a lot. But now I am taking time to step back and really focus on myself and my career.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I: Oh I am so sorry to hear that, well he’s an idiot for letting you go, Regina, I think we all can agree on that.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was a cheer from the small camera crew and Regina paused.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: She, dear. My lover was a she.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes bugged out. Regina was really pushing the women loving thing, strong. She kind of felt bad for assuming she was going to be another “bisexual” who only did one LGBTQ event and maybe went on a few dates with a girls but then went back to men.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I: Oh, she is missing out. I am so sorry I assumed.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: That is perfectly fine, dear. I am sure my queerness is new to a lot of people.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I: Any other plans before EverAfter Con in SF?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: No, I think I’m just going to spend time with my loved ones and let loose. Maybe make it to pride this summer and see what that’s all about from a new perspective. Out and proud.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I: Well thank you Miss Mills you’ve been an absolute treat. We can’t wait to see you back on tv as the evil queen.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s evil laugh filled the air and the clip ended.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s mouth was wide open. She wanted to text Regina so badly and tell her how proud she was of her. But they hadn’t spoken in weeks. She switched to her phone to watch the Instagram TV video the woman had left.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Hiyuh everyone! I’mmm Regie ah and I *giggle just wanted to say happy 4/20 to my friends out there! I have a friend joining me in a minute. But for now… who out there is ready to just relax today and kick back and not have to worry about a goddamn thing, I know I’m there.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, here she comes--Zelenaaa!</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Z: Hello Darling, and hello to all of the fans who stayed up late, got up early to be here with us in this moment! The amount of love we feel from you dears makes our hearts so happy with joy.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Regina, I can see you’re celebrating something already?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded, trying to figure out where to focus her attention on the camera or on the screen. Her face scrunching in debate made Emma’s face hurt as she was smiling so hard at the goofball on screen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: I think it’s great because it’s a time to just let things go, and move on from a place of positivity you know? And who cares if she didn’t want to talk to me anymore...</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma froze. Shit. Regina did look pretty gone. Was she about to air their dirty laundry to the world? Emma hadn’t even told her friends much about her mystery girl, just that she was some actress in LA, but wasn’t everyone who lived in LA? Her friends didn't even bat their eyes at that.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Z: Well Regina we all know the best way to get over a witch is to get on top of another one, ay? Who’s with me? Oh, look at that chat! Looks like everyone is excited to see who your next love interest will be.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Whereas Regina had been silly before she became contemplative and slowed down even further.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: You know… I just, don’t think I’m ready yet. I still need to heal. And as busy as I try to keep myself normally, it doesn’t help. And I have a lot of ...work...that I need to do first. Like... did you know... women expect actual dates? With dudes, it was all straight sex. But with women there is this whole dance you have to do, and I love it. I just wish I was a faster learner… cause ….oh well you know what I mean. Girls are amazing.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zelena laughed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Z: Here’s a bit of an insider scoop for those of you listening this early in the morning. I dabbled a bit in the art of women myself, but alas, I just go weak for a big strong man… I swoon.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina rolled her eyes but didn’t say more, she seemed to actually lose her smile. The rest of the video was her talking about how everyone has mental health problems even her -- something she had never previously talked about. Emma wondered briefly if Tink had had a heads up about this, or if she was in for a rude awakening in the morning. Luckily for her career, and sadly for Emma, she didn’t divulge too much about her own mental disorders, but she had admitted she had them and promised to be more involved in the future not only with LGBTQ rights but also with destigmatizing mental health. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She would go off on tangents… the best one being about the proper way to open an orange, which absolutely no one followed. And she promised everyone she would go live again soon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma stared at her photo for a while. She even hovered over a text to Regina, but in the end, she didn’t send it. She seemed happier, and Emma really wished that wasn’t just for the cameras.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>…………………………………………………………..</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The first week Regina did what she normally would. She chased any ability to get numb, though this time every night she made it home to platonically cuddle with Katheryn, who would take her in whatever state she was in and just be there with her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>One night Regina came home crying that she had attended a gala and fucked some girl in the bathroom. But she was too high to remember who it was and that, when the girl tried to touch her, she couldn’t let her. What broke Kat’s heart was Regina went on and on about how she had been so high she had thought she was Emma. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When 4/20 rolled around Katheryn had found Regina out in the backyard by the hot tub staring up at the sky, after her online session with Zelena. She had rummaged through Katheryn's room to find her Xanax and popped three or was it six, most of the bottle? Katheryn took her to the ER and had her stomach pumped to no avail and she was forced to watch her best friend pumped with drugs for a potential overdose, at least this time she didn’t take the whole bottle. A psych ward was ruled out as they didn’t think Regina was necessarily suicidal, it seemed her normal dosage just wasn’t enough for her to become numb anymore, so she took more, and more. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat watched Regina lay lifeless in her bed, she was too scared to sleep. She feared Regina’s heart might finally stop beating. When she couldn’t take it anymore, she crawled in bed with her and placed her head on Regina’s chest and started to cry. Her sobs reverberating in Regina’s body, waking her from her slumber. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her hand found the back of Kat’s head. “Hey, Katheryn, why are you crying? Did I sleep in late and miss your wedding?” Her face cracked a smile, which only made Katheryn cry harder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I wish I could be her for you Regina. I really do. I wish so much that I was gay and that I could be everything for you, I-I want you to be happy …”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina opened her eyes and looked up at Katheryn. “It’s ok. This way I have you forever right? Girls come and go for me… but not my Kat. She’s always there.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She sighed, “And you need to let me go a little. I need to move out of our house eventually and learn to stand on my own.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat shook her head, “Baby doll you’re not stable enough… Fred can move in. You don’t have to leave…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina found a pale hand. “You are too good to me. And I won’t let me take you down with me. I want you happy Kat, don’t you get that. I always have you if I need you. But I need to let you go just a little too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well you are not moving anytime soon, that is final.” Katheryn accentuated her tone with a motion that sliced through the air.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina smiled, “I know. Just someday. Kat, I think I need to go back to therapy. And I need really stabilizing drugs, not the numbing stuff…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat smiled, “That… that would be really good, G. How about we squeeze in a session with Tink tomorrow, I’ll take you to the doctor, and we will get your drugs straightened out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina laced their fingers together and closed her eyes, and waited for the doctor to release her to go home. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>………………………………………………………………</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A few days later, Regina forced herself out of bed and was in the kitchen making coffee and trying to cook. Much to the amusement of her best friend.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You are going to catch that towel on fire…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette glared over her shoulder, “It’s just resting there for a second…” A loud beeping sound silenced her thoughts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She quickly climbed on the counter and it took her a couple of tries but she got the smoke detector to calm down. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She threw the charred towel into the sink.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ok fine. So it caught fire…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat just shook her head while she opened the sliding glass door and Regina opened the kitchen one. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat walked over as Regina cooked and gave her a big hug.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m so happy you are still alive.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina relaxed into her hold, “I promised you Kat, I’m not going anywhere. It was an honest mistake. One I won’t be making again. Now, would you sit down, your huevos en fuego are almost done.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat tickled her side and Regina smacked her away, “Hey! Don’t mess with the cook!” her real laugh was back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They had breakfast and then a session scheduled with Tink, followed by a doctor's visit that Katheryn would attend to facilitate a true course of treatment, not a bandaid this time. And Regina was more than happy to let her friend take the lead, and this time didn’t fight her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink opened the door with welcoming arms and pulled the two women into tight hugs.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my dears, let’s get things sorted shall we?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They all sat down with a cup of tea, as Tink got herself ready for more of a session then a friendly chat.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina, first off, I want to say we can continue on, but I also want you to start going to my friend Jasmine Alabawa to get some real unbiased therapy worked in. I want you to start working on your personality disorders, along with the drug abuse. Now Katheryn had a brief chat with me about some of what you talked to Emma about and I would like to dig a little deeper into some of your comments if you think you are up for that?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded and felt supported with not only Katheryn by her side, but Tink’s presence as well. This was the first time she really took a moment to enjoy the fact that she had a support system. She looked at each woman and remembered how they had come into her life and was so happy she had met Kat and been introduced to Tink, through Kat. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ok thank you Regina for being so willing to even show up today. That was a big step. Now Katheryn had mentioned one item that you and Emma seemed to have some strain over was with your attachment to your personality? Can you tell me a bit more about that?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina cleared her throat, leaned forward on her elbows, and felt Kat’s hand connect with her back in support.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, It’s been easier for me to fall into these characters that I have played, than me trying to remember who Regina really is. Sometimes it’s easier to remember how to be the evil queen or the doctor than to be in my own skin and my own mind. That’s how I even got married in the first place to Daniel. When it all started off, he knew we were just two friends getting married for publicity, but over the two years we were together, he started to push for a baby. The time I conceded that it could look good for my image to be a mother and to have that experience for my acting career. We miscarried.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink took some notes and her eyes connected with Regina to let her know she was still there with her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What did you feel when that happened, when you miscarried?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina dug deep, and tried to let her feelings come to the surface.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I felt… relieved? I, well Regina didn’t want a baby with Daniel.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink paused her writing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Regina?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes looked up at attention.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you … not Regina Mills? Is that how it feels?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s eyes scrunched, “What do you mean? That’s the name on my birth certificate.” she let out a nervous laugh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina, there are a few diagnoses you have had in the past, can you remember what they are for me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded, “I think we talked about Anorexia, Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar Personality Disorder, Depression…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked at Tink for help, “Yes, those are all correct. What is concerning me is that you have never presented with dissociative idenity disorder. It’s when you have multiple personalities running through one person. But the onset is generally really young as repeated traumatic events prevent your childhood pieces to coming together into one consciousness. What you seem to have is a disruption or splitting of your psyche, at a much later age. Do you think this has something to do with your line of work?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Wide eyes nodded, “Wait, am I actually different people? Is that why Emma left me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink leaned forward and opened her hands. “I don’t think you have what we used to call multiple personality disorder, at least not in the traditional sense, but you do seem to really be struggling with who you are and the separation between the characters you have played and yourself. Which can cause problems.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded, “I asked Emma… who she would rather have sex with once, because I can slip in and out of each character so well, and in the past, that’s all anyone wanted of me. To be with the evil queen or to sleep with the doctor. No one ever wanted Regina until Emma. And I didn’t even know how to be her when that’s who she wanted…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink hummed in understanding. “I think there is a fractured personality, maybe not a full split. Do you ever lose yourself to the queen or the doctor? Meaning, do you ever feel like they take over and you are not in control?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina wracked her brain, “I think I hide behind them, but I am never not in control. I just don’t know which parts are me and which parts belong to them, if that makes sense?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink bobbed her head. “Regina, you have got to take a break. Some time away could really help cement who you are again, away from these other lives. There’s no problem in taking away lessons learned from each character, or to emulate some of their behavior, but if you are still slipping into their skin… that is a concerning problem.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina started scratching at her arm. Kat calming her movements.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How do I get over Emma? I’ve… I have tried to stop thinking about her, but that’s all I seem to do.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink set her chin on her pen as she contemplateed something.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can you tell me who loves Emma?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina doesn’t skip a beat, “Well I do, obviously. I can’t stop thinking about her.” She folds her arms in frustration.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink cracks a smile. “Does the queen love Emma?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina looks confused. “No… she had a stable boy she loved. I love Emma…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink sets down her pen. “And right there. There is the proof that you can fix this personality split. You know that you love Emma. That’s something only you do.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette nodded, her own brain catching up, “Yes, like I have you and Kat. You two bring out the real me…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink beams, “And that’s your answer. When you become too lost we are your anchors. Use that Regina. When you feel yourself drifting call one of us to talk. Presumably me or Kat….”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina inclines her head. “Emma told me I could call if it was serious…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Tink’s face furrows, “Your ex? The one you haven’t talked to in a month?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina contemplates the time, “I think it’s two months now? But yes. She told me that she would rather I call her than hear about something happening to me. So I think I have her as well…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat rubs at her back and offers Tink a sad look. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s mind is already wandering, she’ll be in SF in a few weeks. Maybe she needed to reach out, once more…</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Chapter 17</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Regina had arrived in SFO and had taken a relatively short ride to her hotel, she had a good long evening before the convention was due to begin. She did have an early morning. But she was itching to contact Emma. She had waited and not told a single person of her plan, well it wasn’t much of a plan. Get to San Francisco, call Emma, and see if she would allow her to apologize in person.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She lay on her bed and searched Emma’s contact info and smiled when she saw the oh too familiar cat image she had picked out. She felt nervous despite her mood stabilizers that she had begun to take every day. It seemed a lot easier to ground herself in "Regina" if her emotions weren’t frantically bouncing all over the place. Her anxieties didn’t disappear but they quieted down enough that she could think now. And her depression was more manageable. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She took a deep breath and hit call. The first two rings made sense, maybe Emma needed to get to her phone, but by the fourth ring, she knew it wasn’t happening. She was preparing herself for what she was going to say in a message, should she even leave one? When her other line started buzzing, she looked at her phone puzzled until she noticed it was Emma calling. She quickly jumped lines.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi, Regina?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She closed her eyes for a moment and let the familiar voice wash over her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Emma, hi. Sorry, I was just leaving you a voicemail…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There was a pause where the brunette thought she lost the other woman,</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, I’m sorry, did you want to go back and do that?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina let some of her nervous energy bounce out through her empty hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No this is fine. How… how are you, Emma?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma was a swirl of emotions, she never thought she was going to speak with Regina ever again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m… ok, yeah, doing ok. How are you? I saw you’ve been pretty busy, I’m… I’m so proud of you, by the way, Regina. I’m really happy for you, but maybe you should lay off the live interviews when you’re inebriated?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina groaned, “Oh you saw that one did you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She heard a light laugh over the line, “Yeah, I did. And your coming-out interview. The fact that the interview focused on women exclusively was… unexpected.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina shrugged. “I wanted to be as open as I could be at the time.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She waited a moment, “I don’t mean to be a downer but I have only been doing better the last few weeks...and I have thought a lot about what happened and I would love the chance to apologize in person. If that’s amenable to you? I have a panel at 8:30 tomorrow morning, but I am free this evening…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma faltered. This was the chance she had been waiting for, for a while now. She didn’t want to pass it up, but things with Regina had a way of always going downhill fast.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“G, do you really think that is the best idea?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina could hear the hesitance in her tone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Would you turn me away, if I showed up tonight?” She gripped the phone tight, hanging on to how Emma was breathing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma rolled her eyes, though Regina couldn’t tell that through the phone. “No. I wouldn’t do that to you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina took a breath. “Ok, I was thinking of grabbing some dinner and maybe heading over after. Is there anything you would want me to bring?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma shook her head, “Nope, just get here safely, and enjoy your dinner. I know it may not sound like it, but I am happy you called, Regina.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>……………………………………………………………….</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina showed up an hour later with Emma’s favorite ice cream and a cactus.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma answered the door in running shorts and a tank top. Her gaze finally landing on the brown orbs that haunted her dreams.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is for you… the place I grabbed the ice cream from didn’t have flowers...it’s a succulent actually. Hard to kill, and this one should be safe for Ginger, and no pointy things….”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma took the plant and moved it to the top of her fridge, “Well this cute plant can go up here, so Ging won’t chew on her. Thank you, Regina, you really didn’t have to do that.” When she turned around a bucket of ice cream was shoved into her arms and Emma smiled and put it away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before she could turn back to her guest again, there was a loud meow from the floor and Regina’s eyes fell to the fluffball.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, kid.” She squatted down and gave the baby all the scratches in the best places.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Did you miss me? Is your mommy being good to you?” Her voice had changed to talk to the cat, and Emma’s heart warmed. She was reminded of exactly why she had been falling in love with this woman.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina straightened and put her hands in the back pockets of her jeans.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m on mood stabilizers now…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma was shocked with the turn of the conversation, “That’s great. Are they working out ok?” Regina fumbled for where to sit, Emma grabbed her arm and guided her to the couch. Ginger promptly jumping up in who she had clearly deemed her second mommy's lap. Regina started to mindlessly pet the furball while they talked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s only been a couple of weeks but it seems to be helping. I had a really bad episode right before I started on them…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma wracked her brain, “Wait around 4/20?” Regina nodded as she focused on her friend. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, the second time poor Kat had to take me to the Emergency Room. I’m trying really hard not to worry her anymore.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma felt terrible. When she watched that video she just knew something was off, she should have called Regina. She was such an idiot.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What happened?” She tried to not busy her hands with something, but found herself picking at her couch anyways. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina sighed quietly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I took too many pills. In my defense, they just weren’t working, I wasn’t trying to kill myself this time…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma stopped breathing, it was different to speculate about someone’s life, rather than to actually have to hear it from Regina’s mouth. Her mind went all kinds of places. She looked at the person across from her and felt her stomach bottom out, what if Regina didn’t exist anymore? How devastated would Emma have felt reading about it on celebrity news? Emma shivered. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes lifted, “Oh I’m sorry I tend to overshare…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma returned from her thoughts and snorted, “You never seemed to with me…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina could feel the bitter tone, “I opened up the most to you, more than anyone in a long time.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am very sorry Emma, that I messed up our weekend together, I hope you can forgive me. I would like to be friends if you would be alright with that?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma took in Regina’s appearance. She seemed more relaxed, less neurotic than before.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I… I will think about it, ok?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A tanned face nodded. “Of course, take all the time you need.” She yawned.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Was there anything you needed to know? For you I am an open book, well I am trying to be.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma reached forward to pet her cat too. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Now that we aren’t ...together… now you trust me with your chamber of secrets?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I always wanted to trust you, Emma. And, nothing I told you ever got out. I can’t thank you enough for that by the way. I really don’t have much faith in people as you can imagine...it was a nice surprise.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma squeezed her arm, “I told you I wouldn’t ever hurt you on purpose.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina smiled sadly, “But I hurt you and I am really sorry about that. I wish I could take it back. And I wish I had known you better at the time… for an orphan, you are way more stable than this person sitting in front of you who grew up with both parents.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma inclined her head. Regina’s wiki never mentioned her father.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You grew up with your dad?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina could feel ice crawling up her veins. “Maybe we don’t talk about that right now? Not something I have worked through yet I am afraid…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded, “Of course, I am sorry I pushed.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina took a deep breath but didn’t cry. “I’m ok, I am sure we can talk about it one day, just not tonight. “</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma searched her mind for something else Regina had said to talk about. “Mood stabilizers? Does this mean you are back in therapy?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette's head looked down and nodded. “Yes. I go to Tink once per week and to Dr. Alabawa every other week, and they changed my meds.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma scooted closer to offer Regina an awkward side hug. The older woman melted into her touch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We collaborated on a treatment plan for my anorexia, my BPD, my Bi-polar disorder, and my personality fracturing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyebrows furrowed. “I’m not sure I understand those terms.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Reinga noticed Emma wasn’t moving away and felt more comforted with her touch to open up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The anorexia comes from my mother and my first marriage. Something about the duality of my mother encouraging me not to eat, as a child, which quickly switched to rage when I got married and two years later I still wasn’t pregnant yet. Cora, my mother, told me no one would want such a pudgy woman after I did gain the weight, Daniel was also frustrated when I miscarried and had some baby weight to lose, he didn’t want to take me around as his trophy wife to events anymore…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma gripped her harder and Regina paused. Emma nodded her head for her to continue. “I have Borderline Personality Identity Disorder and Bi-Polar Personality Disorder from childhood trauma, I am not quite sure of the difference myself but I am sorry but that is another thing I am not quite ready to talk about. But the last one I can. Apparently due to the nature of my work and how I approach my work I have been fracturing my identity and struggling to… function.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma pulled her in for a proper hug, “I am so sorry I didn’t call you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina shook her head but laid down on Emma’s shoulder. “ I should have called you instead of reaching for the pills, but I am getting better. Slowly.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina yawned again, and Emma could tell she could hardly keep her eyes open. “I think I need to let you go to sleep, but Regina I really appreciate you opening up to me. I don’t understand all of it, but I would like to try to.” Emma leaned her head slightly on Regina’s. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes lost their spark. “I can call an Uber…” Emma shifted so she could see Regina’s face and placed her hand on her jean-clad leg.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Nonsense Regina, there’s a perfectly good couch right here. You’re staying. I mean, Ginger isn’t going to move any time soon.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And as if on command a hearty meow was heard before she lay her head down and resumed her purring. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma left and came back with blankets. Piling them on Regina, Ginger climbing out and settling on top of the couch. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“There are some pajama pants in there somewhere, do not sleep in your jeans, woman. Also, what time is your panel tomorrow?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina glanced at the clock that glowed with 1:49 AM.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It starts at 8… something…”</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma grabbed her phone and started programming alarms. “Ok, I will get you there tomorrow. We are leaving at 7 AM just to be safe, and that will get you back in time to get ready. Get some sleep princess, I’ll see you in the morning.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina snuggled down in her blankets and Emma was reminded of the very first night spent with Regina. “Wake me up if you need anything, ok?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Warm brown eyes nodded. “Goodnight Emma, pleasant dreams.”</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Chapter 18</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Regina? Hey, wake up. It’s 6:15.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes refused to open, and in protest, she grumbled and tried to burrow deeper into the couch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Green eyes were alight with amusement.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Come on G, it's time to get up. Time to go be famous…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A head slowly turned to her’s, dark locks covering most of her face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Unfortunately, I will be unable to attend.” She quickly pulled the blankets over her face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A snort was heard from her blond alarm clock.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Unfortunately for you, you’re famous. And you have a job to do. Come on let’s get up…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She went to wrap her arms around Regina’s waist to hoist her up but stopped short when sharp eyes turned on her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I get five more minutes. Now unhand me.” She said in her no-nonsense voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma let go, slowly putting her hands up in surrender.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You really don't like being woken up…”</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Again her ex became hidden under a mountain of covers.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think I’ll quit, they can find someone else to do the panel today…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma rolled her eyes as she moved to turn on the coffee maker.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh please, you wouldn’t disappoint your fans. You thrive on that energy. I think you might be a narcissist…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When she looked back at the couch angry brown eyes were staring at her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If you are trying to make me angry, it’s working.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma just ignored her and moved to make her coffee. Easy since the woman liked it black. She heard Regina plop into a kitchen chair as she turned to place a white mug in front of her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette sat in the chair with one knee clutched to her chest the other leg straight out. She ran her short nails lightly across the mug in an attempt to get her eyes to focus and wake up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you.” It was quiet but Emma still made it out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, I’m not very pleasant when I haven’t had enough sleep.” Brown eyes looked around the room for something to stare at, her apology feeling weak at best.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma reached across the table and squeezed her hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know the feeling.” brown eyes lifted to meet green and she relaxed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma took a sip of her heavily sugared coffee.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Did you want to shower here, or at the hotel? I am sure I also have something you could wear…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s heart fluttered, maybe this was the perfect chance to have a reason to come back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I would love that. If it’s not too much trouble?” Suddenly she felt more awake and in a bit of a better mood.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s head gestured towards the hall.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette drained her coffee and made her way to the familiar shower. She stifled a yawn as the water started and she closed the door. She hopped in as quickly as she could, as the air in the room was still chilled from the early hour. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She stood there for a bit too long, just enjoying the warm water. When a knock told her she had 15 mins she went into a panic. She quickly washed and conditioned her hair and shaved what she could. She scrubbed her face in an attempt to get some blood flowing and right before she was about to get out, she looked to the side of the tub and there was a face looking at her, she jumped.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Shit, Ginger… how long have you been there?” She placed her hand over her heart to try and calm the erratic beating. She shook her head at herself, she needed to watch her stress levels or she was going to have a real heart attack one day.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She turned off the water and started to towel dry herself, when Ginger jumped in the wet tub and started to roll around.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes narrowed. “You are one weird child…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ginger pushed her ears back and started spinning in circles, the brunette had never seen her so playful before.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked in the mirror and decided she looked clean enough and she could touch up some makeup when she got to her room at the hotel. She was about to exit the bathroom when she noticed the damp kitten nonchalantly making her way to the litter box. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh no you don’t lady, come here!” She quickly dropped her towel and swaddled the kitten. At first, the fluffball thought it was a fun game and kept trying to eat her, but after she was unsuccessful she started to purr and enjoy being dried.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina had her wrapped like a burrito when her mother came barging in.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey Regina, we gotta go…” Her eyes went to Regina’s naked body, and then to her cat, who currently looked like a newborn baby.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina handed the kitten to her mother, “Did you lay something out for me?” She inquired as she walked into the bedroom.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma followed with her fluff.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yep, why are you naked? And why is my cat is in your towel?” Her eyes were too tired to not stare at Regina’s naked ass as she slipped into some athletic underwear, athletic shorts, and an old band t-shirt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina ran a hand through her wet hair. “Did you want a litter caked mess?” She chuckled as she threw a wink over her shoulder when she caught Emma staring.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Green eyes turned on her cat and held her a good distance away. “Why are you disgusting?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Deep laughter rolled through the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma unwrapped her kitten and watched her speed off around the house.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She handed Regina the towel and then shook her head, “Gah, I’m sorry did you want another towel?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A tan hand snatched the fluffy object and started to blot at her tendrils.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s fine. Shall we get going?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma grabbed a zip-up jacket and at the last second, tossed one to Regina as well. They hopped in the car and started off towards the hotel the con was to be held at.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina smiled over at Emma but noticed the blond was far too focused on her mission to notice her. She started to wonder if she was ever going to see Emma again, would this be the last time she got to see her face so close? Breathe in the conditioner she used? Her heart rate started to speed up. She reached for her bag, looking for her Xanax a bit too quickly, drawing attention to herself.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her hands fumbled as she found the medicine container, and she promptly dropped it somewhere on the floor.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Fuck...fuck fuck.” She went to reach for it when a warm hand was placed on her thigh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Just breathe ok? I’ll help you find it when we get there, what’s going on? Talk to me, Regina.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette closed her eyes and focused on her breathing, she placed her hand on top of Emma’s and gripped as lightly as she could.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Am I going to see you again?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma tried to remove her hand but Regina’s fought to hold on.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Emma?” Her eyes opened to see green eyes shining with wetness.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina, I told you I needed to think about it…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her hand released Emma’s only to grip her own.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But I have so much more I wanted to say to you…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s GPS loudly interrupted that they were arriving. She pulled off to the side a little bit down from the doors.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma took a deep breath, “Regina, you have to get ready, you have to get going…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Her heart was clenching as she wasn’t sure if she wanted Regina to leave quickly or not.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette shook her head back and forth. </span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“I’ll be late. I just, please a little more of your time. Then you won’t have to see me again, I just need a few more moments…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma turned the car off. “G…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette placed her hand on her stomach, she felt sick, and she did not want to throw up in Emma’s car. She didn’t want that being the last thing the blond remembered about her.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma looked at her for a moment as if debating something.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“OK. We can try and talk ok? How about you come back over tonight. We can continue to talk or just hang out for a while. This isn’t goodbye, not yet.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes flooded in relief. “Thank you, Emma! You won’t regret it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Unsure eyes tried to reach a smile, “I hope I don’t. Now get outta here and go do your job.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina leaned in and hugged Emma fast before she could protest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She pulled back and looked like there was something more she wanted to say but then when her eyes flicked to the clock she went shooting from the car, apologizing and promising to see Emma tonight.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma couldn’t wipe her stupid smile off her face. Maybe things could be different.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Chapter 19</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Regina had run to her room and had just enough time to throw on eyeliner and a pair of black ripped jeans. It went beautifully with Emma’s old dark concert tee. She looked like a more adult version of a punk girl, and she really liked it. This wasn’t something that her Queen character would wear nor the doctor. This was something that Regina liked. She smiled to herself at her realization. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She went sprinting to the staging area, slipping by sleepy fans, unnoticed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After the panel, she was so wired she couldn’t focus on anything. That normally would have something to do with the second cup of coffee she had consumed too soon after her first this morning, but she knew better. She knew her brain was sending out shockwaves of anxiety at getting to see Emma again tonight. She was so nervous and excited, it felt like the night before, but amplified. She had thought she remembered exactly how Emma looked and smelled but she had been wrong. Emma had been so much more than she remembered, and now her heart missed her even more. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She pulled out her phone and without trying, started to text the blond.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: This day is too long… please tell me I get to come over now?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: You poor baby. Ha ha. Tonight, G. We can get pizza or something. By the way, what’s your favorite drink? I can go pick some up.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: This is the worst. Why is there so much waiting around? I need a hobby. And I’m pretty easy. I can drink anything. It’s up to you. Also, you should come save me. I have 4 hours until my next panel.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Ok, then I guess we can just drink what I have at home. You could meditate? Isn’t that a thing you LA people do? Drink a green smoothie? ;) And that would be quite the experience sneaking around the convention trying to not get thrown out…</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: I’ll give you a special pass. Please come? I’ll green smoothie and meditate if you come?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma laughed out loud. Regina was always trying to strike a deal.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Woman, this is not easing back into being friends. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>R: Sure it is. We will be in a public space and just hanging out. My cast members will be here, it’ll be fun. Plus I can’t relax, I left my Xanax in your car, remember?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma kicked herself. She had been so focused on rushing Regina off to her job that she had forgotten to help her find her meds. She was glad on the one hand as Regina did have a reputation for abusing substances, any substances, but then again what if she really needed them? She did have certain conditions that required them, right? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She wiped what she had been typing and tried again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: I’ll come. Just for a bit. Where do I go?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>..........................................................................</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma pulled up to the valet station at the hotel she had dropped Regina off at this morning. She climbed out in her nice jeans, a plain black hoodie, and a black baseball hat. She awkwardly wandered over to the valet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi… my friend told me I was supposed to meet a … Lily Page here to pick up my pass?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>What if the guy had no idea what she was talking about? Apparently, due to the look on his face, he didn’t. But not too long after a lanky brunette was walking up to her flashing a brilliant smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Miss Swan?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes did a bit of a double-take at the beautiful woman before remembering that she had just spoken to her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Me. Yeah, I’m Emma.” She stuck out her hand awkwardly. The brunette smirking like they were old pals already sharing a secret.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m Lily Page. I’m here to escort you to the event.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The valet’s eyes snapped up when he realized he must have made a mistake. This must have been one of the famous people rolling in for the convention, and he had just screwed himself out of a good tip.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lily offered the man a polite smile, “Make sure her car is taken care of, please. Miss Swan, if you will follow me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma hiked her small backpack up on her shoulder and Lily started to engage in polite conversation.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So did you win a contest or are you, family?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma looked around the center as it was packed with people, all excited to be experiencing their favorite show in a whole new way.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m just a friend of one of the actors. Apparently I needed to come rescue her from boredom before she committed arson…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lily’s laughter rang out, and Emma’s chest puffed in pride at making her laugh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lily took a quick turn and grabbed Emma’s hand, tugging her into a small hallway. Holding her finger to her lips, she placed a ‘staff’ credential around Emma’s neck and motioned for her to follow down the hall. Before they reached the door Lily paused, and for the first time seemed to let her professional smile slip, if only an inch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, have fun saving the world. These actor types can be...intense.” She gave Emma a knowing smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I will try my best to be the savior everyone needs today. But don’t hold me to it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lily looked around and then reached in her pocket and handed Emma a card.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why don’t you give me a call later? So, if you do, you know save us all, I can take you for a coffee to express my gratitude.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma blushed as she took the card. Her and Regina were just going to be friends right? And they were still feeling out the friend thing. There was nothing wrong with getting this girl's number, or coffee.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I would really like that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma watched her turn away, happiness radiating from the brunette as she continued down the hall. Emma took a breath and opened the door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The room was large and had plenty of couches and tables set up with all kinds of food and snacks. Her eyes were frantically searching the room for Regina but before she could find her a man stepped in front of her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh hi, not to be rude, but I think the coffee chats with the cast start tomorrow and…” His eyes quickly noticed her lanyard and backtracked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, mam I am so sorry. We just get a lot of overzealous fans sometimes, not like you seem the type, I just wasn’t aware anyone was coming…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A hand appeared on his shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Robin, it’s fine. She’s with me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes found warm brown and relaxed at the sight.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Emma, this is Robin Lockesly my coworker, and… self-appointed bodyguard of the group.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes went wide, “Wait, Robin from the show? You shaved your head, wow. You look so different. Not like that’s not a good thing... I’m Emma.” she outstretched her hand and tried to find a way to stop talking.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She noticed an amused smile that lit up Regina’s face and she supposed her momentary embarrassment was worth it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Robin laughed wholeheartedly. “My wife thought so too. When I came home from the barber she told me under no uncertain terms that she had a husband, with a good head of hair.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina patted his chest in mock comfort. “You poor dear. Marion could give my character a run for her money.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Seriously. She’s downright scary sometimes. Well Emma it was a pleasure to meet you. I look forward to getting to know you during our lag time today.” He bowed as he wandered off to the snacks table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina grabbed Emma’s hand and pulled her towards an unoccupied area.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for coming. I was so on edge. What do you want to eat? We have some sandwiches, fruit, veggies…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma looked at the brunette then down at their hands. The brunette’s face scrunching in confusion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma cleared her throat. “Aren't you worried someone will think we’re… together?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina released Emma’s hand but took it in stride. “Oh please, these are some of my best friends. They wouldn’t mind. I’ll go grab us some snacks. Please relax.” Emma watched her go with a bounce in her step as she started to sneak food off of Robin’s plate and see how long it took for him to notice. Emma shook her head in disbelief. She had never seen this side of Regina. She didn’t know she could be, silly. Well, she had seen glimpses of it in interviews but never in real life. She was so happy to see her at peace with her life for a few moments.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But before she could continue to ask herself what she was feeling while watching the brunette, someone’s shadow loomed over her. She looked up confused, staring into the other lead of the show’s face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The redhead had the most piercing blue eyes. She looked absolutely terrifying up close. Her smile lacking warmth and Emma quickly understood where she got her moniker, Wicked, from.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So. Who are you?” Her smile wasn’t guarded; it was predatory.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma normally didn’t take well to being intimidated but she was having a bit of a hard time with being this close to another celebrity, one who clearly already hated her guts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She tried to relax her shoulders but found that they only tensed up more.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m Emma. I’m visiting Regina today…” but before she could continue Zelena was cutting her off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, are you her contest winner? Reg said that she had someone coming by today. You must feel so lucky. She is normally in very high demand, she doesn’t have time for everyone you see…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma didn’t like the way this woman was talking to her, no matter who she was. And she started to wonder if Regina would still want to be friends if she laid this woman out on her ass.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Look, I am a friend of Regina’s. I get that she is busy, that’s why when she had some time today I jumped at the chance to hang out...” Zelena’s bright blue eyes seemed to be scanning her for something and then her eyes flicked to Regina then back to the blond.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re the fucking twit?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyebrows shot up to her hairline. “Excuse me? The what?” Her voice had been a little louder than she had meant to be.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re the fucking one she almost killed herself over.” Her voice was low and lethal.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s arms crossed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think you have me confused with someone else.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina started to hurry back over at the raised voices.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Zee, stop it. Whatever you are doing…” Regina’s eyes were pleading. She knew Zee had a temper and she didn’t want her screwing this up for her. This chance to prove to Emma that they could be friends, still talk. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zee threw her head back and laughed, “Oh no. This little bitch is going to hear it from me. No one dumps my friend like that!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina pinched her nose then exploded, “Zelena, shut the fuck up!” Regina was breathing hard and everyone in the room was staring.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zelena paused from her angry assault on the blond and looked at her friend. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes turned to Emma, expecting her to flee the room and never come back. And she wouldn’t have blamed her either.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But there Emma sat, waiting for Regina to calm down.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette put her hand to her head, feeling a bit dizzy. One moment everything sounded like it was moving farther away. The next Emma and Zelena were by her side on the floor. The brunette propped up in the blond's arms. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina looked up. A third face appearing behind the two others, Robin hovering with a bag of ice.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I got this if you think she’s going to pass out again?” his eyes looked worried. He was always the best big brother Regina had never known she had needed before this show started. She offered him a reassuring smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m fine Rob. Thank you. I just got light-headed is all.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He nodded then looked for somewhere to set the ice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The redhead shaking her head, “We need to get a doctor in here. Right now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina grumbled trying to sit up on her own. Nothing seemed to hurt. Emma must have caught her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just got too stressed out. I’ll be ok now. If you stop screaming Zee…” She gave her a shove.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma ran her hand up and down the brunette’s back.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The Redhead looked like she had been kicked and after another appraising look to make sure Regina was really ok, she stormed to the other end of the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma stood and reached her hands out to help Regina.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So, Zelena knew about us?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette settled into the chair softly, “I never told her I tried to kill myself over you. She’s very ...dramatic.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma sighed and looked at Regina. “I mean, she’s protective over you. Just like Kat…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded as Emma moved to hand her some juice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She thinks she’s my big sister. She’ll calm down.” Regina’s eyes ignored the icy blue gaze that kept shooting looks her way from across the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma smiled and took Regina’s hand.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is your life always so dramatic? Geeze. When do you get to relax?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Full lips twitched into a smile, “When I’m with you dear. Why do you think I hold on so tightly?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma was speechless. She didn’t expect such a bold statement from the woman, especially somewhere she could be overheard.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma picked up her bag and unzipped it, finding the small ornate pillbox.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You left this in my car. Do you need one?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina eyed the box and stuck out her hand. She opened the box it, about to pop one, but paused. Her eyes looked up at Emma then back to the pills.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I think I can wait a while and see if I really need one.” She handed the box back to Emma.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can you hold on to that for me?” Emma smiled and nodded, replacing it back in her bag.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette beaming, “You didn’t leave, yet.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma lightly slapped at her thigh. “I’m not going to let some big-time Hollywood woman run me out of the party.” She looked at Regina carefully, “Maybe later we should talk more about why she was so angry?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brunette eyes held Emma’s, “There’s not much to discuss Emma. I told her I was in love with someone and she left and broke my heart. She doesn’t need to get so self-righteous when she doesn’t even know any of the story.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma was trying to listen but her brain short-circuited the moment Regina had told her she had loved her. Did Regina know she said that? Did she mean it? What did that mean for their friendship? Of course, Regina was just trying to get her back. Did she want to get back together with her? Would it be for real this time?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s head was swimming and apparently she had missed something Regina asked her because the brunette was staring at her expectantly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She took a sip of her water as Regina reached for her hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, guys! Did you want to join us for a game?” Robin bounced over wrapping his arms around both of their shoulders.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina rolled her eyes but looked to Emma with a smile.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s up to you.” Regina seemed to relax, she knew they would have more time to discuss what was going on tonight. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The blond looked up at the man in between them with a smirk.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What are we playing? Cause I am about to kick your ass, sir.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>Robin clapped her on the back, “I like this one Regina! Ok, so let me get the gang rounded up. Let’s play never have I ever, there have to be some drinks around here…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette let out a dark laugh. “Rob, are you going to be able to go out for our panel? This is going to be fantastic! Emma, he is such a lightweight.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Robin put his hands on his hips. “Ladies, the secret is to never lose.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Soon Robin had the table full with castmates who weren’t busy off at photo ops. Regina and Emma were joined by Mary Margaret, David, and surprisingly, Zelena. Though she refused to sit near Emma and Regina. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Where there was no alcohol, all of a sudden there was a bottle of whiskey to be passed around. Emma wondered where Robin had found that. She had been a bit worried that today would feel stuffy and awkward and that she would feel completely out of place. But she was pleasantly surprised to find out that Regina’s friends were pretty similar to her own. Robin took a sip as he started the game, rubbing his hands together as he thought of the perfect opener.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ok, ladies and gents. Name of the game is Never Have I Ever. You know the drill, drink if you have! So let me see, Never have I ever… kissed David.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mary Margaret and Regina’s eyes turned murderous at the first strike. Twin sets of brown eyes glaring daggers over the offered liquor as they stared Robin down. They looked at each other conspiratorially. They would get their revenge on nature boy.</span>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Next was Zelena. She twirled her hair as she looked across the room, her face seemed passive until she smirked at the end. “Never have I ever, as a woman, fucked a woman, at this table.” Her eyes shot to Regina.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Go ahead Gina sweetheart, drink up.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina took the bottle and downed a little too much coughing hard, Emma’s hand flying to her back. Frustrated tears holding in her eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma looked at Zelena, “Is it a crime to be friends after, Zelena?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Blue eyes locked on green. “I never said that it was. It’s a game after all.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma took the bottle and drank, then wiped her mouth. Staring at Zelena. What did she know about this woman? Not too much. She had never been an outright fan, but she had an idea what people in the industry did for fun, and how much experimentation went around with that. She gave Zee a sweet smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Never have I ever slept with a female cast member.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zelena’s eyes went wide. “Excuse me?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes held strong as she slid the bottle across the table. “You heard me, lady, drink up.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zelena stared at the bottle for a moment and then at Regina, “What did you tell her!” Her voice rose an octave. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina put her hand to her chest, “Really Zee? I didn’t tell her shit about you. Why would I tell my ex about your love life? Give me some credit, it’s not my fault she can tell.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zelena grumbled as she took a drink, sliding the bottle to Regina who tried to look relaxed next to Emma taking another sip, and then everyone looked up when David knocked on the table, his face turning red.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well pass it over here…” He cleared his throat as his face held a small smile. He didn’t look at anyone but the table noticed another set of brown eyes staring at him longingly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Robin put his hand over his mouth, “Oh shit! You guys! Why didn’t you tell us?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mary Margaret and David shrugged. Mary decided to speak up, “We wanted to see where it goes, without the pressure. But it’s going well, thank you, everyone, for asking.” She seemed to bounce in her seat as David took her hand and squeezed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mary Margaret slid the bottle to Regina, “Ok Queenie, let’s go. What do we have for nature boy?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina looked at Robin, her nails lightly tapping on the bottle. “Never have I ever… kissed a moose.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His mouth dropped open. “G! That’s a spoiler, and you can’t just go saying that without context! It made sense in the scene guys…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina put her hands up, “No breaking our contract! We have a guest, Rob. Drink up moose lover.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Everyone laughed as Robin caught the bottle and looked sad. “But… my character was high…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Laughter again peeled through the room. After a few rounds, everyone seemed more at ease and each tried to sober up as much as they could before the next panel.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina and Emma had moved off to a couch to hang out and were getting a bit touchy when Zelena wandered over.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Look. I just don't want to see you get hurt Regina. You were pretty devastated when she disappeared.” She continued to talk like the blond wasn’t there. Emma kept her hand on Regina’s leg but didn’t engage.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And, you two are way too touchy to be friends. I just want to make sure you are ok.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina took a deep breath, glancing softly at Emma, seeking permission. Green eyes inclined and Regina’s head turned back to Zelena.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Zee, you are really important to me. And it means a lot to me, that you care. This is kind of new for us. Emma isn’t used to what we go through, but I hope she sticks around.” A squeeze was felt on her leg. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zelena crossed her arms over her chest as she cast her eyes down to look at some offensive spot on the floor.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She looked like she was about to argue with the brunette then seemed to shake it off and stuck her hand out in Emma’s face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m Zelena.” Her eyes didn’t look quite apologetic but she was trying. Emma moved her hand from Regina’s thigh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Emma. And I am glad Regina has such protective friends. She deserves it.” she wrapped an arm around Regina to give her a hug and the brunette let out a small sigh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zee rolled her eyes and plopped down next to them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Ok lovelies, how did we meet? I want to hear the whole sordid tale. Don’t leave anything out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina looked to Emma as she laughed and the blond started the tale of how she was trying to take her cat’s litter out to the garbage….</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Zelena was rolling around laughing hard as her friend and her ex bickered about details when she noticed Regina’s phone start to flash. She dabbed at her eyes and slid her friend's phone off from the table to check it. Her eyes went wide at the notifications.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh fuck Gina…” Blue eyes shot up, “You need to look at this!” she shoved the phone into tanned hands as brown eyes morphed into confusion.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>TWITTER NOTIFICATION</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Regina Mills spotted getting cozy backstage?! Who is this new girl?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>TWITTER NOTIFICATION </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Since when is Regina Mills GAY? I thought she was Bi?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>TWITTER NOTIFICATION </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Nooo! How will I live knowing my ship is dead?</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes blew wide and looked at the redhead, “Zee… you didn’t…” she hiccuped as Zelena reached for her and Regina tried to fight her off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t touch me! I can’t believe you!” Zelena grabbed her arm hard, not letting her pull away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t do anything! I was right here with you two the whole time. Really Regina?!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The room paused at the outburst and everyone’s eyes turned to the person mindlessly streaming to her fans behind them, Mary Margaret.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The redhead let Regina go just as the woman exploded across the room. Slapping Mary’s phone from her hands. The pixie-haired woman seemingly a dear in the headlights.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina!” Her mouth wide open in shock.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina was huffing, she was working hard to control her breathing, but it wasn’t working. There were no breathing techniques right now, all she saw was red.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She started to scream. Zelena looked to Emma and both women moved to get Regina away from Mary. Zelena yelled at her to cool off. It wasn’t Mary’s fault, this wasn’t a private space, it was an accident. Emma tried to pull Regina to her, but the woman was hysterical.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No! She did this! She’s going to pay!” Emma wrapped her arms around Regina.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Stop it. Regina, I mean it.” She could feel the brunette struggling to breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Without warning, Regina pushed from her arms, “Oh so you think this is fine, do you? You come here as my friend and now what, leave as my girlfriend? Just when it’s convenient for you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma crossed her arms and took a step back. “None of this has been convenient for me. Do you think I want to date someone like you? You’re erratic. Do you think I want to be in the public eye? I don’t actually, but thank you for again assuming the worst of me. I didn’t put out a video of us.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina dug her nails into her skin hard. Blowing out a deep breath, visibly shaking with anger.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I ….I am just so… confused. I-I...I’m not ok.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her voice got quiet, “Are we…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alrighty, we’ve got Regina, Robin, and Zelena. Let’s go, guys, the panel is starting!” Lily announced oblivious to the room she had just walked into. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Lily took into account the pressure in the room and cocked her head, and added a small wave to Emma. Regina took notice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well, she’s pretty…” Her eyes avoided Emma’s.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma sighed, “Regina, stop it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette looked at her and steeled her gaze. “I have to go.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma reached for her, “Give me five minutes Regina…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman who turned back to her was impassive. “I have to go do my job, Emma. Feel free to stay. I need to work.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And with that, she walked away.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Robin and Zelena cast Emma worried glances as Regina led the charge out of the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When the door closed Emma rubbed at her face. When she opened her eyes a small sad brunette stood in front of her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Emma I am so sorry. I didn’t realize the nature of your relationship. This is all my fault…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma waved her off, “Mary it’s fine. I didn’t know the nature of it either. I think… her and me need to cool off. I am sorry about your phone…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The pixie-haired woman gave her a fast hug, “It’s got a good case. I am just sorry if I caused you two pain.” She pulled back to look at Emma. “You guys will be ok, right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma took a deep breath and let it out slowly, “ I think so. Just… have to let her adjust.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>David walked over and put his hand on her shoulder, “She’s a tough one, but as I am sure you know, she has a good heart in there. We all get into this business for a reason. Usually, it’s a way to get creative with all of the feelings we have inside. But sometimes I wonder if Regina is connecting with her feelings at all…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>……..</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma made her way home and decided to go on and order a couple of pizza options. She didn’t ask what Regina wanted, she just guessed. Earlier had her on edge, but she felt reassured that Regina would cool off by the time she came over for dinner. She cracked open an IPA and looked up Regina’s panel on YouTube to pass the time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She could tell right away that the woman that came out on stage was not Regina. She was plastic as they come. She smiled and she waved and she made banter with her castmates but she wasn’t there. Robin and Zelena did a good job of deflecting questions as Regina tried to settle in front of a room of hundreds of people. Robin got up and did a tik tok dance and Zelena sang a song from the last time she was on broadway. Regina did a few of her famous lines from the show, a little too well for Emma’s liking. But overall, as the panel progressed, the brunette’s mood seemed to improve. They hadn’t left much time open for questions but they still had a couple of minutes left. Emma paused as she grabbed a slice of pizza. It was getting late, and while she didn’t want to really eat until Regina got there, she thought one for a snack wouldn’t hurt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As she snacked, she resumed her video. She saw a fan bounce up and down as her turn for the mic came. The girl, Ellie, stumbled over herself as she told each of the cast how much she loved their work and what it meant to her. And then she of course turned her question on Regina. Emma’s eyes went as wide just as Regina’s had. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, dear?” Regina had tried to keep the apprehension out of her voice but failed miserably. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The young fan bounced on her toes and pulled on her rainbow jacket.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know there is a lot of talk going around today about a special moment backstage…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma’s fingers scrunched her pizza, knocking a bit of it to the floor. She cursed as she knew she would have to scrub her carpet, her eyes jumped back up to the screen like watching a car accident.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s posture didn’t shift as she waited.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How do you know when it’s love?” the young girl's voice was quiet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s eyes shone, as the person taking a video zoomed in. She cleared her throat.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, that is a very …good question. I guess… you just have to try, and fail... a lot.” She watched as Regina pushed her hair behind her ear.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t… know how to love very well. Do any of us? And I guess all you can do is keep trying and failing and just hope that someday...things can be different. I like your jacket.” She pulled at her own shirt in indication. The fan blushing and smiling before offering her thanks and walking back to her seat on cloud nine.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before any other questions could be asked, David came up on stage and pulled Regina into a dance that covertly got her off stage, and got the audience some surprise time with Prince Charming himself. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma grabbed Ginger and hugged her to her chest. “So, do we want to date her?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Ginger purred and headbutted Emma in the face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Emma nuzzled her and let her go. She got to cleaning her floor. Then decided to put on some makeup and mix some special drinks. Maybe she could make this night a little extra special. Maybe this could be the date night they had never had.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She knew Regina would feel down from earlier, and while she did need to make sure the brunette understood some boundaries, she thought maybe she could give a little. And that she could allow Regina her apologies. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As she waited her hands started to tingle. An urge to text Regina. She held off. She knew she would make it when she could. She pulled up Netflix and started something in the recommended section, as she started another beer. And she waited.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And waited.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When her phone said 11 PM she finally decided to text Regina.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>E: Hey… 11:01 PM</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There wasn’t a response.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Chapter 20</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Regina was escorted off the stage and found her way to the first bathroom stall she could find. She locked herself in the back corner of the room, sat down, closed her eyes, and put her head between her knees. She kept failing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma had given her another chance and she had lit it on fire and thrown it back in her face. She whimpered quietly as she rubbed the heels of her hands into her eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Get it together.” she whispered to herself. She couldn’t keep doing this, she knew it was one more misstep and Emma wouldn't respond to her again. She had already told her she didn’t want her, despite all of the signs Regina had thought she had seen. She wasn’t what Emma wanted, or needed. Not like this.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She held her breath as she heard the bathroom door open and close.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Stacey, did you hear her talk about her girlfriend? I told you! She’s a fag just like me! You owe me twenty bucks!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh shut up. You know that was staged. They’re probably just going to set her up with a woman next season to be all "gay friendly". You heard her, she came out as bi and totally isn’t leaving the D behind.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The brunette put her head down and groaned. She needed to get out of here. She needed to get home. It took the women a while to leave, but when they did, she bolted from the bathroom, and out the first door she could find. She grabbed her bag and hailed a ride to the airport. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The ride was short and it seemed the airport was just slowing down for the night. She wandered up to her airline and handed over her pass on her phone.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I need to move up my flight. Is there anything to LA tonight?” She leaned against the counter for support, why was she so tired?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The petite woman across from her started to click through her screen as Regina picked up her phone. No messages. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There were a couple of clicks and then the woman cleared her throat and gave Regina a hesitant smile.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Miss Mills, it looks like the last flight for LA has left already. I have one at 5 AM if that would work?” It was always a gamble when the LA folks wanted to fly home when flights were done for the night. One moment they're all business, the next they are taking your name and threatening to get you fired, especially the actors and directors with the familiar dialogue of "Don't you know who I am!".</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes looked up and Regina blew out a sigh.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s fine.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She stared at the attendant as she didn’t move. “You ok?” her voice was gentle and the attendant sprung back into action.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry. Yes, just a late night. I am sure just like you. I would want to get home too. I am very sorry I can’t make it sooner. I have some extra hotel vouchers, on the house of course.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina smiled politely and shook her head. “Thank you, that’s very sweet. I think I’ll just hang out at my gate though.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright well, mam you are all set. Have a good flight home, Miss Mills.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hope you get some sleep soon dear.” and as she turned to walk away, hiking her duffle over her shoulder she heard the woman call after her, which was easy to hear in the nearly empty room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It was really brave of you to come out. My little sister told our parents after she saw your interview. Thank you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina blushed. “I should have done it much sooner. I am very happy to hear it helped someone though. What’s her orientation if you don’t mind me asking?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She turned and adjusted her stance to focus her attention on the young woman.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She came out from behind the counter and gestured that they should start towards the gates.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’s a lesbian actually…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina smiled, “Me too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman stopped and clarity crossed past her face. “I always thought so…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina chuckled. “Was it that obvious.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman shrugged, “Only to those of us who love women. I haven’t come out yet. But my little sister inspired me, so it’s coming soon. I don’t know how you have that talk with your family, let alone the whole world…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina slowed as they were reaching TSA. “Not easily apparently. I’m still partially closeted, aren’t I? And my mother must have heard by now I take it …”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman shook her head, “You’re really special Regina, thanks for being so down to earth.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She rolled her eyes, “I may be human after all. And feel free to tell your sister I play for her team, and that she inspires me to want to finish coming out, ok?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman in front of her teared up, “I will.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina pulled out her phone. “What’s your sister’s name?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman smiled fondly, “Alyssa.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina typed a note into her phone. “Alyssa got it. And…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman smiled. “I’m Anna.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina finished typing and stuck out her hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Great to meet you, Anna, now get some rest, you hear me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And with that Regina moved through to her gate.</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>She triple checked all of her things after security because she was so tired she was sure she would miss something, she almost walked off without one of her shoes. She looked up and saw a TSA agent shaking their head at her in amusement. She smirked and started the long trek to her gate. It took about 15 minutes and a stop off to the bathroom but she was finally settling in, in front of the windows. Her plane staring back at her in solidarity. She had forgotten how much chill came off the high floor to ceiling windows and started to rub her arms to create warmth. She would either fall asleep or need to walk around the airport for the next few hours. She tried to get comfortable in the chair, the armrests making it near impossible. She eyed a span of seats across the room that were devoid of armrests . She pondered making the journey. But as she felt too lazy to move right now, she plugged in her charger under her seat and settled in on her Instagram app.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She took a photo of herself sitting in her airport seat. And then stared at the cursor bar blinking away at her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She started typing and when she stopped she re-read it about ten times.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hi Everyone! I have a confession to make and I wanted to make this on my personal page as this is something very personal to me. Earlier tonight I met a woman named Anna who’s little sister Alyssa recently came out of the closet. I was told that my interview helped her feel ok with her decision and that if someone like me could do it, she could too. I am so happy you found your strength Alyssa, but I have a confession to make, you inspired me. I tried to be brave and truthful about who I am, but I wasn’t as brave as I wanted to be. I should have come out as a Lesbian, not a bi woman. It can be scary to be judged not just by the world at large but within the LGBTQ community. I hope this doesn’t change my relationship with my fans, I am so grateful for all of you and those who are bisexual I acknowledge you. You are real, you are perfect and you are seen. I hope everyone can spread a little more love and tolerance in the world. &lt;3 Regina.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>She smiled as she wiggled in her chair and hit post. She watched the analytics as they didn’t move. It was getting late, and maybe people weren't online…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She refreshed the page. 58 likes. Then 157. The number kept climbing. And then the comments started to roll in. She couldn’t believe how positive most of them were. She decided she should log off soon before she started to read mean comments that she did not need to be seeing right now. And just as her post hit 1,000 likes, she got a ping that someone had requested to message her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>@Alyssa299.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She clicked to look up the profile but as she did the notification went away. She crinkled her eyes. She clicked add. And started to type a message. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hey is this the famous Alyssa? Hope you are not mad I mentioned you tonight, you did really inspire me. You have a pretty great sister.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She watched as it was read and wondered for a brief moment if the girl was mad at her. She didn’t even know her last name, did this still count as outing? She hadn’t right? But her worries were short-lived as a sweet message came through.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You are perfect and enough and seen too. &lt;3 No worries. Enjoy your night Regina! And my sister says hi. Love you and hope you are ok. --Alys</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina closed her phone and grabbed her stuff to move over to the chairs where she could lay down. She doused on and off for a while. She felt still, and content. Emma would be so proud of her…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Fuck. Emma. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She shot up and looked at that time. She hadn’t been thinking clearly earlier. She had lost herself and now it was the early hours of the morning. Her flight would be coming up soon enough. She opened her phone and wanted to kick herself when she saw a message from Emma.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She grabbed her bags. She still had two hours. She could make it, or change her plans. She rushed towards the exit. She called a Lyft and bounced as she agonized over every ticking moment. The driver pulled up and she got in the car and continued to bounce her leg.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman didn’t even take a second look at her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Headed home?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Regina turned her head to the front of the car unsure how to answer that, but found herself speaking, “Yes, finally.”</span>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>
  <span>“Long day?” The woman’s voice softened.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina relaxed a little, “The longest.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman shook her head, “It always feels like that till your head hits that pillow. We’ll get you there soon!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The woman turned on some music and they just enjoyed the early hour.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Regina arrived she thanked the driver and got out and started towards Emma’s door. She saw the apartment lit up in beautifully colored lights. And just as she was getting closer. They turned off. And she heard Emma, faintly, start to cry. She was standing outside her door. She was there now. She was right here. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Whatever. It’s fine. We don’t need her right Ging?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina’s hand that had been going to knock, paused. She was so selfish. Emma didn’t need this. She had been right. Emma deserved better than the real her. She needed to stop this. She took a step back. She walked back to the street and called another car.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>……………………………</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Chapter 21</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Regina stumbled into the house at 7:52 AM. Loudly banning into the kitchen table.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Gina?” Katherine’s voice was slightly startled.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She sat up on the couch where she had been watching a tv show and hit pause.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Babe, I thought you were gone till tomorrow?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina dropped her duffle and made her way over to her friend, the curtains still drawn shut, keeping out the early morning light.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina moved to block the tv and started to take her clothes off. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Katheryn’s eyes went wide in confusion as her friend pulled her shirt over her head, almost fell, pulled off her pants, and scratched herself to get free of her bra. Finally finishing with pushing black lace part of the way down her thighs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She stood in front of Katheryn, naked. Her eyes were unfocused. Trying to find Kat’s as she moved to sit on her lap. Kat watching her friend in concern.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Babe. What are you doing?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina cupped her face with one hand. “Why do you do it? Why do you love me?"</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She lightly trailed her hand down smooth skin. "You work so hard at it… I can be what you want…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat grabbed her friend’s hand and lightly removed it from her face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina…” she almost never first named her. It was always: Gina, G, babycakes, or baby doll. But using her first name, that was serious.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina shook her head. “I can put on a strap-on…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat brushed dark short layers away from sorrowful eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Regina, there is nothing wrong with you. You know you're my best friend. I’m just not gay. And you know that deep down, this isn’t right either. We’re family, and like, not in a gross fucked up way.” She ran her nails across Regina’s scalp causing the brunette to take a breath.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just want to be happy…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat leaned forward and kissed her forehead. “I know, baby girl.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown pools opened slowly. “Why won’t you fuck me?” her face dark.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat sighed and lifted Regina off of her lap. “Don’t make me throw you in the pool downstairs G.... cause I will.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina sat on the couch like a petulant child. “Plenty of people want to fuck me!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat rolled her eyes, “Yep, they sure do.” She moved to the kitchen to get her friend some Gatorade and crackers. She walked back, set down the items, and pulled a blanket over her friend's naked body.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, now you want to cover me up…” Regina shot back as she glared at her friend’s wandering form. Why the fuck was the world spinning so hard? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat went to go get a glass of wine for herself when she heard a rustling noise, followed by frustrated grunts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Her eyes looked up for some divine intervention.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Regina Mills. You better not be masturbating on that couch right now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The sounds didn’t stop.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat downed her drink and walked back across the room. She saw her friend angrily clutching at her breast with one hand and roughly sliding the other one between her thighs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat facepalmed and moved her hand down slowly till she could see the mess in front of her. She shook her head and ripped off the blanket and grabbed Regina’s hands pinning them over her head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You are going to be so embarrassed later! And we do NOT have hate sex with ourselves? Am I quite clear!” She knew she had startled her by shouting but her patience was wearing thin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She felt Regina jump at her tone and freeze. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat took a deep breath and released her.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you want to tell me what happened?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes avoided hers and a head was shaken.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat sat down on the couch. “Ok. fine. Then you need to get up and drink this and eat this and then you are sleeping whatever this is, off. I mean it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina pulled the blanket slowly up herself and sat there quietly as her friend handed her liquid and crackers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat watched her eat. “How the fuck did you get this drunk on a flight? How did you even get home?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Brown eyes stayed glued across the room, “I’m famous.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>………………………………..</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina woke with a pounding headache somewhere in the late afternoon. Kat had left her two pills, clearly not the full bottle as she was mad at her, but enough that she didn’t want Regina to completely suffer. Regina figured she should take that as a win. It was more than she deserved. She shot the two pills into her mouth and then finished a second sport drink her friend had left for her, as she lay her head back down.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat must have heard her moving as she returned to the room, but didn’t speak to her at first. She walked up to the windows and pulled open the curtains. Fuck, ok maybe she did deserve that, like a lot.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat stood with her back to her, arms folded.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina didn’t know where to start, but she knew she had to talk to her best friend eventually.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kat?” her voice was gravely and quiet. She started to shake slightly. Was this the moment Kat finally decided she had enough and threw her away? Was she trying to push her away? She seemed to ruin everything she touched.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat’s shoulders heaved but she didn’t respond right away. She turned around abruptly and angrily pulled her cell phone out of her yoga pants. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Silent Retreat, we leave in two days. We need some healing. This isn’t just for you anymore.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina tried to swallow the lump in her throat. “You told me that hippy stuff was stupid…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat nodded, “Oh, I think it is. But clearly, we need to try something new.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina grabbed a pillow and pulled it to her to cover herself. She pressed her face into it and started to let her tears fall.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>She soon felt an arm around her shoulder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
  <span>“You are a full-time job…” Brown eyes raised above the pillow.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat’s eyes met hers, “You are pushing off that movie, and the show.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina bit her lip. “Kat… I can’t…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat’s eyes narrowed, “You are taking time off. I just told you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina nodded meekly. “Ok.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat gave her another hug as Regina tucked herself into the blond’s side.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I tried to sleep with you again, didn’t I?” She laughed sadly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yep, you sure did.” Kat sighed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Regina snuggled closer. “Thanks for letting me know I’m worth more than I think I am.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kat squeezed her harder. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Chapter 22</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Why is this in the fucking desert!” Kat complained as they carried their bags from the car to some remote lodge. </p><p>Regina rolled her eyes, “You were the one who decided we needed to do this. My ass is in a fricken legal battle right now over my contracts…”</p><p>Kat turned around and almost hit her with her bag. “First off. We are here, for you! And I thought we would be in nature, not around a bunch of fricken sand! And tell them you tried to kill yourself again. That’ll do the trick.” She stomped off leaving Regina to follow her at her own pace.</p><p>When she got up to the check-in, Kat was already fuming at the unsuspecting worker. “What do you mean I give you my phone?”</p><p>The calm woman at the table seemed like she must have taken something as her blissed-out state was in no way affected by Katheryn’s anger.</p><p>“It’s for the soul doll. We hold your phones and that allows you to disconnect from the world around you and reach a sense of inner peace.” She bowed her hands together like some kind of ninja master. She had unruly curly hair and a twinkle in her eye that irked the blond right away.</p><p>She turned back to her friend, “I am going to murder you in your sleep for this Mills.”</p><p>Regina’s shoulder’s sagged as she removed her phone and handed it over as well.</p><p>“I know.” </p><p>She had tried telling Katheryn sorry a million times but the woman said she didn’t want to talk, she wanted to be somewhere she knew the brunette would be safe and not talk to her for a while. Not have to feel that responsibility.</p><p>Regina moved to pick up Kat’s bag in apology and the woman let her carry it.</p><p>They were given robes that Kat refused to wear at first but gave up with the hotter climate and quickly switched to the short robe. </p><p>The first item on the agenda was a sound bath. Something Regina had been excited to try, and she grabbed her and Katheryn mats on the way in and laid them out in what she thought was a good location in the tent. The woman from earlier and a slightly smaller and more uptight woman walked in to lead the sounds. The stiff one carried a single bowel and a rain stick as the curly-haired one carried a flute tied around her neck and a basket of bowels.</p><p>“All right everyone, I’m Freya, and let’s raise our hands in silence. Who has done a sound bath before?”</p><p>Regina could feel the frustrated energy waving off of Katheryn, she really hoped that this weekend would allow her to relax, the brunette felt bad enough.</p><p>Everyone raised their hands but them. The stiff lady tried to offer them a smile but it came off as a grimace.</p><p>Freya, rolled her eyes. “This is my friend and assistant for the weekend Sunshine…” The stiff woman smacked her in the arm and she laughed, “Fine, fine, her name, not star name, is Elizabeth. Lizzie for short, for me…” She was again whacked for that.</p><p>“Ow. Ok lady geeze. She lost a bet and has to be here this weekend? Anyone else?”</p><p>Elizabeth’s eyes surveyed the room and connected with Katheryn’s and this time smiled. They exchanged an understanding. Perhaps that they might sneak off in the night and drink.</p><p>“Well, we are lucky to have all of you here. We will first have you lay down. Everyone go on. Don’t worry about getting the dirt in your hair, we have a bathing session later.”</p><p>Kat grunted as she lay her hair down, the mat not big enough to keep it clean.</p><p>Regina’s eyes moved to the top of the tent, focusing on the air holes where she could stare at the blue sky.</p><p>“Alright everyone close your eyes. And let’s focus on your breaths. Take one in, one, two, three. Hold. And let it out one, two, three.”</p><p>The women heard a chime as Elizabeth clung two ting symbols together looking to her friend for reassurance. Freya gave her a thumbs up.</p><p>“Ok ladies feel the warmth and the light radiating into your chest from the calm. We are going to start with the bowls and feel free to cry. Elizabeth, the rain stick.”</p><p>The rain sounds started and after a few minutes, humming sounds started to thrum.</p><p>“Everyone feel the vibrations in your head. In your chest, your heart, your groin.”</p><p>Katheryn snorted and Regina opened one eye to see her friend’s eyes closed but clearly amused. At least she didn’t seem so angry.</p><p>The sounds continued, weaving their vibrations around the participants. Katheryn started to relax and actually fell asleep. Regina heard her lightly snoring next to her and her chest warmed. Katheryn seemed at peace, well in sleep anyway, but that was at peace right? She wasn’t messing up this weekend for her friend.<br/>Regina closed her eyes again and let everything go. </p><p>When the sounds were over and they were guided back to themselves. She lightly squeezed Kat’s arm. The woman blinked slowly then rubbed at her eyes. Sitting up and stretching.</p><p>Freya’s voice was still quiet. “All right everyone, when you are ready. Make your way to the mess hall we are going to do an herbal tea cleanse next, and listen to nature. Elizabeth here is going to lead us in the tea-drinking ceremony, We will see you all in there.”</p><p>Brown eyes watched the women go, and waited on her mat for the blond to be ready. Kat got up slowly and stretched, inclining her head for Regina to follow. The brunette trailing behind like a lost kitten.</p><p>They found seats at the round tables and Regina wondered for a moment if Katheryn wanted her to sit somewhere else for a while. She paused as Kat walked across the room and sat down. This was eerily similar to her first day at school where she didn’t know where to sit at lunch. She had walked down to the lunchroom with her class in a line and they had been told to take a seat, but everyone seemed to move faster than she did. She stood there frozen with so many tiny eyes staring back at her own. She held her pony lunchbox to her chest wondering if it were stupid and if everyone was about to start laughing at her. Her teacher, clearly frustrated with what she wrongly assumed was defiance, started to raise her voice at her to just take a seat. Regina started to shake, but then heard a loud scrape of a chair. Kathryn Midas, the heir to the Midas fortune, and cool girl, had slammed her chair back and was marching up to the front of the room. Straight toward the brunette. Regina just knew this was going to be bad. She started to cry and Kat stopped right in front of her and looked her in the eyes and then looked up at the teacher and grabbed Regina’s arm.</p><p>“You don’t have to be such a bitch! Use better instructions!” And she flipped her hair and pulled Regina to her table, where there were no extra seats. She released her arm and took up her vacated seat again, leaving half of it open. She rolled her eyes and pulled Regina down in the chair with her.</p><p>The teacher at the front of the room’s face had gone from pink to red, to purple. Katheryn was the one student that she couldn’t cross. Her family had power, privilege, and Kat was not only at the top of the class but had a smart tongue. She clearly had gotten her mother’s quick wit for cutting others down to size, a trick the woman had picked up from growing up an unwealthy and a working class waitress. Always teaching her kids the value of self-respect and sticking up for others.</p><p>Regina settled in her seat, pushing her hair behind her ear. Kat wrapped an arm around her.<br/>“We’re friends. I got your back.”</p><p>Regina returned to present-day as Katheryn rolled her eyes and stomped over and grabbed her arm, dragging her to the back table. And pointing for her to sit down next to her. Regina sat quickly and waited as they brought the tea around.</p><p>It smelled earthy, and she was a bit worried that Katheryn would spit it back out at the first taste, the woman was very picky. But to her surprise, as she watched Kat tip the cup to her lips, her face softened. Regina’s eyes turned to her own cup. She couldn’t tell what was in it, but if it had Katheryn’s approval it must be good, and sweet. She took a sip and smiled. It tasted like fresh honey and flowers. Multiple teapots were brought around by Elizabeth for refills and all of the women in the room enjoyed the sounds of nature for the next few hours.</p><p>After the tea, there was a dinner of what Katheryn would have happily deemed normal food. They had bean burritos and tacos and fresh fruit juice that neither woman could place.</p><p>After dinner, Freya took to the front of the room, lightly ringing a bell.<br/>“Now, I hope you are all feeling a little more at peace than when you arrived,”</p><p>Kat rolled her eyes, but bumped her shoulder into Regina’s, making the woman’s mouth drop open. </p><p>“We are going to be doing a special peyote journey tonight for those that are interested. Elizabeth is going to be keeping watch over all of us, as her energy is not in the proper alignment for the journey tonight.”</p><p>The stiff blond shook her short hair back and forth in a ‘no’ response but smiled fondly at her co-leader. Despite their vast differences, it was clear they were very good friends. </p><p>Regina figured that this was something they would not be doing and thought about how maybe she could get some time to talk to Katheryn tonight.</p><p>When Freya released them to either join them down by the beach at a lake or to shower and sleep, Kat tugged Regina along.</p><p>She wanted to ask Kat what was going through her head but tried to remain respectful of her friend's mental space. After all, they were here so she could have a break. </p><p>Kat grabbed her hand as they walked down the path. Reminding her of how Katheryn would always lead her out on the playground to play when she got too nervous.</p><p>Then all gathered round in a circle as Freya lit a fire, Elizabeth bringing along two jugs. </p><p> </p><p>Regina looked at Kat with a questioning glance. Kat didn’t do drugs. Sure she had tried them before, but she was always above them. Regina sighed, she was going to embarrass herself again she was sure and was resigned to her fate. Maybe that was why Katheryn wanted to do this ‘vision quest’ she wanted to punish Regina. She looked over at Kat with sad eyes, if the blond wanted to teach her a lesson, she supposed she deserved that. She tried to offer her a smile but her friend ignored her.</p><p>Everyone sat quietly while the jugs were passed around, Freya bowing her hands in welcome.</p><p>“Everyone. When the pitcher gets to you, take a good deep swig of it, think of a question, and pass it on. Everyone's quest tonight will be different, but none of us will walk through this journey alone.”</p><p>Kat took the jug and downed a good bit and pushed it into Regina’s lap. She sighed and took a good drink. Coughing a bit at the bitter taste and feeling some dribble down her lip. She looked up and Elizabeth was kindly smiling at her, she wasn’t aware that woman could smile.</p><p>She passed on the jug. She wondered how Kat had not reacted to the taste, but before she could wonder too long her friend was turning around and throwing up. Brown eyes going wide.</p><p>Freya walked over and offered Kat some water, but she refused. She was determined to do this tonight. Freya patted her on the shoulder and started to speak again.</p><p>“Alright, everyone. Your quests are about to begin. Try not to wander off too far if you do feel so moved to wander.” Her hands making bird motions, and with that, she sat down and started to make some deep ‘Ohm’ sounds.</p><p>Kat wiped at her mouth one more time then grabbed Regina by the arm, hoisting her up. When had her friend gotten so strong? She should have had her carry the bags earlier…</p><p>Kat held her hand and they headed for some tree cover.</p><p>Regina followed, she would follow Kat anywhere. As the sounds of Freya’s… throat wobbling grew fainter, she felt the blond slow up. As she looked around the world seemed to be dancing with new colors.</p><p>Her friend pulled her behind a tree.<br/>“These trees are so fucking loud. Do you hear them singing? It’s worse than that woman’s sounds!” Kat dropped Regina’s hand to rub her ears in irritation.</p><p>Regina shook her head as she tried to focus on Katheryn. She couldn’t hear any singing. Was there singing? She only saw the dancing colors…</p><p>Kat grabbed Regina’s cheeks, “We are finishing this for once and for all, yes even with all of you perverts watching. Gina, take your top off.”</p><p>Regina bit her lip and followed directions. Her top easily coming off and over her head, even as she was slowing down.</p><p>Kat’s eyes wandering. “Pants off.” She glared behind Regina at the tree.</p><p>“There’s nothing to see here. You, turn around. Gods …”</p><p>Regina smiled. Kat was already high. She wondered when she would start to feel it too.</p><p>Kat’s finger tracked Regina’s last two items of clothing in the air. “Those come off too.”</p><p>Regina looked down at herself then hooked her fingers in her underwear and pulled them down, tripping when she tried to take them off and landing on her butt. Looking up at Kat.</p><p>Kat sighed in frustration. “Are you going to stand up and take your bra off?”</p><p>Regina looked at the ground then back up. “I wish I could. I don’t seem to have legs anymore. Are you mad?” </p><p>Kat plopped her butt on the ground. “No. I’m not mad. We can live on the ground from now on. But I don’t know how that is going to work in our home, we are not set up for this. She reached forward and poked at Regina’s bra.</p><p>The brunette taking the hint, her arms searching behind her back for the clasp. Then handing her bra to Katheryn, presuming she was going to find some secret fortune hiding in the straps.</p><p>“What does it say?” Her eyes were hanging on Katheryn’s every word.</p><p>Blue eyes looked into the lining. “Woah… there’s a lot of stuff in here.” </p><p>Regina leaned her head in to look too, frustrated that she couldn’t see what Kat was seeing.</p><p>She huffed. “No fair, I want to see it too.”</p><p>Kat dropped it between them. “It’s hard to explain in words, but I’ll tell you later.” She patted Regina on the head and the woman nodded her understanding.</p><p>Kat removed her shirt and took her bra off and scooted closer.</p><p>Regina’s eyes staring at her bright pink nipples.</p><p>Blue eyes watched her friends in amusement. <br/>“I am going to prove something to you.”</p><p>Regina’s eyes raised slowly. “Ok. But it ….might be a little hard for me to focus when you're naked, you should probably put my clothes on…” She nodded as her eyes studied Kat’s breasts.</p><p>Kat cupped Regina’s cheek and waited for brown eyes to find hers.<br/>“Are you ready? This is what you have asked for, for a long time. You ok?”</p><p>Regina’s held her breath, her heart tap dancing. Then again, maybe it was clawing out of her skin right now and Kat was going to find it on the floor. That thought bothered her, Kat wouldn’t like that. But before her brain could wander too far she looked back up into Kat’s eyes.</p><p>“Are you going to kiss me or what?” she asked annoyed. The blond’s laugher peeling out.</p><p>“Yes.” She grabbed Regina’s face and crashed their lips together, moving Regina’s hands to her boobs.</p><p>Regina froze. Her lips stopped as she felt Kat’s thinner ones move against hers. Her hands being encouraged to massage Kat.</p><p>She giggled. Kat’s face pulled back. “Excuse me? What is so funny?”</p><p>Regina’s eyes went to Kat’s boobs and instead of squeezing she poked one with her finger. And she watched it jiggle. Her face alight in amusement. </p><p>“Bouncy!” She pulled her hand back to cover her face as she laughed. Kat’s eyes rolled, reaching her own hand forward and poking at Regina’s chest. The brunette in turn giggling more. Watching how Kat’s boobs swayed with movement, they were a whole size larger than her own.</p><p>Kat glared. “No more my boobs for you, you don’t appreciate them.” She hid them under her hands and smiled in triumph as her friend's face fell, object permanence clearly disrupted. </p><p>“Oh...they’re gone.” Her face looked passive. Then she smiled.<br/>“Emma has the best boobs.” She looked like she had just told her mother she had gotten straight A’s for the first time. Like Emma’s boobs were something she had created herself, she beamed. </p><p>Kat knocked into her friend’s shoulder, “Rude.”</p><p>Kat leaned back, “Come on, get over here. Let’s fuck.”</p><p>Regina looked around. “I mean what if Fred sees? I don’t want to mess things up. You guys are supposed to get married right? I don’t think this is very ladylike of me to get with someone else’s woman Kat…”</p><p>Kat grabbed her and pulled her forward. Regina landed on top with a grunt. Kat reached her hand between them and started feeling around. Regina’s eyes going wide.</p><p>“What are you doing?”</p><p>Kat bit her tongue, “Trying to focus on finding your vagina where is it…”</p><p>Regina rolled her eyes, “It’s not a penis it’s on the inside… what are you doing?” She burst out laughing. Her friend's fingers were flopping around like a fish,</p><p>“Don’t mock the straight girl, Gina. Any closer?”</p><p>Regina couldn’t stop laughing, rolling off of her friend into a hysterical fit of laughter.</p><p>“Oh, my god Kat! Do you ever masturbate?” Her breaths coming in short huffs she couldn’t get enough oxygen in.</p><p>Kat moved her hand to herself. “It works fine when I do it, princess. I don’t think you have sex right…”</p><p>Regina looked up at the sky. “So why are we trying to have sex? Not that this isn’t entertaining…”</p><p>The blond threw her hands down frustrated. “Because! To show you that you don’t like me like that.”</p><p>Regina looked at the stars. “That was pretty weird.” She broke out into a smile.</p><p>“I can’t believe you tried to have sex with me.” Her smile was beaming.</p><p>Unamused blue eyes turned to brown. “You couldn’t get it through your thick head...we’re just friends….”</p><p>Regina nodded. “Yeah…” She felt light.</p><p>She looked back out into the night, “Too bad I don’t have feet anymore. I wish they could carry me to Emma… I miss her.”</p><p>Kat reached over and grabbed her hand, “I know I miss her too. She was good for you. Maybe you could sleep with one of the other people here…”</p><p>Regina’s eyes rolled, “Now you’re just horny. I don’t need to sleep with anyone here, I just need to be still. And maybe pee somewhere to mark our territory, I’m not sure what we do now that we live outside…”</p><p>She sat there and started to plan an agenda in her head for what their new life would entail. Maybe she could still crawl around? That would be better than being stuck in one spot for the rest of time…</p><p>Kat sighed, “I would carry you to Emma, you don’t need feet. I got you.”</p><p>Regina smiled. “I know you would. You are the best savior anyone could ever ask for Kat. I love you. I’m sorry I am such a problem.”</p><p>The blond squeezed her hand. “I’m not that good, but we’ll get you through it. Maybe I’ll get back together with Fred… who knows maybe I’ll go find a woman now…”</p><p>Regina’s eyes went wide. “One night with me turned you gay?” Her voice raised an octave.<br/>“Oh Kat, I am so sorry. I take it back. Undo. Undo!” Her voice became frantic as her friend grabbed her shoulders.</p><p>“Calm yourself before the trees start crying, they miss their mommy and you are reminding them. I love Fred but I feel like I need some more time out there on my own first. As wild as you are sometimes, I have to admit I wish I was a tiny tiny bit more like you. But don’t let that go to your head.”</p><p>Regina nodded resolutely. “Never, I won’t.”</p><p>Kat nodded, “Let’s get you home safe kid.”</p><p>Regina burrowed into Kat’s arms.</p>
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<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Chapter 23</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Elizabeth was gathering up the participants when she stumbled upon the two friends in the past the first clearing off the trail. Naked. The woman first shielded her eyes and then started to frantically look for their clothes. When she found them without a problem she heaved a sigh of relief. Then she inched forward to poke the blond, as the brunette was snoring loudly.</p><p>“Hey. We were going to head back soon. You guys about ready?”</p><p>Kat rubbed at her face and looked down at her bare chest. Then at her friend beside her.</p><p>“Well, fuck. That happened.” She rolled her eyes.</p><p>She looked at the older woman offering her her clothes.<br/>“This happen, when you tried this stuff?”</p><p>Elizabeth snorted, “No, I am far too uptight, even on drugs. But I did scare some sand with my shouting…”</p><p>Kat shook her head laughing lightly. “That sounds fun, I love shouting. I wanted to yell at the stupid trees they kept singing.”</p><p>Elizabeth looked at her friend sleeping on the ground, “The things we do for our best friends…”</p><p>Kat’s face scrunched in amusement, “How did you know we weren’t lovers?”</p><p>Elizabeth gave her a knowing smile. “That brunette is so not your type, she’s too submissive. You seem a lot like myself actually, someone who enjoys a challenge.”</p><p>Kat’s face blushed, “Yes actually, that’s pretty spot on. So are you straight too?”</p><p>The older woman rolled her eyes, “I thought I was, but it took some time for me to realize that I never allowed myself to explore anything about myself. I seem to find as I have gotten older, that I don’t give a flying fuck what anyone else thinks.”</p><p>Kat nodded, “I get that. So do you drink?”</p><p>The older woman’s eyes twinkled, “Oh please sweetheart, like a fish. No one can keep up with me.”</p><p>Kat moved her hair into a ponytail. “How about when we get back to civilization you let me take you out for a drink? And we’ll see who’s a fish out of water.”</p><p>Elizabeth reached a hand out. “Deal.”<br/>…………………………………………………..</p><p>Regina woke up in her bed, alone. She looked around. Where had Katheryn gone?</p><p>It was still early, but she figured their day would already be beginning. Before she could get up to gather a search party, Kat came rushing in through the dorm, trying to be quick.</p><p>Regina watched as she held her robe closed, in a hurry.<br/>“Kat?” </p><p>Wild blue eyes turned to her friend as she clutched at her heart.</p><p>“Fuck G, you scared me!” she whispered, “Why are you up?”</p><p>Regina looked around the room, “It’s morning, where have you been? Wait did we have sex last night?”</p><p>Her eyes furrowed and her face tried to place the memories in order, and filter out things that were obviously just a part of the drug trip.</p><p>Kat plopped down next to her, “What you and I were doing was not sex babycakes. Now what I did after that, now that was a success, dear.” She winked and Regina’s face went slack.</p><p>“You?”</p><p>“Me.”</p><p>Regina opened and closed her eyes a few times. “Who? Omg Katheryn!” She was smacked with a pillow to her face.</p><p>“G, I can fuck women too, you aren’t the only one allowed to, geez.” she crossed her arms and pouted.</p><p>Regina shook her head and though she was still in a haze, she tried again, “Well, how did it go?”</p><p>Kat blushed, “It was  really  hot.”</p><p>Regina smiled. “That’s exciting! I can’t believe you did that!”</p><p>Kat smirked, “So are we done trying to sleep together now?”</p><p>Regina pulled Kat into a hug. “Yeah I think my heart is breaking, but I’ll get over you and your floppy fingers eventually.” she let out a loud laugh at her friend's enraged face, wiggling her fingers for good measure. </p><p>“I told you I wasn’t doing it wrong! You just don’t do it right…”<br/>Regina beamed, “Yeah… I don’t know how to have sex with women. But I am sure, like you, I will figure it out.”<br/>……………………………………………………………………………………</p><p>Katheryn had been busy texting Elizabeth when a pile of clothes was chucked into her path from Regina’s open door, narrowly missing her.</p><p>She looked up from her phone and did a double-take.</p><p>“Regina, why is your shit all over your floor?”</p><p>Regina didn’t even spare her a glance. “Couldn’t sleep. Have you watched that Japanese woman on Netflix?”</p><p>Kat just slowly moved into the room and looked for a spot to perch on the bed, finding none, she swept a pile of clothes on the floor, looking up to see a hard stare from the brunette.</p><p>“What? There’s other stuff on the floor? It’s fine.”</p><p>“You’re messing with my process.” She groaned then turned back around and reached for another item.</p><p>She held it in her hands. She felt nothing. She looked around at her items scattered across the floor, why did none of her clothing spark joy? She needed a new wardrobe. She turned and looked at Kat who was looking at her like she had two heads.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>Kat closed her mouth and tried to tidy a bit of the bed.<br/>“I’m just here for moral support…”</p><p>Regina held out a jacket. “Does this look like me?” Her eyes were a bit manic.</p><p>The blond took the jacket and held it up. Dark faux leather complimented her friend's skin nicely, it would be a shame if she threw it out.</p><p>“Yes. Definitely. Very Regina.” Regina took the item and carefully placed it back on a hanger in her now empty closet. She stared at the mostly blank canvas. One dark jacket. That was her style. She could do this. She picked up a dress but before she could stare at it too long, Kat was pulling it from her hands and gesturing for her to sit on the bed.</p><p>“Not this one.” She tossed it into the hall and got to work picking through Regina’s clothes, as the woman watched on in relief.</p><p>“I can do this on my own….”</p><p>Blue eyes raised in amusement, “Apparently you are stuck. If this is as far as you got last night. Hm, how do you feel about these ripped jeans?”</p><p>Brown eyes considered the color. “If we fade them, I like them.”</p><p>The blond turned and tossed them into the window sill, moving on to another pile.</p><p>Regina looked around the room, “Think I should get a dog?”</p><p>Blue eyes rolled, “Regina, you are never around enough for a dog.”</p><p>“You made me take some time off, remember? I could get a dog.”</p><p>Kat dumped some items in Regina’s lap. “Take a second look at these, I think they go. And what kind of dog? That’s a big step for us.”</p><p>Regina sifted through the items, agreeing that they looked very much not like her own style.</p><p>“Not for us Kat, for me. And I think I’ll start hiking every morning. Want to come?”</p><p>“Sure, baby doll.”</p><p>Regina chucked a skirt at her friend, “I’m serious.”</p><p>Blue eyes glanced her way, “If your ass gets me up to go, I will go. Now can we please clean up this room? And then we are hoping online and getting you some new clothes, this is pathetic. Let’s raid my closet and see if there’s anything in there for you…”</p><p>Kat reached down and saw the items a little too late, the sweats that Regina had initially borrowed, now presumably stolen from Emma. Kat looked up into cagey watery eyes.</p><p>“I should probably send those back, shouldn’t I? I just wanted something to remember her by… it’s pathetic.”</p><p>She moved off the bed reaching for the clothes, Kat holding them out of reach.</p><p>“Let’s put them in a box. If Emma hasn’t asked for them back, I am sure she’s not missing them. You can deal with this when you are ready. Let’s leave it for another day.”</p><p>Regina’s hand retracted, moving quickly to wipe away a few tears that had darted past her defenses.</p><p>“I can deal with it next week.” She moved around Kat to find a small box to put them in.</p><p>“I’m cleaning up my life Kat, you’ll see. This year is going to be different for me.”</p><p>Kat set what she had been folding down and gathered Regina into a hug.</p><p>“I know baby girl. Just take it slow ok?”</p><p>Regina didn’t do anything slowly.</p>
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